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How Can I Be With God If I Am Transgendered?


Guest Vicky

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How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

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Guest Jean Davis

Hi honey

First you have to remember that we are ALL made in God's image. Do you believe that God could relate to either gender if God was one or the other. I would tend to believe that God is both genders and that perhaps we are closer to God than most because we have a better understanding.

Perhaps it is time to read between the lines and grasp the meaning God is trying to relay. To love, respect and charish all as God would regaurdless of their differences. I think that that would be the message God is trying to say, perhaps that is the reason we are here.

LUV

Jean

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Guest ~Brenda~

Lily, my dearest,

God is Love. This means that God does not discriminate against anyone. I have seen this idea before about God not accepting one who is trangendered. This is a false idea, promoted by man, not God. God accepts all of us, cisgendered and transgendered. You deserve the presence of God in your life as anyone else does.

You accept God. God already accepts you :)

Love

Brenda

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Lily----I so understand and feel what you are saying, and the emotions behind what you write. For me the greatest epiphany came when I realized that God was so much bigger than they ever told me He was. And realizing it was never about me or who I am but about Him and His unconditional love for me. That said I realized we are the meek whom He intended to be the inheritors of His Kingdom---those of us who have nothing to render us deserving of His merit except His love for us. It is so simple and yet so foreign to our human minds to grasp. When the church says the gates of His Kingdom are closed to us, they are soooooo wrong! Don't let anyone speak for God. He can speak for Himself! We--- The Transgendered, are in a position to know His Grace more than anyone else!!

Ricka

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Lily---another thought: What is a clean heart? It is simply a heart without pretense about being anything but who we are, a heart which approaches God with nothing of our own commendation but only because of His invitation and open arms. How often He has told us this---in the Old and New Testaments but still the Church misses this. And His only commandment-- to love one another as He loves us.

Ricka

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How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

Kia Ora Lilym,

Even though personally I have no belief in a god...I've been told on a number of occassions by those who do hold such a belief... "GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES!" so just do what you 'feel' is the right thing to do...In other words if it feels right[and is not physically harming others]then go for it!

Metta Jendar :)

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Thank you very much dear Brenda for telling me that God is Love and He does not discriminate,

and you dear Ricka that His love is unconditional and His grace is more than the way people want to limit.

I am just thinking, if God is really so graceful and loves us as transgender persons, I will be so thanksful to Him forever...I wish i have a revelation about this... , people in the church did already so much damage into my life, tht i don't care about their opinion anyway if they want to close me out. But if He invites me inside the Gates...would be awesome. If He could forgive me and love me as I am, than surely His grace and love is greater than my imagination...

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Lily---another thought: What is a clean heart? It is simply a heart without pretense about being anything but who we are, a heart which approaches God with nothing of our own commendation but only because of His invitation and open arms. How often He has told us this---in the Old and New Testaments but still the Church misses this. And His only commandment-- to love one another as He loves us.

Ricka

Ricka, I think you found what is my other big problem, how can I have clean heart if I am hiding my transgender true-self from the people, eventhough I show and tell the truth to God?

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Kia Ora Lilym,

Even though personally I have no belief in a god...I've been told on a number of occassions by those who do hold such a belief... "GOD HELPS THOSE WHO HELP THEMSELVES!" so just do what you 'feel' is the right thing to do...In other words if it feels right[and is not physically harming others]then go for it!

Metta Jendar :)

Jendar, sweetheart, it feels right to me, because I feel I have to do this, otherwise I am just keeping my true person hiding, but same time I just I need to find my acceptance in front of God if any, and it is a very important issue to me.

Huggs,

Lily

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Guest Sarinah

God made you who you are. Before you were in the womb he knew you and all the days of your life. It is because of who you are that God Loves you. All that god wants from us is our love for him, and an honest heart seeking to love the rest of his creation. Everything else is just life. For God so loved the world that he sent his only son to die on the cross, that all who believes in him will not die but have eternal life. Seek to love God and yourself and all others with all your heart and everything else will fall into place.

