Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Random ramblings again


Guest Kael147

Recommended Posts

Guest Kael147

Hey folks,

Haven't been on in a couple weeks. Laying a little low. I've been super wrapped up in my work and gender stuff. Kids and the rest of it -

I've come out at the office and with my professional governing body and political body. Everyone has been really great. I've got the paperwork all drawn up to change my name and just have to find my birth certificate and marriage cert. I'm pretty stoked.

I've been on t for a month now. It was a super low dose of androgel so not a lot of changes going on. I've learned that I need to wear loose pants or the seams causes bad things!!!! Well good feelings, but hard to concentrate!

However, first shot of delatestryl today so I'm on a much higher dosage and should be on track to proper t levels for a man.

My emotions have been fairly stable, but feel like I'm heading into a depression or something, but I don't really know, maybe just feeling like I want something to happen. It would be nice if I started to look more like a dude, but I need to have patience.

I'm thinking of maybe taking some time off work, but my wife isn't too keen on it. I need a mental break, but not sure I can afford it!

Anyway guys - hope you are all well and keeping it real!

Kael

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Thanks for the update Kael. The news about work is great!

The rest sounds a little like a roller coaster. I think that shot will start things rolling faster but I know that feeling of things not happening fast enough. Time just seems to drag with nothing but worry and sacrifice and then one day you will look in the mirror and see it. And wonder eventually how it happened so fast.

Transitioning can really be a roller coaster with periods of euphoria for progress and finally feeling right-at least for me-followed by periods of despair that you have worked so hard and it doesn't show. meanwhile there are changes you haven't noticed yet happening and as many internal and emotional as external and physical I think. For me the internal have been more subtle but even more profound as I find my footing as my true self and slowly learn to release the me that was held prisoner inside got so long.

I hope this change brings you as much peace and satisfaction as it has me. Living as a man is just right. So very right somehow that everything else in life is better and the bad is more bearable because of it.

Johnny

Link to comment
Guest Lacey Lynne

Congrats bigtime, man! Told ya your professional peers would be cool with you! Barristers can be open-minded and hip!

Now, about that HRT: Ooohh-rah! You're an Honorary Marine now, Buddy! Semper Fi! (Canada got Marines, man?)

Peace & Success :thumbsup: Lacey Lynne

Link to comment
Guest Krisina

Thanks for the check in and about being busy wrapped up with work and gender stuff too. I hope you don't get too depressed and I hope you get to take a break. Even if you can find some time to go out on a nice day for a few hours on a nice peaceful walk and maybe a quiet day alone and a nice hot bath might help. Every little bit helps sometimes.

Krisina

Link to comment

Thanks for the up date it's good to hear from ya. Sounds like things are coming in order

Why not save for a break for now, give you something to look forward to? Iv just had 2 weeks off work and found that to be bad. I had more time to think things through so I ended up quite depressed. Now I'm back to work I find time flies and haven't had time to be depressed

All the best

Link to comment
Guest Gregg Jameson

Hi Kael,

You had crossed my mind recently and I'd wondered how things were going for you.

Sounds like things are moving along well! Congrats!

I hope you can get some time off if you'd like to do so!

If you get time off, maybe focus on activities that boost your morale?

I understand what Leo means about vacation time sometimes giving people more time to ruminate.

Always great to hear from you!

With Gratitude,

Brad

Link to comment
Guest Kael147

Hey folks,

Thanks for the feedback. I really think you are all pretty fantastic!

I have 7 hairs on my chin!!!! Hahaha!

No marines in Canada and I've already served in the Canadian forces many moons ago!

It has been super hard to deal with my professional life, hard to concentrate (especially after the t-shot)! My poor wife!

I took a bath last night and took this afternoon off and Monday and Friday next week.

Keeping it real!

Kael

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Gotta love those face hairs. I like mine so much I end up going around like a homeless man half the time. My beard is about 50% black-maybe a little more, 40% blond,10% white and still too sparse for a decent beard. In other words kind of freaky. Especially with my blond hair. But I love every cotton pickin' one of those hairs and cheer them on.

