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Guest Kendra K

Hard time of the year: Summer

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Guest Kendra K

In my chosen geographical location the weather is getting warmer, we're approaching summer. It's nice, but that's also the hardest time of the year for me emotionally.

Driving past the pools, past the rivers, I get reminded how I'd rather be wearing a bikini or a one piece than wearing trunks.

Going to events, I get reminded that I'd rather be wearing a dress or a skirt, than wear a suit (well, actually I refuse to wear that, I still would rather not be wearing polos).

I'd immagine for MTF, especially the more girly MTFs, summer is the hardest time of the year, because that's when you really see the differences between the sexes. In winter you'll see the women wearing more pants than the summer and you certainly don't see the swimwear out and about (At least in the snow climates anyhow ;))

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Guest Amelia

Yeah that's totally how I feel. It's at least reassuring to think about how good you will feel after your transition, when you can finally wear bikinis, skirts, and dresses (Yay dresses)!

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VickySGV

Being far to the southwest (darn near in the Pacific Ocean) where the winter bundle up is not quite as marked, it can still be rough on you before you learn how to be yourself in public. It has taken me (too many) years to get from where you are to where I am today, but the journey is composed of equal parts wishing, and doing. First thing to do is put aside the notion that you cannot do those things, the next is to find the ways you can. There are ways, there really are.

There are GLBT centers that sponsor "Outings" during the summer which are parties where you can wear the clothing you desire. A neighboring state (Illinois) has one of the premier Transgender Conferences in June, and I know some "survivors" (JK) of their pool parties who had a blast. Find or develop a support group with friends who will accept you as you are, and with whom you can find safe places to be you!! It all can be done! Get going on it, I don't know your way, in fact I can't even really tell you how I have done it. Make the proverbial "Mid Summer's Night Dream" your own in all its beauty, the calendar says spring is still a few days off, but summer follows quickly.

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Guest LauraJen

I'd immagine for MTF, especially the more girly MTFs, summer is the hardest time of the year, because that's when you really see the differences between the sexes. In winter you'll see the women wearing more pants than the summer and you certainly don't see the swimwear out and about (At least in the snow climates anyhow ;))

I'm totally there on that - I am very high up on the scale of femininity and really do feel the pain during hot weather. It was a nice day here yesterday and here in the UK the climate is very unpredictable. So when you get a hot day outside of the summer, people really make the most of it. I'd much rather don a floaty sun dress but have to keep covered up in andro-male clothes, while groups of girls go round wearing whatever they like having a blast and it really does feel like it's being rubbed in your face all the time.

Let's not forget what the guys have to go through, as well. They have to put up with binding in hot weather - the only alternative is layering, which I imagine is even worse.

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Guest LauraJen

Going to events, I get reminded that I'd rather be wearing a dress or a skirt, than wear a suit (well, actually I refuse to wear that, I still would rather not be wearing polos).

I'm a uni student and it being spring now means one thing -formal dances. There are some coming up at the moment and i remember last year reading announcements of tickets going on sale actually almost made me upset. I'd love to go out shopping around for the perfect dress for it, but know that that's not possible and I'd have to go wearing a tuxedo or a dinner jacket suit if I was to go, so I choose the lesser of two evils and miss out. But I still can't help but feel I'm missing out on a lot, just for the sake of being trans :-(

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Guest Elizabeth K

We generally have summer most of the year in New Orleans. It is 86 degrees right now. So we wear summer clothes almost year around. We did not have a freeze this year, for example. WARM

But we three have transitioned, so it's just fine being out as ourselves. I suggest don't compare yourself with other girls or other women. I can't wear a bikini, but at age 64 I don't think I ever will need to (cringe) - but I am looking forward to wearing a two piece after my surgery. The last two summers I wore a single piece swinsuit with a skirt type bottom.

But summer - the super hot part? NICE! Hair in a pony - minimal make up - shorts, low cut top - sandals or bare footed. SAUCY wench on the move!