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How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

Hi Lily,

You say you are a Christian, if you really are so in your thinking and your every day life then you have no choice in the matter hun, God"s love for you,

our Transsexual Sister is as beautiful as it is for all people, its just not your call hun, the Boss is calling the shots on you. viv.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hello Lily,

I was in the same boat as you for a long time. My knowledge of my gender identity issues went back to when I was three. At 17 I game my life to Jesus, and prayed that the Lord would take the conflict away. It never happened. There was a long history of guilt, cross-dressing and then purge and repentance, but never peace. I tried Christian counseling but the advice was not very helpful and sometimes contradictory.

About three years ago I realized that the unresolved conflict was a big part of my ongoing depression. So I went to Persad, which counsels people with GLBT-related issues. They were very supportive of my faith in God, and understood that my healing needed to incorporate my faith. I also began a personal Bible study to help frame my thoughts as I worked through my issues. In addition, my insisted that we inform a few of our friends from our church so they could pray for the two of us. It was a scary thing to look at this part of me with unblinking eyes after 40+ years. But my first commitment was to the truth, wherever it led me.

I could tell you how I got to where I did another time, but here are some of the things I learned on my journey:

- Everyone is different, so there will not be one answer for everyone. Find a counselor who is respectful of your issues and faith, and work with them. I found the questions my counselor asked were very helpful in focusing my attention on the important things. We can do the same act for very different motivations, and I found that for my peace I needed to look at what was motivating my behavior. This requires a certain amount of brutal honesty. There are genuinely transgendered people and there are some who act transgendered but something else is going on underneath. Peace only comes through the truth. I highly recommend Brendan Manning's book "Abba's Child," which talks about getting at the truth of a believer's brokenness as the path to a deeper relationship with God.

- The fall of man touched everything. We are all broken to some degree. There is no shame in this, it is a condition every person has. I came to believe that my gender dysphoria was a result of the fall, just as my near-sightedness, bad teeth and male-pattern baldness was. It is not "good" for my plumbing to be in conflict with my identity. I rejected the "God doesn't make mistakes." argument; tell that to a person born with CP. This world is filled with people who were dealt a bum hand. It doesn't mean that God doesn't love them. I also think it's absurd to insist that the perishable, our bodies somehow automatically takes precedence over the immortal—our souls. So what you and I deal with is extraordinary not because of the Lord, but because our society is so uncomfortable with it. In some societies people like us would be seen as peacemakers and mediators, because we have one foot in each gender.

- The fruit of the Spirit is not different for TG believers. Our lives are to be marked by love, patience, long suffering, humility, service, grace, and all the aspects of a mature believer. Our condition does not exempt us. I had to bite my tongue as my church prayer support let their fears rather than their knowledge of who I am guide their thoughts. I almost lost them as friends, I was so hurt. But Christ calls us to forgive, and I now understand the limits of what they can deal with. Christians do not angrily demand their rights, but treat each other as better than themselves. We are enjoined not to let our behavior be a stumbling block for others. For you, the answer may be a different church. A new support system.

- Lastly, the Lord loves you, and He wants to se you set free. I don't know what freedom looks like for you, but always remember that the Lord convicts us, which leads to repentance and action. The enemy of or souls uses guilt, which paralyzes us into inaction and worthlessness. I had to get to the point where I was willing to follow the Lord in whatever direction He led, even if it meant the end of my marriage or the end of my cross dressing. He loves you. He loves you. He loves you with a love so intense it can be scary. Rest in Him first. Obey his word. Bravely test the truth. Act in faith. You will find your home at the end.

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Guest julia_d

Completely irrelevant subject.. The question really is "Can you accept yourself"??

If you can answer yes to that question then whatever spirituality you have will just have to be comfortable with it. The only person we ultimately answer to is ourself.

Ever heard of the weighing of the heart against the feather of truth?

