Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

A few poems I want to share. JodyAnn


Guest

Recommended Posts

My Price I Pay To Hope.

A poem by Jody

Hope is a nasty four letter verb.

It sets up my heart to be kicked to the curb.

Feeling a drop, then a drizzle, Hope's small gentle rain.

Then slippery, elusive, seeming to dissipate just to drive me insane!

Catch me a thimble full, a cup full, then next a bucket with a leak.

All washed away before me, that I thought was mine, whatever Hope made me seek.

Does a ruthless God laughingly stand back to enjoy all the tears that I cry?

Wicked Hope tricks me once again, rug pulled away, as I fall I just want to die.

Sleep, sweet eternal sleep, I so desire, escape from Hope at last, my trust to abide!

Or is this trickster Hope, tactically laying a new snare for me, just on the other side?

Thus I must wonder, who is this God I cling to with all of my pink beating heart?

The Author of Hope, a co-conspirator or a huckster, am I just his foolish Tart?

I abandon it all to Him, Hope be damned, I have no escape, I've slipped in love too deep.

The way God makes me feel so cared for, He just can't be unfaithful, a stalker or creep!

For all of my foolish desire to go and be with Him, God will come for me, I must wait.

Though with my small might, my wings won't lift me, Hope slays me on, is this my fate?

I will trade all Hope has to offer, to scrub the floors of Heaven with a smile on my face.

I can endure with my tears, that betraying Hope again, chance to lovingly gain my place.

Ó Copyright 2.5.2014 JodyAnnTaylor

The Pixie That Loves Me.

A poem by Jody

There is a pixie that lives in my brain.

She is a tiny sweet torrent. Love is her game.

Beautifully changing hues of pink, blue and purple too.

She's always batting her big blue eyes for shades of gray.

She steals my whiskers and paints my lips.

Always winking and smiling from the corner of my eye.

I long to see her sprightly beauty in every mirror I see.

She hides in my heart, odd guest reflections of her in the glass.

Teasing and tickling that beating heart in my expanding chest.

Peeking around vantages both so foreign and lovely fresh.

They look so intriguingly peculiar, but feel so at home for me.

When she enjoys me, she sprinkles my buds with sweet dewdrops.

I dress me up for her acceptance. Next I dress me down.

Just so a Lady can survive, living on the dangerous town.

She antagonizes relentlessly, no more drab glad rags of old.

The colors of a peacock unobtrusively condensed to a sparrow's mold.

She gives me back my youth. I want her sparkling charm.

Just to be loved as myself without any wayward harm.

Infatuation? Yes indeed, I love her so much I can't get away.

I want to be just like her and my own mirror someday.

One day soon, I earnestly hope and I pray.

To the God I so love. Please make me this way!

I wake today, to look in my mirror and what do I see?

Smiling brightly back, I'm the pixie I always longed to be!

Ó 01.26.2013 copyright JodyAnnTaylor

Mankind’s Mendacity Matures My Melancholy

A Bi-gender Poem By Jody

I am secure in my womanhood. God has set me free.

Yet so insecure in the black hearted world around me.

All harboring hurtful memories; he was never the man he appeared to be.

Why don’t I appear to the World as the lovely lady I am, so obvious to see?

Why do all those people have such beady staring small eyes?

Corridors to diremptious minds, with hearts embracing lies.

Do I also suffer that same smallness, judgmental affliction?

Even though I am born with my odd bi-gender contradiction.

I unchained my heart, hoping happy, joyous and free.

Just to be what I am to be, the woman deep inside of me

Served spite and scorn, murmur rumors all perverted dark.

Thus blocking out all the love given, just to leave me stark.

Crying oh God of my soul, my heart loving Lord,

Can’t this miracle you blessed me, give me afford?

Female yes indeed. Lady, Woman, Miss, Ma’am, She and Her,

All acknowledge my joy; yet too much for them to just concur.

Spike me to my cross with words such as He, Him, Mister and Sir.

Irrespective of ignorance, hatred or no malice, still driven with slur.

The truthful scribe in my hand flows sediments fly.

Waterfalls bleeding from my baby blue eyes as I cry!

I only want to be a girlish Angel, gowned beautifully in pure white.

How much boyish must I endure, before new wings give me flight?

Let my breasts stop heaving the breath of life, giving sunset to my rage

Please send my heart, being and energy to a magnificent bright new age.

May I leave it all to my sisters, as I have become far too weak?

My remaining desire is that for God, I am sufficiently meek!

Copyright 9.7.2014 JodyAnnTaylor

I hope you enjoy these, if you enjoy this sort of thing. Hug. JodyAnn

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Thank you Jody. I enjoyed each of them and will read them again. There is so much there to take in but each has a strong and expressive feeling.