Lizzy

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Guest Clair Dufour

Besides Convetions that Vicky mentioned, most large beaches have an area where all the LGBT go and are usualy left alone. Also, LGBT tourism is a huge industry for many reasons. There are many resorts even in the north, there are tours to popular tourist destinations again with friendly venues. I imagine that some trans groups plan trips to such places. Which brings up the point Liz made, there is strength in numbers, don't do such things alone in places that are not safe.

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Guest Talon

Yeah really sucks for FTMs too! That time of year when you wanna go shirtless so bad! No fun... :(

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Guest Lizzie McTrucker

Hey now, some of us girls dread summer too. First, I am a big girl so I hate bathing suit season because I can never find a suit that's flattering. Secondly, since summer is approaching that means I'm going to have to start shaving regularly. At least during winter I could get away with not shaving every couple days. Shaving your legs regularly is a royal pain. Once in awhile, it's tolerable. Every day or every couple days it's annoying and time consuming. Third, summer heat = sweat = makeup that starts running. That's never pretty. I'll take colder weather over that.

..and when you're cold, you can always layer clothes to get warmer. When you're hot, you can only take off so much before you get arrested for indecent exposure.

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Guest Kendra K

Yeah really sucks for FTMs too! That time of year when you wanna go shirtless so bad! No fun... :(

I didn't think of that. That stinks as well. :(

I'm totally there on that - I am very high up on the scale of femininity and really do feel the pain during hot weather. It was a nice day here yesterday and here in the UK the climate is very unpredictable. So when you get a hot day outside of the summer, people really make the most of it. I'd much rather don a floaty sun dress but have to keep covered up in andro-male clothes, while groups of girls go round wearing whatever they like having a blast and it really does feel like it's being rubbed in your face all the time.

Let's not forget what the guys have to go through, as well. They have to put up with binding in hot weather - the only alternative is layering, which I imagine is even worse.

Good point about the binding. Yep about the sun dress. I swear my whole summer is about wishing for sun dresses and bikinis.

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JJ

Summer was always kind of hard that way-always so wanted to wear just cutoffs and nothing else to putter around the yard-lived in the country most of my life so it would have been fine had I been a guy. And while I love swimming I always felt so covered up somehow in a suit. As a kid I always snuck out to our big stock tank/ pool (Like a really huge swimming pool and made to swim & irrigate . Half a block long and wide) in just my shorts till we developed the land as a housing addition. Then I was stuck with girl suits at the country club. Yuck. Swimming is a passion and that was the fly in the ointment.

Now I have to cover up even more with a compression shirt and rash guard as well as board shorts :) And then there is wearing a binder in an Arkansas summer. Binders are almost all at least 2 layer , then you add a shirt over that. Always high humidity here in the summer-80-90% -and frequently temps well over 100. That extra layer is almost as unendurable as not binding. Almost.

So no. Summer is not the season of light clothes and fun in the sun I so wish it could be. And it makes me more dysphoric because that covering up is the opposite of what feels right.

Johnny

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Guest mistygirl7

It the same for me just a little different I'm capable of wearing a bikini after being being on her for a while but my body weight itself is not ready yet.

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Kyla666

Yeah... i am having the same problem this year.. My Girlfriend LOVES to swim but i told her i'll never take my top off again EVER! And a swimsuit is out of the question right now.... Not till about summer 2014 :doh1: I keep wanting to buy a swimsuit but then i am like "what's the point"

I kind of want a Swimsuit for when we go to Vegas, As our plan is that i dress full time when we are there " I Hope to have a Few lasers done before going"

But the question comes up If i will pass with no makeup on... And pushup bra etc etc :dunno: I do have very long hair now but even that may not help.

So most likely i'll skip swimming till i am on HRT a few years :mellow:

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Guest Janice Lynn

Kendra, summer is the most frustrating time of the year for me as well.