Now my legs are a different matter-there I have a pretty impressive beard going if only it was a whole lot further south.

Enjoy these changes and developments. They are kind of fun. One of my favorites is picking up something that once seemed heavy. I nearly ended up doing a backflip when I picked up the mattress on my bed. Before that when I turned it I had a huge struggle and wasn't prepared for how light it had suddenly become:D And climbing hills is FUN instead of a struggle. All kinds of things like that start to happen that just feel right. We won't mention libido. Though I do see it as a real bonus too. I LIKE being a man physically too. I like it a lot.

Enjoy and keep us posted!

Johnny

Link to comment
Guest Kael147

Hey guys, hair is weird - of all places, it is growing fastest in my hands. It's like my arm hair is migrating. It's still kind of peach fuzzy, but black and definitely growing!

Kind of crazy in such a short time.

It's good to be started and I'm so looking forward to becoming physically a man and hopefully I'll match my outside with my insides!

Kael

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   0 Members, 0 Anonymous, 60 Guests (See full list)

    • There are no registered users currently online
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.9k
    • Total Posts
      771.7k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,180
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Chan97
    Newest Member
    Chan97
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Donica
      Donica
      (67 years old)
    2. feather
      feather
    3. Ibis
      Ibis
    4. Jimmy Alecsander
      Jimmy Alecsander
      (18 years old)
    5. JOrozco1982
      JOrozco1982
      (42 years old)
  • Posts

