Compression Shorts Are Awesome!!

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

I remember Lewis mentioning compression shorts (and bike shorts) a while back. Normally I just wear relaxed fit or baggy pants/jeans, so I didn't really worry so much about having "shape" in places I didn't want to.

However, when I was trying on suit pants I found that a little extra padding in the hips and rear became much more problematic. Dress pants are significantly less forgiving than casual pants and jeans. On a whim, I decided to try wearing compression shorts with my suit pants. The result was...awesome. The pants were okay before, but looked WAY better with the compression shorts. Also, I found that it's a lot more obvious if you don't pack when you wear dress pants. The compression shorts were great at keeping everything in place.

Okay...now get ready for this. I was looking around online and found compression shorts that also included a cup pocket. How cool is that?

Here's my question:

I prefer to pack if it's going to be obvious if I don't. However, I'm going to be at a wedding where most people either know I'm trans or remember me as female. Hopefully people won't pay much attention to me. At family functions I tend to fade into the background and keep quiet. Recently I've managed to grow a sparse, pubescent goatee. Do you guys (and girls too) think I should shave it?

Arguments in favor of NOT shaving:

My mom has said she can't imagine me with facial hair. I feel like having facial hair, even if it isn't 100% adult-like, makes her confront the reality that I am a man. It's been really hard to get my family to understand that I am a man and that they should treat me accordingly. The facial hair might not look the greatest, but it makes an important point.

It took me like forever to grow this much hair on my face. I won't have time to grow it all back before the semester starts. Even if it's not the most impressive facial hair, it makes it clear that I am NOT female. Since I have grown it, no undergraduates (or anyone else) has "she'd" me. I'm really worried about my ability to present as unquestionably male when I start teaching again next semester. I know people have said I should wear button down shirts and other more traditionally male attire. Trust me, I can't do that yet. When I have to tuck in my shirt it just broadcasts "female shape". It's horrible.

My brother's facial hair isn't exactly impressive either, but no one would dare suggest he should shave. I have a right to this hair!

To be truthful, the hair isn't all that visible from a distance. It's possible that a lot of people won't notice unless they are talking to me, and it probably won't show up in the wedding pictures anyway.

Arguments in favor of SHAVING:

This is my sister's wedding. It's really not a good place to fight this battle, if that's what it develops into.

All of the older adults (70 and older) in my family prefer the clean shaven look. I'd probably look neater without the scruff.

Even though I'd like it to grow faster, it WILL eventually grow back. It's not like shaving would take it away forever.

My current plan:

I'm going home a couple of days before the wedding. I'll see how much of a fuss (if any) my mom makes about the hair. If she says something, we can talk about it.

Also, if my mom makes my brother shave, then I'll go ahead and do it.

Here's a gratuitous facial hair shot:

Yes, I'm aware it probably looks ridiculous. I don't care. It's my facial hair and I'm happy to have it!

[Guest Pól]

1. Send me the link for the compression shorts? Please?

2. When is the wedding? (i.e. how much time do you have to think about this/ grow more hair?

I think your best option is to show up with the facial hair, so that maybe it'll make your family see what's going on a bit better. If your mum makes you shave it, then she's making you shave your face...and that's kinda neat when you think about it.

I'd vote for clean shaven at the wedding. Besides, your face is pretty masculine looking already and you're gonna be wearing a suit. If they didn't get it before, you're gonna basically be beating it into their heads already, even without the facial hair.

Better to look like sharp, well-dressed man, than some teenage kid who doesn't have enough respect or sense to shave his face.

I got another question for you: are you going to pack at the wedding?

Last thing: get yourself a haircut like 2 weeks before the wedding. From a barber, not yourself in the bathroom with a shaver and a pair of scissors. It'll help you look sharp.

[Guest Elizabeth K]

girl response I guess

It grows back - shave it a couple of days before and let it come back slightly as a stubble,

Someday you won't have to worry - you will just shave and go, anyway. You look masculine enough I think.

Lizzy

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

Pól, I'm sending you that link in just a second. Really. Those compression shorts are a miracle.

The wedding is on August 1st. I'll be heading home on July 30th. There isn't much time to think about facial hair. I'm leaning more toward shaving than not shaving in terms of appearance. It looks better clean shaven. I don't want to look like a grungy teenage boy. Not shaving just to prove a point would also fall into the realm of acting like a teenage boy. Sadly I have long since passed the age where defiant, oppositional behavior is fashionable.

I think I am going to pack at the wedding. It's something I have been debating for a while. When it comes down to it, the pants look better if I pack. The effect is subtle but significant. When I pack, I look like a man. If I don't, the lack of "something" is even more striking and conspicuous. It's kinda like if I don't pack, it invites more attention than if I do. On the other hand, I am certainly not stealth around my family. If someone really wants to scope out my crotchetal region, I guess they'll be surprised. What do you think about the issue? To pack or not to pack?

I'd like to be able to pack with my STP, but I think I won't be able to hide the receptacle end too well when I wear dress pants.

Thanks for the haircut tip. I'm actually planning to get one either tomorrow or Friday, so a little later than is optimal. I'd planned to go Monday but haven't had time. There's a lot of work stuff going on. Much suffering...

Hopefully the lady that cut my hair last time will be around when I go. She's pretty great. I thought about going to a more expensive place, but with men's haircuts, it doesn't make much of a difference where I go.

[Guest Pól]

Ainsley, thanks for the link.

Yeh, if it's so soon, then shave. Go unshaven and then shave when you get there. Or shave right now so that you can have decent stubble when you get there, and then shave that off again.

I was thinking about the packing issue. I don't have a clear thought about it yet, but I'd lean towards packing. Let me think about it a little more, and I'll post again.