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  • 1 month later...
Guest Chandra

I feel we are all gods children.

male , female it matters not in the big scheme of things. We are all humane.

It is how we live our lives that count , not the clothing on our skin.

Love Chandra

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Guest DisDwarf

The New Testament says: "Judge not according to the appearance, but judge righteous judgment." (John 7:24)

This is a command from Jesus telling people not to judge transgender people or anyone else by their body, but examine their soul. If you believe you have truly understood what gender your soul is, then other people must accept you with that gender when you tell them who you are, because Jesus says we must not judge according to mere appearance.

Churches that use the Bible to comdemn transgender people just misinterpret the Bible. Find a church that is LGBTQI-affirming and welcomes transgender people.

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  • 3 weeks later...
Guest Katrina Reann

I too once struggled with shame and guilt because of religious beliefs. But there is a big difference between mainstream religion and God. There are many things that mainstream religion does not accept and preaches against. And they use the Bible as a two by four to smack people in the head. And they take no scientific evidence into consideration. Now I believe was inspired by God but I also believe our Faith in God needs to be balanced with science in many situations such as ours. In other words we shouldn't be so earthly minded that we are no Heavenly good and neither should we be so Heavenly minded that we are no earthly good.

After many years of inner struggle with the shame and guilt of who I am and whether God accepts us this way I simply accepted the fact that God made me this way. And if He made me this way He must have accept it long before I was born. I got tired of the religious game playing and don't attend church the way I used or probably should. But attendance isn't what save us anyway. What saves us is the love of God and the sacrifice His Son made on the cross. He knows we are imperfect beings (meaning everyone0 and that their is many things that go into what makes us us. And He allowed us all to be individuals. I believe when our time comes and we stand before God's judgment throne he will take ALL evidence into consideration along with how we have lived the life He gave us. I don't think we are meant to know everything, overcome everything, or be perfect in every way. That would be defeating the purpose of Christ being born, crucified, and resurrected. I truly believe He wants us to be who we truly are with out shame. And regardless of gender or race as long as we have good morals and have accepted His Son into our hearts we will make it to Heaven regardless of what mainstream religion teaches. And I think many religious people who have been so judgmental will be surprised either at the judgment throne or when they get to Heaven. Because I truly believe there will be a lot of their so called unwanted's will be there.

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Guest Roberta1

IMHO:

One must remember that the Bible may have been inspired by God, but was, none-the-less, written by man, then edited by man.

then all the books were scrutinized and voted upon for inclusion into or exclusion from the Bible, and finally a English King had the last say!

Well, if this is so, then one has to read and interpret the words in the context of when they were written. Finally, God, being a loving God,

the Bible, being a book written by man, plus the fact that God gave man the right to freewill (point to come) How could any thing that

happens on earth be considered against God? The only factor is that we rely too much on others [men] to set the norm, ie: what is

acceptable, and what is not. If it is said enough times, then black becomes white. Undoubtedly, much of what is in the Bible is based on

[oral] history. But There are also stories that may be there solely to teach a moral lesson, and possibly were stretched out a bit to improve

the drama around the campfire.

Sincerely,

Roberta

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Guest Katrina Reann
IMHO:

One must remember that the Bible may have been inspired by God, but was, none-the-less, written by man, then edited by man.

then all the books were scrutinized and voted upon for inclusion into or exclusion from the Bible, and finally a English King had the last say!

Well, if this is so, then one has to read and interpret the words in the context of when they were written. Finally, God, being a loving God,

the Bible, being a book written by man, plus the fact that God gave man the right to freewill (point to come) How could any thing that

happens on earth be considered against God? The only factor is that we rely too much on others [men] to set the norm, ie: what is

acceptable, and what is not. If it is said enough times, then black becomes white. Undoubtedly, much of what is in the Bible is based on

[oral] history. But There are also stories that may be there solely to teach a moral lesson, and possibly were stretched out a bit to improve

the drama around the campfire.