    • KayC
      This is funny because I found that I much prefer the term water balloon bag rather than the original word I used that was auto-corrected.  OK!  New word for my thesaurus
    • VickySGV
      There in no single key rule for that. It is going to be the connection you make with any lesbian, gay or cis het person. One size fits all is just not there, especially if you are non-op on the bottom and maybe not even then.  There may be a Lesbian out there who will want a romantic relation with you, but it will be after establishing a long term friendly relation with the person. My Lesbian friends and I have good social times, but even among themselves romantic relations are not the stuff that gets written in adult magazines.   Just a reminder, this is not a dating site, and we do have teenage members who rely on us for safety so how to catch a lesbian lover is not totally appropriate for discussion here.  
    • KymmieL
      Next Saturday is pride in the park. I just may go. Hey I'm a transwoman.   Kymmie
    • DreamWalker
      This is so great to hear. 🥰 How is it going now if you don’t mind me asking?     
    • Birdie
      Looks like Buchanan modern
    • BellaDon
      Hey everyone, I have been struggling to make cis lesbians comfortable being my romantic partner. Does anyone have any suggestions? Responses to accusations of transphobia and bigotry aren’t what I’d hoped for.
    • ClaireBloom
      Thank you.  This will be a big step when it happens.  It reminds me of the first time (and only) time I went out en femme with a friend to an LGBT club in another city.  We spent the evening getting ready and I was as nervous as could be.  Until the moment when the nervousness just....stopped,  and I said "it's now or never". I touched up my lipstick, grabbed my purse, and away we went. I had an amazing night.   This time it'll be in my own town in broad daylight, so there's a couple of more factors than before, but I hope I can pull it off again.
    • AllieJ
      Dreamwalker, I dropped hints for years, grew my hair out, trimmed eyebrows, long nails, but everyone I came out to was shocked. They all subconsciously knew, and after absorbing what I told them they said it made sense, but changing sex to most people is just not something they would think about. When my wife told me she wanted commitment from me, I made sure she understood I was transgender, and thought bumpy, 4 months later we married.    She supported my need to be me at home for our 20 year marriage, but she was terrified someone might find out. When my dysphoria made me very sick, she supported my starting HRT, and 2 years later, supported me through GRS, but when I was a month post op, she announced she was leaving. That was 3 years ago, and though we live apart, we talk almost every day, and are BFF's.    I feared I would lose her, then felt we would stay together, then she left, and now we are close friends. The point is, we just don't know how these things will work out. All we can do is be as honest as we can. Marriage is a partnership, and things like Gender Incongruence and transitioning need to be discussed and decided by both of you if you hope to retain the partnership. It can be a rollercoaster, but for some, it works out. Give it your best shot, and then you won't have regrets into the future. I so hope you can get through this, and when you do, please post so others can be encouraged.   Hugs,   Allie  
    • Adrianna Danielle
      Went over that guy's house and bought that Mac tool cart this morning.His price was right and nothing wrong with it
    • Willow
      Hi   so who can identify this plaid?  Perhaps, one of our Scottish friends?  Yes, I know, or at least I know what I was told.
    • Vidanjali
      I agree with Carolyn Marie. Further, I'll emphasize that as your wife's already noticed and commented, any effort on your part to reassure her that "everything's fine" actually adds more to her stress than coming out ultimately would because it's clear she knows everything is not fine and therefore invalidating her perceptions is not the kind thing to do. Be kind to both of you - take the chance to live your life together free of suppression, anxiety, suspicion, and worry. I'll also note that initial reactions, whatever they may be, are not necessarily indicative of how your spouse will always feel. We have heard many testimonies, from myself included, of severe negative initial responses which eventually smoothed out in time given the opportunity to have ongoing conversations and emotional processing. Good luck & best wishes.
    • Ivy
      Welcome Andi 
    • Ivy
      This is a hard place to be.
    • Carolyn Marie
      If you click on the OP's name, you can find all of their past posts and see if they've posted recently.  That's the only easy way to find out.  We don't have a listing of people who have left or just stopped being active.   Carolyn Marie
    • Sally Stone
      Post 16 My Transformation (Part 1)   I never believed what Lou Reed said when he sung: “…plucked her eyebrows on the way, shaved her legs and the he was a she.”  If only transformation from man to woman could be so easy.  My transformation involves so much more.  For me to feel comfortable in my feminine persona, I want to ensure my appearance is as feminine as possible, so my physical transformation is usually an arduous process.       Makeup is critical for me because it helps to camouflage my masculine facial features.  It’s amazing how much my face transforms when I contour and add color. Hair is important too because the right style can really feminize a face.  I found a wig many years ago that I thought was the perfect style for my face.  I bought five of them, all in different shades.   I have learned how powerful wardrobe can be to my transformation, but the challenge is finding women’s clothing that looks good on me.  This isn’t an easy task because women’s clothes aren’t cut to accommodate my male body shape.  My solution is to alter the shape of my body with padding and foundation garments.  Cinching my waist, and adding hip and butt pads give me an hourglass figure that makes my body more compatible with curvy women’s clothing.    Dealing with my male shoulders is a different kind of challenge.  It’s impossible to alter my skeletal structure, so the best I can hope for is to draw attention away from the shoulders.  The tactic I use for this is to wear tops and dresses with a v-cut or low neckline.  This may seem counterintuitive but low-cut tops draw attention away from the shoulders focusing it on the center of the chest.  Having curvy hips and a shapely bottom also help to minimize the look of broad shoulders.   Footwear is an important component of my transformation, and since I adore high-heels, my shoes tend to overtly feminine to start with.  Lately, my go to shoes are booties.  I have numerous pairs that range from casual to dressy (all with higher heels, of course), so I can wear booties with just about anything.  I’ve worn booties with jeans, skirts, and even dresses, and they look great with each.   I put a lot of effort into my transformation to ensure I appear as feminine as I possibly can.  Since I am not doing HRT and I haven’t had any physical feminization procedures much of my effort is to camouflage those physical male characteristics that would otherwise undermine my feminine presentation.  Given what I have to work with, I think I do a pretty good job getting the look right, but this only the first half of my transformation.  The second half is mastering feminine movement and mannerisms, which is even more challenging.   I’ll save that discussion for the next post.   Hugs,   Sally
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...