Can't style hair at all!

[Guest ValerieD]

I went to a hair stylist last Wednesday to try to feminize my hair. I looked great... for a day. The problem is, I can't re-create it at all! I basically have to brush and blow dry my hair at the same time, but my skills at doing either even one at a time are atrocious! When I try to brush my hair the way my stylist showed me, I need to use two hands at all times or else my hair becomes a tangled mess. Attempting to blow dry my hair results in it becoming tangled, frizzy, and dry/brittle.

I don't have any clue what to do! Having feminine hair is essential to passing (even though I've been growing it since October, it's still boy length), and I'm going full time in a week! I don't have anyone to help me with this; no female friends (no good friends period, actually), no relatives that I'm out to except parents, and my parents are doing just about everything they can (except kick me out of the house or deny college funds) to delay/derail my transition while trying to appear supportive, so Mom's been of no help either.

[Carolyn Marie]

Why not go back to the hair stylist, and ask them to show you how? The worst that could happen is they say no; but they won't because they want you back as a customer.

Good luck.

Carolyn marie

[Guest ValerieD]

Unfortunately they're in Potsdam and I'll be in Rochester (4 hours away) until after I'm already full time.

[VickySGV]

Last resort may just be a wig. I have used them for over -- <too long> -- and you will "pass" whatever that means even in extended day wear. Of course, they have to be cared for too. A synthetic CAN look VERY good and has the advantage of the style being locked in. You do have to practice even there, which by the way, is the only way you will get your hair right. It took me two and a half years before my hair was long enough to wear wtih any success. The two point five began AFTER I was on HRT, and my hair at least was hormone fertilized which took care of some guy unrulyness that I would have had.

Pink ball caps can work if you are made up. Get the ones from Victorias Secret, or other girl shops and use them instead of hair. Scarves or other hats work too. Not saying to pretend you have been super sick, but gals just off of chemo therapy are in your position, and they use that stuff.

Color your hair a "girls only" shade which is what mine is right now, even though it is just strawberry blond, its a "girls only blond" that guys do not use.

Just smile would be another thing. Natal females have a lot of reasons their hair gets looking like a guys, but they smile about it even while having the damage repaired, and don't worry about who they are.

[Guest melanie maritz]

Another option is youtube. Youtube has some really good hair tutorials, you should check them out and see if it works for you

[Guest SusanB]

Have always been a fan of long hair and mine has been long for over twenty years

I don't do much with mine, just a ponytail most of the time

Bought some spray from the hairdresser that i use before i flat iron. It makes my hair nice and smooth and shiney

[Guest Kattja]

I don't do much with my own hair, I like it down over my shoulders or in a pony tail, but back when I was married my wife (exwife now) had this brush hair dryer combo in one. She used it all the time and it looked like it worked out great. I think I got it for her at either Walmart or Macy's (I know huge difference hehe) but something like that might help out while getting used to styling your hair. Just a thought

Kattja Katt >^..^< Mew

[Guest ~Sara~]

Hi!!, i want to start doing it too!!, i have a long hair( a bit longer than Rapunzel's in my avatar hehe), it is naturally curly, but it is a mess!!!, i try to comb it a lot, but it just doesnt want to look feminine!!! it looks like this guy's but wider, i mean, add some to the sides and that's how my hair looks like http://images.contactmusic.com/newsimages/howard_stern_1264793.jpg, i want to make it look like this one http://www.naturallycurly.com/curly-hairstyles-pictures/view/medium-hair-styles--lovely-red-hair-11488.html, do you have any suggestions? thank you!!

Sara.

[Guest CassieX]

Hi ValerieD,

I understand your frustration as I too have hair that doesn't want to co-operate. I try to pay attention to what my stylist shows me so managed to remember a few useful things from my last visit. I have a pixie cut as its one of the few hair styles that goes with my face/ hair type. The longer bobs just looked horrible on me.

I use a styling foam with honey from Aveda called 'phomollient' after conditioning when my hair is still damp. Its pretty amazing stuff which once massaged in the hair makes it easier to style your hair without being sticky and adds volume.

I use a round bristle brush for drying which allows me to roll sections of hair on the brush and dry them with the dryer, creating more volume. Some spots are a pain to do, but with practice you can master the technique.

Once my hair is sort of how I want it to be and still a little damp, I take a very tiny amount of a product called 'being rubber' by Rusk and apply it to the tips of my hair. This eliminates the wispy bits and gives it more definition. The English on the tub says its a gum.

I use a straight bristle brush sometimes for general styling and have found a smaller brush much better for control, though if you have longer hair than me a larger brush might be better.

I finish up the whole creative experiment with a decent hairspray.

Then I go outside and scream as it starts to rain and the wind blows my painstakingly wrought creation to tatters.

Cassie

[Guest Carla_Davis]

I guess I should consider myself fortunate.

I have little natural hair left due to Male Pattern Balding.

I have to use a wig. I currently use a 100% Human Hair Wig but I am also looking into Synthetic wigs as they hold their shape better and easier to care for.

Hugs,

Carla