Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Random ramblings again


Guest Kael147

Recommended Posts

Guest Kael147

Hey folks,

Haven't been on in a couple weeks. Laying a little low. I've been super wrapped up in my work and gender stuff. Kids and the rest of it -

I've come out at the office and with my professional governing body and political body. Everyone has been really great. I've got the paperwork all drawn up to change my name and just have to find my birth certificate and marriage cert. I'm pretty stoked.

I've been on t for a month now. It was a super low dose of androgel so not a lot of changes going on. I've learned that I need to wear loose pants or the seams causes bad things!!!! Well good feelings, but hard to concentrate!

However, first shot of delatestryl today so I'm on a much higher dosage and should be on track to proper t levels for a man.

My emotions have been fairly stable, but feel like I'm heading into a depression or something, but I don't really know, maybe just feeling like I want something to happen. It would be nice if I started to look more like a dude, but I need to have patience.

I'm thinking of maybe taking some time off work, but my wife isn't too keen on it. I need a mental break, but not sure I can afford it!

Anyway guys - hope you are all well and keeping it real!

Kael

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Thanks for the update Kael. The news about work is great!

The rest sounds a little like a roller coaster. I think that shot will start things rolling faster but I know that feeling of things not happening fast enough. Time just seems to drag with nothing but worry and sacrifice and then one day you will look in the mirror and see it. And wonder eventually how it happened so fast.

Transitioning can really be a roller coaster with periods of euphoria for progress and finally feeling right-at least for me-followed by periods of despair that you have worked so hard and it doesn't show. meanwhile there are changes you haven't noticed yet happening and as many internal and emotional as external and physical I think. For me the internal have been more subtle but even more profound as I find my footing as my true self and slowly learn to release the me that was held prisoner inside got so long.

I hope this change brings you as much peace and satisfaction as it has me. Living as a man is just right. So very right somehow that everything else in life is better and the bad is more bearable because of it.

Johnny

Link to comment
Guest Lacey Lynne

Congrats bigtime, man! Told ya your professional peers would be cool with you! Barristers can be open-minded and hip!

Now, about that HRT: Ooohh-rah! You're an Honorary Marine now, Buddy! Semper Fi! (Canada got Marines, man?)

Peace & Success :thumbsup: Lacey Lynne

Link to comment
Guest Krisina

Thanks for the check in and about being busy wrapped up with work and gender stuff too. I hope you don't get too depressed and I hope you get to take a break. Even if you can find some time to go out on a nice day for a few hours on a nice peaceful walk and maybe a quiet day alone and a nice hot bath might help. Every little bit helps sometimes.

Krisina

Link to comment

Thanks for the up date it's good to hear from ya. Sounds like things are coming in order

Why not save for a break for now, give you something to look forward to? Iv just had 2 weeks off work and found that to be bad. I had more time to think things through so I ended up quite depressed. Now I'm back to work I find time flies and haven't had time to be depressed

All the best

Link to comment
Guest Gregg Jameson

Hi Kael,

You had crossed my mind recently and I'd wondered how things were going for you.

Sounds like things are moving along well! Congrats!

I hope you can get some time off if you'd like to do so!

If you get time off, maybe focus on activities that boost your morale?

I understand what Leo means about vacation time sometimes giving people more time to ruminate.

Always great to hear from you!

With Gratitude,

Brad

Link to comment
Guest Kael147

Hey folks,

Thanks for the feedback. I really think you are all pretty fantastic!

I have 7 hairs on my chin!!!! Hahaha!

No marines in Canada and I've already served in the Canadian forces many moons ago!

It has been super hard to deal with my professional life, hard to concentrate (especially after the t-shot)! My poor wife!

I took a bath last night and took this afternoon off and Monday and Friday next week.

Keeping it real!

Kael

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Gotta love those face hairs. I like mine so much I end up going around like a homeless man half the time. My beard is about 50% black-maybe a little more, 40% blond,10% white and still too sparse for a decent beard. In other words kind of freaky. Especially with my blond hair. But I love every cotton pickin' one of those hairs and cheer them on.

Now my legs are a different matter-there I have a pretty impressive beard going if only it was a whole lot further south.

Enjoy these changes and developments. They are kind of fun. One of my favorites is picking up something that once seemed heavy. I nearly ended up doing a backflip when I picked up the mattress on my bed. Before that when I turned it I had a huge struggle and wasn't prepared for how light it had suddenly become:D And climbing hills is FUN instead of a struggle. All kinds of things like that start to happen that just feel right. We won't mention libido. Though I do see it as a real bonus too. I LIKE being a man physically too. I like it a lot.

Enjoy and keep us posted!

Johnny

Link to comment
Guest Kael147

Hey guys, hair is weird - of all places, it is growing fastest in my hands. It's like my arm hair is migrating. It's still kind of peach fuzzy, but black and definitely growing!

Kind of crazy in such a short time.

It's good to be started and I'm so looking forward to becoming physically a man and hopefully I'll match my outside with my insides!