If you want to pack with your STP though, I figured out a pretty good way to make that work (even with dress pants). The trick of the thing is to turn it sideways completely. Have the tubing and the receptable run up one of the creases between your leg and your pelvis, and point the tip down one leg like. Also has the advantage of making it sit in a better position when you sit and stand up, without making it look like you've a stiffy. If you keep a pen in your pocket, that can explain the receptacle if anyone brushes up against you and notices it. You pull the pen out of your pocket, and they're like "a ha, so that's what that was."

[Guest NatalieRene]

The more you shave it the quicker it grows. So if you do decide to shave you can comfort yourself in the knowledge that your hair will grow back and slightly faster. Believe it or not there will come a time when you have to shave daily or at least trim it to keep it looking neat.

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

If you want to pack with your STP though, I figured out a pretty good way to make that work (even with dress pants). The trick of the thing is to turn it sideways completely. Have the tubing and the receptable run up one of the creases between your leg and your pelvis, and point the tip down one leg like. Also has the advantage of making it sit in a better position when you sit and stand up, without making it look like you've a stiffy. If you keep a pen in your pocket, that can explain the receptacle if anyone brushes up against you and notices it. You pull the pen out of your pocket, and they're like "a ha, so that's what that was."

You, sir, are very slick. I will indeed carry a pen! That's brilliant!

So, it seems like the verdict is that maybe I should shave now and let the stubble grow until I head home. Even though I know it'll grow back, I still hate shaving it. I think I'll cut it down to the shortest setting with my clippers first. Bye, bye hair. ...for now.

Incidentally, I just went out to get some dress shoes. I hate dress shoes. It feels like the soles are made out of wood or something even less flexible. Finding tolerable shoes took FOREVER...like at least 20 minutes. Eventually I got frustrated and just bought the first pair that didn't feel like my feet were strapped to a trauma board and ready for an ambulance ride.

[Guest NatalieRene]

Thats because the soles in some mens dress shoes are made of wood.

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

Thats because the soles in some mens dress shoes are made of wood.

Then that explains it!

These shoes look pretty awesome.

Shoes of Awesome

[Guest Jackson]

Whoa, Ainsley. I'd like that link for the compression shorts too. I have to dress up every day for work. Those would be great.

Here was I thinking and wondering how is it that I've been on T longer and you've got a full beard. I still can't get much of anything to grow. But don't get me wrong. I'm not complaining. I was not looking forward to facial hair really. So it all works out.

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

Jack, I sent you a link for the compression shorts.

To be clear on the beard issue, it's far from being a full beard. The close up picture makes it look more imposing than it really is. I think it is barely perceptible at distances in excess of 10 feet. To pass as someone my age, I should definitely shave it. However, knowing that I pass 100% of the time as at least a 16 year old male makes me feel so great that I keep the scruffy thing around.

I'm actually pretty frustrated at how long it is taking to get decent facial hair. I really thought I'd be able to at least grow a reasonable goatee by now. I've been on T for 9 months. Apparently there is CONSIDERABLE variability in how quickly beards develop. There are guys who have the ZZ Top thing going on by the time they've been on T for 6 months. Then there are other guys who don't get anything until they've been on T for 2 years. I guess I'm somewhere in between those extremes. I find it odd that I have the amount of chest hair that I have without more beard growth. That's just weird. In the past 2 months my beard development has really accelerated. It's basically quadrupled since May.

When you hear that it takes 2 to 5 years to see the full effects of T, it's no joke.

Tune in next week when we talk about....

my bald spot.

[Guest Quinn]

Hey, if I could grab the link for those compression shorts from you, too, that'd be wicked.

And hah, if I had facial hair like that I'd be a bit reluctant to part with it, too. Still though, like you said, the fact that it is there affirms that if you do shave it, it's not like it won't be returning.

[Guest MrAwesome]

1st of all - compression shorts with cup holder - BAD, I was wearing them today. They don't hold packers in place as good, and when you pull them up over your hips the legs roll up and it's REALLY uncomfortable.

2 - You can buy really nice compression shorts from underworks for shaping, in the FTM section. (just google FTM at underworks) I find that spandex athletic shorts work just fine, and hold you packer in place very well. I normally wear briefs under them, and put the packer in the briefs. (This way if you don't give yourself a wedgie with the spandex, your packer won't move to one side and look like your penis formed wrong.)

3 - You can buy athletic shorts in the Mens section at your local walmart for $10 the compression shorts with the cup holder you van buy in the athletic section, you'll see them with the cups. You can get a cup and the shorts for about $15 is what I paid, but again I don't recommend those...

[Guest MrAwesome]

PS- WALMART has decent dress shoes. I got mine like $20, and they're decently comfortable, no wood what so ever! Lol

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

I can see where the compression shorts with the cup pocket might not work as well. It looks like maybe the pocket isn't as tight as the rest of the shorts.

You must have an awesome Wal-Mart. The one here has no variety in compression shorts. There is one kind and that's it. I don't live in a very big city.

My plan is to perhaps modify the cup pocket a little. I've got two pairs of compression shorts without a pocket and one pair with it. It looks like I'm going to need to sew a line so that the packer doesn't fall to the bottom of the pouch. We'll see. I think different things work with different body types. I haven't had any trouble with the shorts rolling up on me.

[Guest MrAwesome]

No they had the cup and compression shorts thing, just 1 kind, and the spandex shorts in mens section, not a lot of variety =P

[Guest MrAwesome]

oh you'll see you'll see. when you pull them up on your hips, when your out walking the legs roll up. And it's not about it slipping down - It's about shifting. My packer ends up sideways. o.0