Sincerely,

Roberta

Finally!!! Someone who views the bible as I do. I could not have said it better. God is the one with the power and He still has a voice today that can and does inspire many.ty Roberta...Huggsss

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  • 3 months later...
  • Forum Moderator

When I was a small child the only person in my life who loved and accepted me once told me that if I was still and listened I could fell and know God in my heart and would always know what was right. And for me that has been true.

When I was 5, I was told anyone not a member of our church was going to hell. I stood up right in the middle of Sunday School and shouted "God's not like that and you'll never make me believe it" and stormed out. My great-uncle was an elder in the church and the consequences were severe but I never regretted it. I still feel that way

For me God is too much to be limited and boxed in by the mind of mankind. We just can't grasp it. I have really struggled with the idea at times that I can't understand or define God but I can feel the flow and presence of God. . I believe that the bible is a guide but it wasn't intended to be used to limit God- rather to guide us and get us to thinking. I have heard the same verses quoted in different denominations to condemn each other as wrong. And if we go literally there are some verses-such as the ones about divorce or dietary restrictions that you don't hear quoted now. You can't say the bible is literal and actually true and the turn around and ignore parts that are inconvenient. Not only has it been in the hands of man and subject to all of the flaws of man but as a guide it hasn't been allowed to change as society and conditions change. The truths about love and prayer don't change. Much of human nature hasn't changed so much of the bible is still relevant but I don't think all of it is.

Besides when I read some passages my heart still shouts "God isn't like that and you'll never make me believe it" My God is in my heart and I know that I am loved and accepted there.

God created me this way so I know it's alright.

And there is so much love and comfort and good in this site that I can't doubt the presence of God

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Guest NatalieRene
How can I find God and myself as a Christian if I am transgendered? I have been a Christian for about 15 years, and I had a lot to do with the church before. I was interpreter, bible school teacher and very active in the church for many years. I also saw a lot of good things and a lot of really bad things happening in the church. I am now disgusted of the people in the church. Now I live in a different country, different town, going to a different church, if ever I am going, because I am not going now because I have the inner conflict that I am a woman, but outside I am a man. And if God created me as a man, then why I want to be a woman so much, why my behaviur is not "mannish", why I am so sensitive like a woman? Can God accept me? Even I find in the Bible that man should not dress into woman's dress. So why I have the desire to do this since my early teen age, and why I am a woman inside? And since I found my true-self my sexual behaviour is way much better than before. But how can I sing a song to Him or pray to Him with a clean heart, if I don't know if he is okey with me like this? I know that God loves so much everybody, but inside me, I feel so guilty. And I can not hide this from Him, he knows it all. I am very confused. Somebody can help?

Lily,

God doesn't care about the flesh. He cares about your soul. He cares about who you are and how you have conducted yourself.

Are you a man? Having male plumbing doesn't make you a man. Besides you also have to keep in mind that the bible although the word of God was still written through a mans hand. Some of mans prejudices could have slipped in during the interpretation.

God accepts everyone who accepts him, Jesus made that quite clear. Don't let anyone tell you differently. God loves you. He didn't make a mistake making you but that doesn't mean that you're diverging from his plan. It's likely that we're meant to learn something from our time on earth walking a mile in someone else's shoes.

If your current church can't accept accept you, that is them not God and you should find another church.

Be strong

Natalie

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Guest TinaLynn

the biggest thing i have trouble with is that as a child growing up i was told a story that soon after

i was born my great unt a very spiritual lady and a prayer warior was reading the bible and praying about what

my family never said but as she finshed praying the bible open the book of Timothy and from what i gathereed

she knew that was the name i was to have.

troubling thing is if i'm to live as i feel i 'm from the inside out then by chasnging my name ,,,,,,wouldn't that

a slap in god's face???????

