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The Story Of How I Knew.


Guest CJ Robinson

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Guest CJ Robinson

Growing up I always felt more like a boy than a girl, following my older brother around like he was my idol. Trying to join the boy scouts because he was it in. Having guys friends WAY before I made friends with any girls, always willing to play the husband when playing house, chasing after girls more than I did the boys because I considered the boys my buddies. Dressing like a boy, acting like a boy, walking like a boy (unless my mom focused me into a dress or skirt). Trying to copy my brother when I was around six years old and stand up and pee like him. Finding out from my parents I was supposed to be born a male (but I’m not sure if that’s true or not). Finding out that I actually have very high testosterone levels because of my dad. But of course as I grew older, I slowly grew out of it or so I thought I did, because I still continued to be a tomboy and around 10th grade those urges of wanting to be a boy, getting rid of my chest, and possibly having a deeper voice returned. It wasn’t until August of last year that I began to identify as genderqueer (feeling as though I was both a female AND male)… If anything, I have come to the realization I am a transmasculine trans guy, and I know I still have to see a gender therapist, but I am 100% sure now this is who I am, who I've always been, and I'm proud of that.

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Guest Lacey Lynne

Awesome, man. Great story. Yeah, it's about time to see a gender therapist. You'd be surprised: There are lots of transguys. I've met a few in person and a few online and really like them all. They've got it together and are smart and independent. What's not to like?

You'll like it here. Read. Post. Enjoy.

Lacey

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Guest CariadsCarrot

Thanks for sharing your story with us CJ. I 'grew out of it' (into a few years of denial and trying to be what I was supposed to be) too and am only really coming back to the reality now at the age of 32. I'm glad you've come back round to a place of accepting who you are again now and it's awesome that you can be proud of that. It can be a long tough journey to the point where you can say 'I am me and I'm proud of that' but it's so precious. I hope a gender therapist will help you even more with that.

I'm not there yet but I will be some day.

Good to have the chance to get to know you that little bit more mate.

Gabe

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Guest CJ Robinson

I hope to get a gender therapist over the summer if I possibly can. My girlfriend is trying to help with that too, she's planning on buying me a binder and she made me a bow tie for prom which is tomorrow. We're going together. Unfortunately, I have to wear a dress but you know what? I'm going to be the sexist man in a dress and heels that anyone has ever seen! I'm glad that I finally wrote my story out even though it was written short. Although, it helped me a great deal. It's a nice feeling to stop being in denial of who I am and accept the fact that this is who I was all along, and as hard as it was, I've made it.

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Guest miss kindheart

Hi CJ,

<<< curtsey >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules. :)

We have FTM meetings -Mon & Fri 8pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

:wub: vanna

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Guest CariadsCarrot

I hope you have an awesome time at the prom. It sux having to wear a dress for stuff like that but I like your attitude on it. I'm glad you get to go with your girlfriend.

I'm glad writing your story out helped.

Gabe

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  • 5 months later...

Hello CJ,

I really admire your story and the fact that even without seeing a Gender Therapist, you know who you are and to be proud of that and I can feel some of your confidence oozing into my life.

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  • 3 months later...
Guest LMTaylor

Hi CJ,

I can't believe the school is forcing you to wear a dress! I mean, it's 2012 here... When will people stop trying to make everyone fit into a nice, neat, little box?

I yield my soapbox...

Lisa

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Guest Gregg Jameson

HI CJ!

Welcome!

Glad you are going to the prom with your girlfriend, that sounds exciting!

Sorry you are having to wear attire not fitting your gender. I, too, am surprised there isn't a way around that for you.

However, I admire your plans to attend anyway, as well as admire your girlfriend, too.

Enjoy the prom!

Brad

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