Welcome to TGP! I’m thrilled to read that you know who you are and where you’re going. That makes the journey so much more enjoyable. 

Thank you! I thought it fit — not too far one way or the other, just right in the sweet spot 😊.

It was something I looked into there is no evidence but there is some similarities. I know it causes problems in relationships and depression sometimes.

Thanks  thank you for your service   

Thank you I appreciate and thank you for your service 

Thank you it’s nice to meet you too 

Allie I think you are awesome.

My understanding from extensive reading is that we are born with incongruent gender due to hormone changes in utero. These take place at around 12 weeks, so don't seem to have any link to premature birth, which can have a number of external causes. Our brains are hard wired to sense a gender which is different to our sex assigned at birth ( I no longer use the term Gender Identity as it has been weaponised by the anti trans movement) and that conflict causes us discomfort. We, naturally try to ease this discomfort which is a need rather than a want (want is another term weaponised against us!)   Externally, we see that we fit a social role, but internally we have a sense of a different social role, and so feeling like two people is natural. For most of us, attempts to live in our external social role causes stress, and the only proven way to relieve it is to affirm our internal sense. Like many of us, I fought my inner sense for most of my life, but it eventually got on top of me, and I transitioned for my health. You have to do what you have to do, but I wish you every success at finding peace!   Hugs,   Allie

I’m just beginning to seriously wrestle with the me I long to be vs the me I that I have had to express myself as. I feel like I’m constantly flipping between the two, and it’s very disconcerting. And then there seems to be a third me in the middle trying to referee the conflict. 

No need to apologise. My spelling and grammar is awful at the best of times 😂 I didnt even notice haha

Also, I apologise for stupid typos. I know the difference between here and hear really. 

Ah thank you ill give it a go ! Appreciate it 😁

There are a lot.  This is a really basic, easy to do thing...   https://www.lpft.nhs.uk/young-people/lincolnshire/about-us/whats-new/grounding-activity   It's called the 54321 technique. 

No! These sound usefull though ! Anything i can search up or mention to my therapist to try and learn 

Oh, that's interesting.    I was a preemie.    Whatever that adds to / confuses the issue.    (anecdata not being actual data) 

I think most of us relate to the feeling of being two people, though some of us don't express it in those terms.  We were raised and trained to be one gender, yet we feel an affinity for a different one.   I haven't heard of a link between being premature and being trans feminine, but it seems quite plausible to me.  The scientific consensus is that being trans is a result of pre-natal influences, and getting born early would certainly fit in that category.

Sometimes we all need a good wallow!    I hope you know I am here if you need to out loud (by typing) your wallowy thoughts

Oh, sweetheart, I am so sorry about the funeral. I am really busy in London on Thursday, otherwise I would have offered to keep you company.    And I DO know how it is. Try and hold on to the things you know are true, and know that you WILL get out of the other side of this. Do you know techniques to ground yourself (bring yourself back to hear and now and reality? 

Heyy  Sorry ive been wallowing in self pity and anxiety for a week or so, so havent been the best at being there for others on the forums!  Im glad to hear your making some progress 😁

Yes.    I have to allow myself to feel how I feel for NOT speaking. But ALSO to know that it's perfectly OK, and not actually a *problem* to not speak, just I might miss it a little bit.    And absolutely. I am looking forward.    My only concern is I have to get my hair cut in the morning, and then get into town to collect M at 1pm, via also getting marmalade and some lunch for M. And ALL of these things need to happen in a timely fashion, in order to catch the train...