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Guest Hoslers_wife

I have also fought with this for years. I was raised Baptist and struggled with what that meant for me as a lesbian. After years of struggling I came to the conclusion that his loves me, gay/straight/whatever. My husband is transgendered and we feel like its a double no no. Me gay, him transgered but at the end of the day we love and respect people, the earth, and our god. Were good people with caring hearts. We are gods children. He made us this way.

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Guest Girl Emily

This was a burden that played heavily in my guilt and shame that I carried for to long. There are verses in the Bible that praise God for his care and knowledge of our being while we were still developing in our mother's womb. We are not mistakes. The world is mistaken. God does not see and judge as man does. He knows an judges on what's inside and what you have done with what you were given. Paul lists many of the gifts of the Spirit, but he doesn't claim to list them all. God is infinite in His wisdom, His creativity, His understanding, His compassion, His love. We that are trans have been given a wonderful opportunity to live life in both genders. That is just awesome in itself. We have been given a rare gift in a time when God's medical science can give what was never possible before now, how blessed are we? We that are Christian need to boldly say in a loving manner the church is wrong in its position against us as they were wrong about Galileo who is perhaps the man responsible for modern science. "Saul. Saul why do you persecute me?" Should be our battle hymn as we go into battle against those of whom are against us. I went to church twice in the last week and as the congregation whose national leaders called me a sexual deviant akin to pedaphiles I sang How Great Thou Art with a clean conscious until I was brought to tears as I tried miserably to maintain my composure. We need to stop living in fear of the radical or even mainstream Christians and call them to account for the suffering we have all suffered and continue to suffer because of their misguided and blind position against us for it is from the pit of hell itself that it originates. Satan has enlisted neophyte Christians who have been put in position of leadership over the church to attack us because our gift can be a powerfully used weapon of healing to people in and outside the church.

We have been given much and much is expected of us will we live up to our potential our obligation to make the way safe for our followers is yet to be decided.

In His Name

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Guest Genie
the biggest thing i have trouble with is that as a child growing up i was told a story that soon after

i was born my great unt a very spiritual lady and a prayer warior was reading the bible and praying about what

my family never said but as she finshed praying the bible open the book of Timothy and from what i gathereed

she knew that was the name i was to have.

troubling thing is if i'm to live as i feel i 'm from the inside out then by chasnging my name ,,,,,,wouldn't that

a slap in god's face???????

Don't worry about name changing, hon. God has been in the name changing business for a very long time. I suggest you get an answer from him rather than getting it second hand from other people.

"Saul. Saul why do you persecute me?" Should be our battle hymn as we go into battle against those of whom are against us. I went to church twice in the last week and as the congregation whose national leaders called me a sexual deviant akin to pedaphiles I sang How Great Thou Art with a clean conscious until I was brought to tears as I tried miserably to maintain my composure. We need to stop living in fear of the radical or even mainstream Christians and call them to account for the suffering we have all suffered and continue to suffer because of their misguided and blind position against us for it is from the pit of hell itself that it originates. Satan has enlisted neophyte Christians who have been put in position of leadership over the church to attack us because our gift can be a powerfully used weapon of healing to people in and outside the church.

We have been given much and much is expected of us will we live up to our potential our obligation to make the way safe for our followers is yet to be decided.

In His Name

The huge problem with people and transgenderism/transsexualism is, unfortunately, ignorance. When people see one person who happens to he a pedophile, prostitute or a felon, oh how often do they attribute that to everyone in the category. Does that sound familiar? It's stereotyping, which is very common in racism and sexism (especially in New York). It's a little saddening. I am counting on Christian leaders to set a good example in there position to others (like the youth). We all fall into sin, but we are to repent, not continuing to slandering one another.

The description you provided is exactly what modern Pharisees are. While some may hold positions of power, the majority are every day people that are very self-righteous. Not all of mainstream and radical Christians are like this though. 90% of United States citizens affiliate being Christian, but only 10% of them are actually affected at all by Christian theology (if you want the research PM me for them).

Truly I tell you, I live in a fallen world with the vast majority that are autosoteric.

