What are the passing nessesities?

[Guest Rose]

I've just started dressing in women's cloths and am somewhat uncertain as to what I need to pass well. I have breast forms, and I have some means of tucking, but I don't have any good, stumble-concealing makeup and don't know where to start with that. I am also uncertain as to whether or not the various products advertized as helpful for giving one a more feminine form (padded underwear and corset-like body shapers) are a good investment, given that I am thin, and not overly masculine. I also would like to know if there is any good way to hide my Adam's apple. In other advice in the way of passing would also be helpful as I am new to this.

Thank you,

Rose

[Carolyn Marie]

IMO, the keys to passing are voice, self confidence, good makeup, a good wig or a nice, age-appropriate hairstyle, and age-appropriate clothing (situationally appropriate, too). Pretty much in that order.

Self confidence is really more important than people realize. You can look great, but if you're nervous, paranoid, unsmiling and unnatural, people will notice, and think you odd. If you are looking around the room trying to see who's staring at you, that alone will attract attention. So be natural, be self assured, and be calm.

As for makeup, there are plenty of great tips in the Beauty Forum on which foundations and/or concealer work well. There are good and bad points for liquid, powder and cream foundations. I like liquid, but that's just me. I'm not sure about how best to hide an Adam's apple. You might try Youtube for tips.

Good luck, hon.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Carla_Davis]

Hi Rose,

Carolyn Marie has given you some helpful advice

This link may be helpful for you

Passing Glances A primer on passing and successful transition for the early-stage transwoman
http://superliminal.com/melinda/passingglances.htm

In regards to you’re Adams Apple, I know many transgender women who wear scarfs or high collar tops to hide it.

I hope this information is helpful for you.

I wish you Success and Happiness in your Journey

Hugs,

Carla

[Guest Jamie61]

Hi Rose, re: stubble concealer makeup... My routine is : shave, moisturize, wait, primer ( tarte ), concealer in areas ( I use Benefit Boing concealer ), then a liquid foundation ( I use bare mineral ). From there you can contour ( apply different shades of makeup to create shape )which can help your face as well as your neck and Adam's apple. The number one aspect to passing is your attitude! There is so much overlap between the genders that you really just need to believe yourself and you'll be fine. I do prepare to be confident so that I can handling anyone who might try to bother me. Finally don't do anything foolish, women out in isolation are vulnerable so you must remember to be safe. Baby steps!

Love,

Jamie

[Guest Melissa~]

MtF only:

Voice, hair, stature, attitude matter. When one passes, it doesn't matter what a person wears, they are still their gender.

I would advise to avoid and mitigate as many tells as possible, including the already mentioned adam's apple, facial hair(all hair, it's a grooming thing), trashed hands, muddy boots(women typically wear clean clothes regardless of their wear condition, ie scuffs are fine, grease isn't.)

Adding as many feminine things you can control of course helps, for example wearing a male business suit won't gender a person male by itself, but that's advanced stuff. Definitely wear standard women's wear for daily activity, or fancier if you care to, but the further out of the norm for any given locale the more attention you attract, and the more attention-the more likely you are to be read, if marginal.

Take for example the adrogynous look on Annie Lennox here, she's an icon. Do some analysis on why she looks the way she does.

[Charlize]

Adam's apples are simply a matter of turtle necks or scarves as mentioned above. There is a relatively simply surgery that can remove that problem as well. I tried and then thought i needed padding for a period of time. It was actually unnecessary. Women are built in all kinds of shapes and i love compliments from other women about what good shape i'm in. A small backside seems to be a mark of youth and good health.

Beard coverage can be difficult. Shave closely and go to a professional at a cosmetic store to help. Getting a good foundation that matches your skin color will go a long way.

Eyebrows are more important than many realize. Many women have somewhat bushy eyebrows but it is unusual for a man to have thin shaped brows.

Melissa has some good points as do many others. Look at as many women as you can and see what says 'woman " to you.

If it is something you can do give it a try. As we get started the more clues we can give the more likely we are to pass. Eventually it is simply you being yourself, a woman.

Hugs,

Charlize

[Guest Loren-t]

I work in the Retail Industry and confidence goes along ways. Makeup is also key in everything your not wanting to look glam-my or unnatural go for a neutral look and if you can a professional look. Also selecting out clothes be realistic your not going to run around all day at work in high heels on a concrete floor trust me I work on one.. Pay attention to others around you take a glance and learn what others are wearing blend in that's very important.. I cant think of anything else other than take a breath of fresh air and stay calm you will face many different types of people out there the best approach is to treat every situation as it comes balance the day if you can.. I was talking to some one a few years back that was so worried about being discovered they actually put themselves into a panic attack.. As far as clothes I would strongly recommend going to 2nd hand shops just because you will be buying new clothes often as things changes just a hint. hope any of this helps.

[Guest noeleena]

Hi,

Okay , If you can get a better photo of my self so you can see my features better you will not see any makeup just eye brow liner and lippy thats it , age at 67

i have a lovely olive skin and i use any cream for my face ..okay the nitty gritty bits . because my body is not completly hair free because of hormones i still like some women have to shave , my hair is white so i do not need makeup or a cover , over the last 5 months i have been using an epilater , and pulling the hair out as i have done over 95 % of my body , and thats at about 8 % body hair , left if that , and i may do it about every 2 or 3 months if i can be bothered as its all most all gone .

Whats this to do with passing or blending in and clothes, seems to play a part in it as well , in my case it does not matter at all .

Now some 6 years ago i went to our Polyteck to do health and beauty with 6 other women and it went well , i allso spent 2 years hard out with makeup and tryed different products to find what suited my skin tones and and colours , Jos helped me and if it was not right it was get it off and do again till i had it right ,, i went to our largest beauty shop and had makeup done by two different ladys so there are women who dont mind ( men ) coming in and spending time having thier makeup done ,

At the time i was unsure how it would go becaue i was coming to a place of do i really need makeup, in the end i gave up wearing it at all so the reason now why i dont ,

This part gets quite personal , i was coming to a place of does the makeup make me look like a fool and silly because of my facial features being more masculine for a female even Jos said i should wear a little i did for a short time and our grandchild and Jos were using it more than i and Dejan Grandchild took most of what i had any way and unless our Kaylyn daughter brought it for me i gave up,

So from all of this its about use as little as you need having to much on can make you look like well some of the young women so covering thier face and looking over done and i know they have lovely skin. do get some help in the end youll be pleased you did ,

...noeleena...

[Guest alexaz]

Hiding an adams apple

Scarves, turtle necks , high collars all work but what I like is a choker.

​I take a black (any color optional) ribbon from like 1 1/2 inch to 2 1/4 inch wide of silk-nylon or something like that ( I prefer something silky to the touch. its more fem ) and cut it about 1 inch longer than the length around my neck.

You can use double stick tape, Velcro or snaps at one end of the ribbon.

Thats it

Wrap it around your neck hiding your adam's apple and your off.

​Of course I have an apple that does not protrude very much and this works for me but if you have one that sticks out a lot you might try adding some padding to the choker- in the front of it or add some applica to it to try to hide the bump.

Hope this helps you to be the you that your looking for.

Love Peace and harmony to all

Alexaz