Lots of hugs,

Charlize

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   7 Members, 0 Anonymous, 167 Guests (See full list)

    • Abigail Genevieve
    • Ashley0616
    • Ivy
    • Karen Carey
    • LucyF
    • SamC
    • Mmindy
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.4k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,029
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Selkimur
    Newest Member
    Selkimur
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Anyatimenow
      Anyatimenow
      (23 years old)
    2. Aria00
      Aria00
    3. Ava B.
      Ava B.
      (24 years old)
    4. Claire Heshi
      Claire Heshi
    5. CrystalMatthews0426
      CrystalMatthews0426
      (41 years old)
  • Posts

    • LucyF
      I've got Spironolactone 100mg and Evorel 50mcg Patches (2 a week) going up to 100mg after 4 weeks 
    • Ivy
      Got a new Granddaughter this morning.  Mother and child (and father) are doing fine. This makes 7 granddaughters and one grandson.  I have 2 sons and 6 daughters myself.  And then I  switched teams.  I think this stuff runs in the family. Another hard day for the patriarchy.
    • Ivy
      Like @MaeBe pointed out, Trump won't do these things personally.  I doubt that he actually gives a rat's a$$ himself.  But he is the foot in the door for the others.   I don't really see this.  Personally, I am all in favor of "traditional" families.  I raised my own kids this way and it can work fine.  But I think we need to allow for other variations as well.   One thing working against this now is how hard it is for a single breadwinner to support a family.  Many people (I know some) would prefer "traditional" if they could actually afford it.  Like I mentioned, we raised our family with this model, but we were always right at the poverty level.   I was a "conservative evangelical" for most of my life, actually.  So I do understand this.  Admittedly, I no longer consider myself one. I have family members still in this camp.  Some tolerate me, one actually rejects me.  I assure you the rejection is on her side, not mine.  But, I understand she believes what she is doing is right - 'sa pity though. I mean no insult toward anyone on this forum.  You're free to disagree with me.  Many people do.   This is a pretty complex one.  Socialism takes many forms, many of which we accept without even realizing it.  "Classism" does exist, for what it's worth.  Always has, probably always will.  But I don't feel like that is a subject for this forum.   As for the election, it's shaping up to be another one of those "hold your nose" deals.
    • Ivy
      Just some exerts regarding subjects of interest to me.
    • Ivy
      Yeah.  In my early teens I trained myself out of a few things that I now wish I hadn't.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I was thinking in particular of BLM, who years ago had a 'What We Believe' section that sounded like they were at war with the nuclear family.   I tried to find it. Nope.  Of interest https://www.politifact.com/article/2020/aug/28/ask-politifact-does-black-lives-matter-aim-destroy/   My time is limited and I will try to answer as I can.
    • Ivy
      Well, I suppose it is possible that they don't actually plan on doing what they say.  I'm not too sure I want to take that chance.  But I kinda expect to find out.  Yet, perhaps you're right and it's all just talk.  And anyway, my state GOP is giving me enough to worry about anyway. I remember a time when being "woke" just meant you were paying attention.  Now it means you are the antichrist. I just don't want the government "protecting" me from my personal "delusions."
    • MaeBe
      1.  I think there are some legitimate concern.   2. Thoroughly discussing this will consume many threads.   3. I disagree partially with @MaeBe but there is partial agreement.   4. The context includes what is happening in society that the authors are observing.  It is not an isolated document.   The observation is through a certain lens, because people do things differently doesn't mean they're doing it wrong. Honestly, a lot of the conservative rhetoric is morphing desires of people to be treated with respect and social equity to be tantamount to the absolution of the family, heterosexuality, etc. Also, being quiet and trying to blend in doesn't change anything. Show me a social change that benefits a minority or marginalized group that didn't need to be loud.   5. Trump, if elected, is as likely to spend his energies going after political opponents as he is to implementing something like this.   Trump will appoint people to do this, like Roger Severino (who was appointed before, who has a record of anti-LGBTQ+ actions), he need not do anything beyond this. His people are ready to push this agenda forward. While the conservative right rails about bureaucracy, they intend to weaponize it. There is no question. They don't want to simplify government, they simply want to fire everyone and bring in conservative "warriors" (their rhetoric). Does America survive 4 year cycles of purge/cronyism?   6. I reject critical theory, which is based on Marxism.  Marxism has never worked and never will.  Critical theory has problems which would need time to go into, which I do not have.   OK, but this seems like every other time CRT comes up with conservatives...completely out of the blue. I think it's reference is mostly just to spark outrage from the base. Definitely food thought for a different thread, though.   7. There are groups who have declared war on the nuclear family as problematically patriarchal, and a lot of other terms. They are easy to find on the internet.  This document is reacting to that (see #4 above).   