Love,

Genie

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  • 1 month later...
Guest Kimberly S

Hello Lily

I am very young(18 years) but here is how I understand it

In the bible which I believe to be the literal Word of God, in the Old Testament it says a man should not wear women's clothing and a woman not wear a man's, but in the old testament there's 600+ other laws, does that mean we have to follow all of them? Well, yes, it does actually, since Jesus said so himself in the New Testament(forgot where). But Jesus also said:

"'I tell you the truth, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God' When the disciples heard this they were astonished and asked, 'Who then can be saved?' Jesus looked at them and said, 'With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible'"(Matthew 19:23-26). Now I like to take a moment to let those last couple words sink in: "WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE" It gives me goosebumps honestly, think of all those 'religious' people who have judged you in the past, none of them come close to the glory of God, they are human just like you and me.

Another one that I like is Matthew 21:31-32(Spoken by Jesus to the CHIEF PRIESTS OF THE TEMPLE!)'I tell you the truth, the tax collectors and prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you. For John came to you to show you the way of righteousness, and you did not believe him, but the tax collectors and prostitutes did. And even after you saw this, you did not repent and believe in him.' Now I'm sure you already knew this, but prostitutes and tax collectors were considered very naughty people back in the day ;) And yet Jesus said they were saved, because they knew they had sinned and they asked forgiveness from God, the only one who can give it.

For more inspiring verses from the Son of God himself, just read the four gospels, they're called the GOOD NEWS for a reason! :)