Kael

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   5 Members, 0 Anonymous, 152 Guests (See full list)

    • MaybeRob
    • KayC
    • EasyE
    • Betty K
    • MaeBe
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.5k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,029
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Selkimur
    Newest Member
    Selkimur
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. BraxtonLee
      BraxtonLee
      (26 years old)
    2. Bryanna
      Bryanna
      (45 years old)
    3. Jayde1
      Jayde1
    4. Mireya
      Mireya
      (66 years old)
    5. Shellianne_Kay83
      Shellianne_Kay83
      (41 years old)
  • Posts

    • Mirrabooka
      Voting is compulsory here, for better or worse. Would doing the same in the US snap people out of their apathy?
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I am noting you use CRT terminology.  The comment is not out of the blue.  Some of your remarks on religion suggest atheism.  So it is believable that you are a Marxist, knowingly or not.  Are you?
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Congrats to your family on the new addition!
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Funny you think that I would be able to get through more than two sentences with how bad my stutter gets (joking, of course)   My topic would probably be mythology, random Japan factoids in my mind, or a favorite story   (Best option would be a fave story of mine including a lot of factoids on Japanese myths-)
    • Willow
      Congratulations @ivy. Nothing beats a family growing two feet at a time!
    • April Marie
      I read each of your entries and learn so much. Thank you, especially, for the TransCentralPA info. I have been looking fora group and activities where I could express myself safely and with support. I missed this year's conference but next year might be possible and I am going to look at their other events, too.
    • April Marie
      Leadership and Management, the differences and similarities between the two as well as the applications of military leadership principles across the spectrum of professions.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I have read numerous accounts of trans folk no longer being welcome among evangelicals.   I am here for help and fellowship not to rebuke anyone.  I can take a pretty high degree of insult, etc., and you haven't insulted me, to my recollection anyway :) and I usually let it go.  But I thought I would let it all out there.   I am sure I disagree with you on numerous issues.  I appreciate other people's viewpoints, including those who radically disagree with me.  Intellectual challenge is good. One thing I appreciate about @MaeBe.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Congrats!
    • Sally Stone
      Post 8 “The Ohio Years” We moved to Pittsburgh because of the job with US Airways.  The job involved classroom instruction and simulator training, but no actual flying, so I kept looking for an actual pilot position.  A year after signing on with US Airways I got hired to fly business jets.  The company was located in Cleveland, Ohio, but I was flown commercially from my home in Pittsburgh to where my aircraft was located, making it unnecessary to live near company headquarters.    My flight scheduled consisted of eight days on duty with seven days off.  Having seven days off in a row was great but being gone from home eight days in a row was difficult.  For the first few years the flying was fun, but after a while the eight flying days in a row, were taking their toll on me.  Those days were brutal, consisting of very long hours and a lot of flying time.  Usually, I came home exhausted and need three days just to recover from the work week.  Flying for a living is glamorous until you actually do it.  Quickly, it became just a job.    After five years as a line captain, I became a flight department manager, which required we live near company headquarters.  That meant a move to Cleveland.  Working in the office meant I was home every night but as a manager, the schedule was still challenging.  I would work in the office all week and then be expected to go out and fly the line on weekends.  I referred to it as my “5 on 2 on” schedule, because it felt as though I had no time off at all.   About the same time, we moved to Cleveland, my wife and I became “empty nesters,” with one son in the military and the other away at college.  Sadly, my work schedule didn’t leave much time for Sally.  Add to the fact that while Cleveland is an awesome city, I just never felt comfortable expressing my feminine side.  Most of my outings, and believe me there weren’t enough, occurred while I was on vacation and away from home.   One of the most memorable outings occurred over a long weekend.  I had stumbled across an online notice for a spring formal being held in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, hosted by a local trans group there.  I reached out to Willa to see if she was up for an excellent adventure.  She was, so I picked her up and we drove to Harrisburg together.    The formal was held on Saturday evening and we had the absolute best time.  It turned out that organizers were a group named TransCentralPA.  Everyone was wonderful and I made a lot of new friends that evening.  We learned the spring formal was one of the group’s annual events but for the following year, instead of a spring formal, the group wanted to do a local transgender conference.  That local conference would become the Keystone Conference, and I would attend every year for the next 12.  My move to the west coast was the only reason I stopped attending annually.  I went to the first annual Keystone Conference as an attendee, but in subsequent years I served as a volunteer and as a workshop presenter; more about those in the next installment.   For my Cleveland years, the Keystone Conference would be my major outlet for feminine self-expression.  Yes, I did get out on other occasions, but they were too infrequent.  The managerial job just didn’t allow me the freedom I needed to adequately live my feminine life, and my frustration level was slowly, but steadily on the rise.  It amazed me how adversely not being able to express the feminine half of my personality was affecting my happiness.   However, a major life change was upcoming, and while it would prove to be a significant challenge in many ways, the events would ultimately benefit my female persona.  First, my mom and dad got sick.  They were in and out of the hospital and required personal care.  My wife and I did our best but living in Cleveland, we were too far from them to give them the support they both needed.  Second, I was experiencing serious job burn out.  I decided I need to find another job and I needed to be closer to my parents.    Things changed for the better when I got hired by an aviation training company as a flight simulator instructor.  I would be training business jet pilots.  The training facility was located in New Jersey, which put us much closer to my parents, and the work schedule was much better for quality of life.  Most importantly, this life change would help Sally re-emerge and once again flower.    Hugs,   Sally       
    • Mmindy
      I made a living talking about bulk liquids in cargo tanks transportation as a driver and mechanic. Safe loading/unloading, cleaning and inspecting, as well as emergency response scenarios.   Hazmat and fire behavior in the fire service as well as emergency vehicle operations and safe driving. "It was on fire when they called you. It will be on fire when you get there." Arrive ready to work. I could also talk about firefighter behavioral  heath and the grieving process.   The real fun thing is I can do this for people who are not Truck Drivers or Fire Fighters. Girl Scouts, Boy Scouts, Citizen Tax payers about Public Safety Education.   I love public speaking,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Mmindy
      Congratulations to the mom and family @Ivy on the addition of another child.   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • MaeBe
      Congrats to you and yours!
    • Ashley0616
      YAY! Congratulations on a granddaughter!
    • Ashley0616
      I recommend CarComplaints.com | Car Problems, Car Complaints, & Repair/Recall Information. A lot of good information

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...