Temptations And Missed Opportunities

[Carolyn Marie]

I was thinking (not always a good thing ) about some old memories recently, and wondered

if any of you had similar experiences.

When I was 12, my best friend invited me to go trick or treating with him on Halloween. He said his

older sisters were willing to dress several of us up, and would even put makeup on us.

Well, this was my opportunity to do what I had been dreaming about. You can imagine how excited

I was. I could dress like a girl, go out in public, and no one would care! At that time I was so small

and skinny, I probably would have looked like a girl.

Then the big day came, and lo and behold, I got cold feet . I don't really know why, to this day.

I couldn't go through with it, to my everlasting disappointment.

The reason I titled this post "missed opportunities" is this: what if I had gone? How would that

have changed my feelings about myself? Would it have led to an earlier realization of who I

was meant to be? How would my life have changed? I think about that from time to time, and

have no answers.

So, like I said, have any of you had "missed opportunities" of your own, and regrets about what

you didn't do? Thanks for sharing.

Carolyn Marie

[Guest April63]

I think I might have had some missed opportunities, but nothing trans related.

[Guest Emily H]

I have never experienced anything like that, except, not very significant as that. I have never had an opportunities like that.

But I can understand the feeling of thinking of how things could have gone different, and how one decision can affect so much.

~Somebody

[Guest Flora]

I was thinking (not always a good thing ) about some old memories recently, and wondered

if any of you had similar experiences.

When I was 12, my best friend invited me to go trick or treating with him on Halloween. He said his

older sisters were willing to dress several of us up, and would even put makeup on us...

...So, like I said, have any of you had "missed opportunities" of your own, and regrets about what

you didn't do? Thanks for sharing.

Carolyn Marie

I felt my heart drop for you as I read that. I have actually had one opportunity slip by so I can totally put myself in your shoes and feel your despair.

I don't know if I could have done any different at the age of 12 either unfortunately. My opportunity happened only a couple of years ago, but I was still not very comfortable with myself at that stage which is why I didn't go ahead with it. If it came up again, I'm sure I'd be able to do it, but that doesn't seem likely.

My cousin moved 200km away for a while to this small town far away from anywhere. As its a small community, they have a fairly strong sense of community spirit. Every year they hold a celebration (which to most is just an excuse to pub crawl and get drunk from 3pm) but they always have a different theme, and the year I went up there it was "Back to School"

Although I didn't think of it at the time I was preparing my outfit, as the afternoon progressed, we encountered a number of guys in school dresses, plaid skirts, t-bar school shoes, knee high socks, pig-tail wigs, and the like. I kicked myself for the entire evening/night, cuz it would have been so much fun, and I could have totally pulled it off.

A lot of things I have bought since are similar to schoolgirl uniforms. Of course I would have been the only one there wearing lacy white undies too, but no one has to know that

Hope this makes you feel at least a little bit better

<3 Flora

[Guest AllisonD]

Flora

What makes you think you would be the only one there in lingerie? What I have learned here is that there was a very good chance you would not have been alone at all.

Carolyn

I have a very real regret that I could not figure out a way at the tender age of 8, or even 10, to give myself an orchi. I have few regrets in my life, but that is BY FAR the largest, particularly since I was certain at that age that that is what I wanted. Took another 10 years to realize that particular dream.

Allison

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Just a note to you MTF out there. Orchi? "Don't try that at home!' Too much blood - too any veins and ductways to seal off, it requires a surgeon to do it. You can die of blood loss before you get to the hospital.

Don'task how I know - just don't try it.

Lizzy

[Carolyn Marie]

Carolyn

I have a very real regret that I could not figure out a way at the tender age of 8, or even 10, to give myself an orchi. I have few regrets in my life, but that is BY FAR the largest, particularly since I was certain at that age that that is what I wanted. Took another 10 years to realize that particular dream.

Allison

Allison, I learned a new word from you this morning. I had to look it up in a slang dictionary.

Thanks ( I think )

Carolyn

[Carolyn Marie]

Hope this makes you feel at least a little bit better

<3 Flora

Thanks, Flora. It does.

Carolyn

[Guest Emily H]

Now that I think about it more, I do remember, in seventh grade we had to teach our English class how to do something. One girl was teaching how to apply make-up, and really wanted a guy volunteer. Me... I should have volunteered. But some of my really good friends were there, so i didn't' do it.

If only I had, I could know how to do it...

~Steve/Andrea