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    • MaeBe
      1.  I think there are some legitimate concern.   2. Thoroughly discussing this will consume many threads.   3. I disagree partially with @MaeBe but there is partial agreement.   4. The context includes what is happening in society that the authors are observing.  It is not an isolated document.   The observation is through a certain lens, because people do things differently doesn't mean they're doing it wrong. Honestly, a lot of the conservative rhetoric is morphing desires of people to be treated with respect and social equity to be tantamount to the absolution of the family, heterosexuality, etc. Also, being quiet and trying to blend in doesn't change anything. Show me a social change that benefits a minority or marginalized group that didn't need to be loud.   5. Trump, if elected, is as likely to spend his energies going after political opponents as he is to implementing something like this.   Trump will appoint people to do this, like Roger Severino (who was appointed before, who has a record of anti-LGBTQ+ actions), he need not do anything beyond this. His people are ready to push this agenda forward. While the conservative right rails about bureaucracy, they intend to weaponize it. There is no question. They don't want to simplify government, they simply want to fire everyone and bring in conservative "warriors" (their rhetoric). Does America survive 4 year cycles of purge/cronyism?   6. I reject critical theory, which is based on Marxism.  Marxism has never worked and never will.  Critical theory has problems which would need time to go into, which I do not have.   OK, but this seems like every other time CRT comes up with conservatives...completely out of the blue. I think it's reference is mostly just to spark outrage from the base. Definitely food thought for a different thread, though.   7. There are groups who have declared war on the nuclear family as problematically patriarchal, and a lot of other terms. They are easy to find on the internet.  This document is reacting to that (see #4 above).   What is the war on the nuclear family? I searched online and couldn't find much other than reasons why people aren't getting married as much or having kids (that wasn't a propaganda from Heritage or opinions pieces from the right that paint with really broad strokes). Easy things to see: the upward mobility and agency of women, the massive cost of rearing children, general negative attitudes about the future, male insecurity, etc. None of this equates to a war on the nuclear family, but I guess if you look at it as "men should be breadwinners and women must get married for financial support and extend the male family line (and to promote "National Greatness") I could see the decline of marriage as a sign of the collapse of a titled system and, if I was a beneficiary of that system or believe that to NOT be tilted, be aggrieved.   8.  Much of this would have to be legislated, and this is a policy documented.  Implementation would  be most likely different, but that does not mean criticism is unwarranted.   "It might be different if you just give it a chance", unlike all the other legislation that's out there targeting LGBTQ+ from the right, these are going to be different? First it will be trans rights, then it will be gay marriage, and then what? Women's suffrage?   I get it, we may have different compasses, but it's not hard to see that there's no place for queer people in the conservative worldview. There seems to be a consistent insistence that "America was and is no longer Great", as if the 1950s were the pinnacle of society, completely ignoring how great America still is and can continue to be--without having to regress society to the low standards of its patriarchal yesteryears.    
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Cadillac parts are pretty expensive, so repairing them costs more.  But they don't seem to break down more than other makes.  Lots of Lincoln models use Ford cars as a base, so you can get parts that aren't much more expensive.    My family has had good luck with "Panther platform" cars.  Ford Crown Victoria, Mercury Marquis, Lincoln Towncar or Continental.  4.6 V8 and 5.0 V8.  Reasonable fuel economy, and fairly durable.  Our county sheriff's office was running Chargers and SUV's for a while, but has gone back to older Crown Victorias for ease of maintenance.  GF rebuilds them here.  But they are getting more scarce, since the newest ones were made in 2011.    1992-1997 years were different than the later years.  1998-2001 they did some changes, and apparently the best years are 2003 to 2011.  Check Craigslist, and also government auctions.  GF has gotten a lot of them at auction, and they can be had in rough-but-running shape for around $1,000.  Ones in great shape can be found in the $5,000+ range.  Good for 200,000 miles without significant rebuilding.  Go through engine and transmission and electrical systems, and they go half a million.    Some Chrysler models are OK.  The 300 mostly has the same engines as the Charger and Challenger, so parts availability is pretty good.  But they tend to get timing issues.  The older Chrysler Sebring convertibles were pretty reliable, sometimes going 200,000 miles without tons of problems, although after that they were pretty much worn out. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I think I have read everything the Southern Baptists have to say on transgender, and it helped convince me they are dead wrong on these issues.  They can be nice people.  I would never join an SBC church.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You come across as a thoughtful, sweet, interesting and pleasant person.    There are parts of this country, and more so the world, where evangelicals experience a great deal of finger wagging.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      It has been an interesting experience being in a marriage in a Christian faith community, yet being intersex/trans.  I stay pretty quiet, and most have kind of accepted that I'm just the strange, harmless exception.  "Oh, that's just Jen.  Jen is...different."  I define success as being a person most folks just overlook. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, I live in an area with a lot of Southern Baptists, Evangelicals, etc...  We've experienced our share of finger-wagging, as the "standard interpretation" of Scripture in the USA is that the Bible only approves of "one man, one woman" marriage.  My faith community is mostly accepted here, but that has taken time and effort.  