During the winter, spring, and fall I never go a day without wearing a

bra and pantieseven to work, because here in the Northwest wearing

layers of clothing make it possible to feel feminine even if I do not

appear so. The risks of unexpected or unwanted discovery is minimal,

so I keep my arms and legs and torso free of hair, wear polish on my

toes, and style my hair in male fashion for the day and redo it when I

am at home here in the country. No one can surprise us and we know

someone is coming when they are half a mile away on a gravel road.

Until or if ever I come out completely summer means being reminded

on a daily basis that ironically I must put Janice under wraps at the very

time I would like to celebrate the glory of summertime in the same way

ciswomen do.

Instead the bra stays off .... I actually feel weird without one anymore.

Our choices are so limited it really becomes frustrating. Tee shirts,

polo shirts. Jeans or those miserably styled men's shorts. In my case

it is even more frustrating because, having been on hormones in the

past, I must wear dark colored shirts to mask my small but clearly

feminine boobs. They also rule out wearing men's swimming trunks

for obvious reasons.

I don't have an answer for you because in many respects there are

none unless we go to rather extraordinary lengths to put ourselves in

position to dress as we wish .... long walks in the woods, camping in

secluded areas, and stuff like that. I am fortunate that my wife accepts

me and we live at the end of a gravel road, so as soon as I get home

forom work I can wear what I like ... and what I like is wearing clothes

that express the real me, not the me going about things as I do in

guy world. That includes a beautiful one piece swimsuit with a pretty

skirt that makes soaking in the hot tub in the evening a real pleasure.

Just the same, it all falls short of what we may do during the other

seasons. :blowup:

Jan

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Guest Chii

Thankfully in Scotland its too cold for any of this to happen :P Short skirts have never phased me - I have been out on the street in some things that I'm sure many mothers wouldnt approve of! - but I understand the bathing suit dilemma. Even in short skirts Im constantly worried and in my own head and sometimes not able to let go so I know Id never be able to wear a swimsuit and be at all comfortable until certain operations had taken place...though once again Im thankful to live somewhere that the sun doesnt like to visit!

Chii xx

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Guest Lizzie McTrucker

Okay there is one good thing to summer. I can finally wear tank tops and lose this farmer tan once and for all!

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Guest hidden_me

I look longingly at the bikinis each summer, but yeah, not gonna happen. Not for a while. Maybe if I can find a nice secluded place in the lake...hmm :D

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Guest Kendra K

Made a stop at Wal-Mart yesterday because I wanted a swimsuit. I did what I usually do and grab a shopping basket and then grab a t-shirt from the men's department. When I select what I really want from the women's department I then put that under the t-shirt and head for the cash registers, which are wonderfully self-checkout.

I'm kind of laughing at myself now, because I left the store with nothing, because....... I didn't see a bikini in a style I liked.

:Crylol:

Kind of shows something, a year ago or so I would have said any bikini/swimsuit.

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Guest winterangel

Made a stop at Wal-Mart yesterday because I wanted a swimsuit. I did what I usually do and grab a shopping basket and then grab a t-shirt from the men's department. When I select what I really want from the women's department I then put that under the t-shirt and head for the cash registers, which are wonderfully self-checkout.

I'm kind of laughing at myself now, because I left the store with nothing, because....... I didn't see a bikini in a style I liked.

:Crylol:

Kind of shows something, a year ago or so I would have said any bikini/swimsuit.

:lol:

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Kyla666

Not to bust any bobbles about the self-checkout or anything BUT!!! I work at wal-mart and the people that stand up by the self-checkout "AKA" the people who help you when things go wrong.. Can see every idem you scan on a screen.

The Screen displays all the self-checkouts and whats being scanned, We are even told to keep a look out/Watch the people as they check out.

But still it's better then face to face :Crylol: unless your unlucky like me and buy two bras with other things and when you get up to the self-checkout 1 of the bra's ring up wrong saying (55$ And the wrong name) .... The lady came over and had to get a price from it and everything :doh1: that was a BAD day.

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