What is the war on the nuclear family? I searched online and couldn't find much other than reasons why people aren't getting married as much or having kids (that wasn't a propaganda from Heritage or opinions pieces from the right that paint with really broad strokes). Easy things to see: the upward mobility and agency of women, the massive cost of rearing children, general negative attitudes about the future, male insecurity, etc. None of this equates to a war on the nuclear family, but I guess if you look at it as "men should be breadwinners and women must get married for financial support and extend the male family line (and to promote "National Greatness") I could see the decline of marriage as a sign of the collapse of a titled system and, if I was a beneficiary of that system or believe that to NOT be tilted, be aggrieved.   8.  Much of this would have to be legislated, and this is a policy documented.  Implementation would  be most likely different, but that does not mean criticism is unwarranted.   "It might be different if you just give it a chance", unlike all the other legislation that's out there targeting LGBTQ+ from the right, these are going to be different? First it will be trans rights, then it will be gay marriage, and then what? Women's suffrage?   I get it, we may have different compasses, but it's not hard to see that there's no place for queer people in the conservative worldview. There seems to be a consistent insistence that "America was and is no longer Great", as if the 1950s were the pinnacle of society, completely ignoring how great America still is and can continue to be--without having to regress society to the low standards of its patriarchal yesteryears.    
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Cadillac parts are pretty expensive, so repairing them costs more.  But they don't seem to break down more than other makes.  Lots of Lincoln models use Ford cars as a base, so you can get parts that aren't much more expensive.    My family has had good luck with "Panther platform" cars.  Ford Crown Victoria, Mercury Marquis, Lincoln Towncar or Continental.  4.6 V8 and 5.0 V8.  Reasonable fuel economy, and fairly durable.  Our county sheriff's office was running Chargers and SUV's for a while, but has gone back to older Crown Victorias for ease of maintenance.  GF rebuilds them here.  But they are getting more scarce, since the newest ones were made in 2011.    1992-1997 years were different than the later years.  1998-2001 they did some changes, and apparently the best years are 2003 to 2011.  Check Craigslist, and also government auctions.  GF has gotten a lot of them at auction, and they can be had in rough-but-running shape for around $1,000.  Ones in great shape can be found in the $5,000+ range.  Good for 200,000 miles without significant rebuilding.  Go through engine and transmission and electrical systems, and they go half a million.    Some Chrysler models are OK.  The 300 mostly has the same engines as the Charger and Challenger, so parts availability is pretty good.  But they tend to get timing issues.  The older Chrysler Sebring convertibles were pretty reliable, sometimes going 200,000 miles without tons of problems, although after that they were pretty much worn out. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I think I have read everything the Southern Baptists have to say on transgender, and it helped convince me they are dead wrong on these issues.  They can be nice people.  I would never join an SBC church.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You come across as a thoughtful, sweet, interesting and pleasant person.    There are parts of this country, and more so the world, where evangelicals experience a great deal of finger wagging.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      It has been an interesting experience being in a marriage in a Christian faith community, yet being intersex/trans.  I stay pretty quiet, and most have kind of accepted that I'm just the strange, harmless exception.  "Oh, that's just Jen.  Jen is...different."  I define success as being a person most folks just overlook. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, I live in an area with a lot of Southern Baptists, Evangelicals, etc...  We've experienced our share of finger-wagging, as the "standard interpretation" of Scripture in the USA is that the Bible only approves of "one man, one woman" marriage.  My faith community is mostly accepted here, but that has taken time and effort.  It can be tough at times to continue to engage with culture and the broader population, and avoid the temptation to huddle up behind walls like a cult.    Tolerance only goes so far.  At one point, my husband was asked to run for sheriff.  He declined, partly because an elected official with four wives would have a REALLY tough time.  (Of course, making way less than his current salary wasn't an option either). 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      My bone structure is far more female than male.  I can't throw like a guy, which has been observed by guys numerous times, and moving like a woman is more natural.  It just is.  I'm not going out of my way to act in a fem. way, as you say, but I am letting go of some of the 'I am not going to move like that because I am a guy' stuff I have defensively developed.  The other breaks through anyway - there were numerous looks from people at work when I would use gestures that are forbidden to men, or say something spontaneously no guy would ever say.   At one point, maybe a year or more ago, I said it was unfair for people to think they were dealing with a man when they were actually dealing with a woman.    Girl here.  'What is a woman' is a topic for another day.
    • Willow
      Mom, I’m home!  What’s for lunch?   Leftover pizza .   ok.    Not exactly our conversation but there is truth in the answer.     @KymmieLsorry you are sick. Feel better soon.   Girl mode, boy mode no mode, not us. Nothing functional for either of us.   anyone here have or had a 10 year old (plus or minus) Caddy, Lincoln or Chrysler?  How was it?  Lots of repairs?  Comfortable seats? Anything positive or negative about it?  I need to replace my 2004 Ford Explorer Eddie Bauer, it’s eating $100 dollar bills and needs a couple of thousand dollars worth of work and that doesn’t even fix the check engine code.  Obviously, it isn’t worth putting that kind of money into a 20 year old car with a 174 thousand miles.   Willow
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...