It can be tough at times to continue to engage with culture and the broader population, and avoid the temptation to huddle up behind walls like a cult.    Tolerance only goes so far.  At one point, my husband was asked to run for sheriff.  He declined, partly because an elected official with four wives would have a REALLY tough time.  (Of course, making way less than his current salary wasn't an option either). 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      My bone structure is far more female than male.  I can't throw like a guy, which has been observed by guys numerous times, and moving like a woman is more natural.  It just is.  I'm not going out of my way to act in a fem. way, as you say, but I am letting go of some of the 'I am not going to move like that because I am a guy' stuff I have defensively developed.  The other breaks through anyway - there were numerous looks from people at work when I would use gestures that are forbidden to men, or say something spontaneously no guy would ever say.   At one point, maybe a year or more ago, I said it was unfair for people to think they were dealing with a man when they were actually dealing with a woman.    Girl here.  'What is a woman' is a topic for another day.
    • Willow
      Mom, I’m home!  What’s for lunch?   Leftover pizza .   ok.    Not exactly our conversation but there is truth in the answer.     @KymmieLsorry you are sick. Feel better soon.   Girl mode, boy mode no mode, not us. Nothing functional for either of us.   anyone here have or had a 10 year old (plus or minus) Caddy, Lincoln or Chrysler?  How was it?  Lots of repairs?  Comfortable seats? Anything positive or negative about it?  I need to replace my 2004 Ford Explorer Eddie Bauer, it’s eating $100 dollar bills and needs a couple of thousand dollars worth of work and that doesn’t even fix the check engine code.  Obviously, it isn’t worth putting that kind of money into a 20 year old car with a 174 thousand miles.   Willow
    • Ashley0616
      Oversized pink shirt, pink and black sports bra
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I think you mean the worst possible interpretation of 2025 situation.  Keep in mind that there are those who will distort and downright lie about anything coming from conservatives - I have seen it time and time again.  It's one of the reasons I want to read the thing slowly and carefully.  They want you to be very, very afraid. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Here is where the expectation is that the stereotypical evangelical comes in finger wagging, disapproving and condemning.    Not gonna do that.   You have to work these things out.  Transgender issues put a whole different spin on everything and God understands what we are going through. I have enough trouble over here.  :)
    • Ivy
      You do you. You seem to be in a safe place if we end up with a 2025 situation.  But a lot of us are not.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, my marriage is different.  I'm actually part of a multi-partner marriage.  Like you see in the Book of Genesis.  My husband has four wives...and me.  I was kind of an accident, as our community sets the "reasonable maximum" at four wives, but that's a long story.  Plural marriage is approved in my faith community, with the exception of spiritual leaders, as described in 1 Timothy 3.  We believe that anything that isn't specifically prohibited is permitted.    The purpose of marriage is for people to work together, demonstrate the love of God, and to have children.  My faith believes in exponential reproduction - big families with lots of kids, both as a blessing and with the intention of using the size of our population for political ends.  Being intersex/trans and unable to bear children, I wouldn't have been a good candidate to be somebody's only spouse (the majority of our community tends toward traditional couple marriage).  Since my husband has other partners, I don't have to worry about the childbearing aspect, and I help out with raising our family's kids.  I'm a "bonus parent."    I'm not 100% open about my intersex/trans nature, although my community's leaders are aware of me.  Being transgender isn't condemned, but it is seen as a health problem derived from an imperfect, fallen world and an environment polluted with chemicals.  Since I'm married, I have a safe place to be, and I can live how I need to live.    I firmly believe the advice given in 1 Corinthians 7.  We don't totally own our bodies.  God gets a say, as I believe He created us to be male or female, not something outside the binary.  I don't think that transition without discussion with partners is OK....again, we don't totally own ourselves.  When I started to figure myself out, that was actually the main thing on my mind - will my partners accept me?  How will my position in the family change?  Since my partners don't really have a problem with the mild version of transition that I wanted to do, it has all been good. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Indeed.  While it seems like the majority of LGBTQ+ folks vote for Democrat candidates, not everybody drinks the Kool-Aid.  I'm a registered Independent, since I vote for individuals rather than party.  One of my trans friends is very pro-Trump - wears her MAGA hat and everything.  I find it interesting to see the reactions she gets... folks aren't always as tolerant as they claim to be.  Even on this forum, you get some real flak from Democrat voters....many will insist that the California way is the only way.    In my opinion, "Project 2025" isn't the real problem.  Check out UN "Agenda 2030."   
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      While Biden may be more friendly to trans folks, I'm not a single-issue voter.  I just can't choose a Democrat candidate, as I believe their actions will destroy my community and way of life.  Biden just announced that he wants to significantly increase capital gains taxes.  Maybe he intends to "tax the rich" but that is going to affect everything from land sales to grocery prices to the cost of electricity and even folks' retirement savings, as most companies make a large amount of their profits through investing in the market.  It is absolute lunacy to think that increased cost or reduced profits won't be passed on to the rest of us.  Things are going to get way worse at this rate.    Mostly, I vote in elections for state and local issues, as the national government is about as pleasant as a Porta-Potty in July.  So, either I'll do a write-in vote for president, or I'll check the box for Trump.  Anything but Biden.     
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