Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

First time as myself !


Sharon Aml

Recommended Posts

This is the first time writing anything anywhere about myself as a transgender MTF. 

I have struggled with my longing to be feminine since I can remember Within the last year I came out to my wife with some extreme ups and downs.I did not at that time know that I was ready to transition. I told her I needed to explore my feminine side which she finally agreed to.

A little background : We have been together a long time and are soul mates  

I took a few months to dress up. And  along the way did a lot of research. I came to the conclusion that I am transgender. I have been on HRT 4 months now and feel better than ever !

I still do not know where this journey will take me . Like a vacation to a far away place it's going to take awhile to get there . It's just great to be on the road

                Sharon 

Link to comment
  • Replies 54
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Sharon Aml

    23

  • Jani

    12

  • Charlize

    6

  • Susan R

    2

Top Posters In This Topic

  • Forum Moderator

Welcome Sharon!  I'm glad you found us.  Writing for the first time can be stressful, I know!  It sounds like your wife is being supportive of your exploration.  Remember to take it easy as she too is transitioning, in her own way.  

HRT has a way of making things better by calming the noise in our heads.  It did for me.

You don't know where you're headed?  Good. There is so much to learn that each day can be a revelation.  As we progress forward, some find a good place to stop where they and their spouse can peacefully coexist, while others move further along.  Remember there are no rules about what you do or how "far" you go.  My journey is different than yours, and every other person here on the forum and so will your journey.

Please take a deep breath and relax.  You've found a good place.  Please join in the conversation when you can and make a new post if you want. 

Cheers, 

Jani

   

Link to comment
11 minutes ago, Sharon Aml said:

This is the first time writing anything anywhere about myself as a transgender MTF. 

I have struggled with my longing to be feminine since I can remember Within the last year I came out to my wife with some extreme ups and downs.I did not at that time know that I was ready to transition. I told her I needed to explore my feminine side which she finally agreed to.

A little background : We have been together a long time and are soul mates  

I took a few months to dress up. And  along the way did a lot of research. I came to the conclusion that I am transgender. I have been on HRT 4 months now and feel better than ever !

I still do not know where this journey will take me . Like a vacation to a far away place it's going to take awhile to get there . It's just great to be on the road

                Sharon 

Thank you for welcoming me.I have read a lot here and plan to read a lot more .I think this is one of the rest stops on my journey that I really need.Because I do feel the need to communicate with someone else that truly understands what I am going through  Thanks again

                      Sharon

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hi Sharon,

Welcome to TransPulse! Now that you're here, you're not alone anymore. Glad you found us.

 

Lots of love,

Timber Wolf?

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Welcome Sharon.  I remember the joy i found when i found this place.  It has certainly helped and as time passes i still find the connection with others who understand issues i deal with day by day to be remarkably comforting.  Glad you've joined us.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment

Where is a good place to begin ? Do I open up more about myself And which forum is best for new members 

               Sharon

Link to comment
  • Root Admin

Hello Sharon,

Welcome to TransPulse. We have topic specific forums for a variety of issues. If none of them fit your specific question, you may post in the General forum. You can say as much or as little about yourself as you wish. Just don't post any personal information that could identify you. Such as your actual address or phone number, etc. Member safety is a top priority here.

MaryEllen :)

Link to comment

Thanks again for the warm welcome 

This is such a whirlwind of change that it is almost unbelievable When approaching my Wife with my desire to explore my feminine feelings I was scared for what would happen.She cried a lot we talked a lot she let me dress fully wig makeup and clothes 10 moths in  I realized that I am transgendered Fast forward to now into my 4th month of  hormone therapy. I feel better than ever. My wife is very excepting of my journey.My plan is to take it   One day at a time. At this time I don't have any plans of coming out to anyone else. I'm very content and selfish in a way to just be me for me.

Timeline 

1 Began hormone therapy 

2  almost indescribable calm set in. Combo of relief of 40 years of denial And a bit of the estrogen level going up

3 started feeling all  kinds of startling shots of  pain in my breasts and nipples

4   Pain increased in nipples remained constant 

5  very few breakes in the pain  Wowie Don't bump them

 

 

               Sharon

Link to comment

Sorry about that last post I was half asleep rewrite

6 into my 4th month breasts are developing I wore a bra this weekend and filled it.

7 also looking into the mirror I see changes in body shape fat distribution (slightly )

8 still have the warm and fuzzy feeling about the whole journey      

Sorry for the rewrite  

               A little background on my name I was called Sharon Mistakenly as a child Over and over  So I said why not Sharon All My Life.      

                                       Sharon Aml

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

 Thanks for your share.

  Time takes those ouchies away.  I am so glad about that.  I have ocassional times when the girls are a bit sensitive but i'm not in fear of the door anymore.  Fortunately my wife is also still by me.  She has her moments of wanting him back but at the same time will sometimes find me a nice dress on e-bay.  This certainly is an interesting journey.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment

Good day everyone 

I have had a chance to read quite a bit here in the last few days and feel better about myself every day just seeing that so many people have the same thoughts,dreams and goals which I have always held down and perceived to be wrong at some level. With each passing day I feel a certain uforia which you could not explain to anyone that isn't going or has gone through this journey. The journey I'm on if you would have told me a short while ago I would be here I wouldn't have believed you I some how got the courage to speak to my wife  never even thinking about transition. I sought therapy and was referred to a Dr for HRT by chance it was my primary care who trained and practices HRT but doesn't advertise. When I called I asked if my (friend) could come in about HRT  I was told we're not taking any new patients. I couldn't believe the words that came out of my mouth What about me ? Even the doctor couldn't believe what I said. I went for the appointment as I usually do blood work check up standard stuff only this time  I got some additional prescriptions. I was extremely nervous not knowing if I made the right decision. Four months into HRT and landing here has confirmed my Choice

                     Thank you all.  !!!

                           Sharon Aml

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

Hello to all 

 I have been a part of this community for about 

three weeks now. 

Met a lot of wonderfull people.Learned a lot. Plan to learn more. And have discovered live chat and the journey continues 

                 Sharon. Aml

Link to comment

I don't like looking like a man I love looking like myself what I see is woman but am forced by circumstance to be perceived as a man this gift of transition has always been a dream that in a million years I would never believe could actually happen and here I am 

               Sharon Aml

Link to comment
  • 3 weeks later...

Well half way through my 5th month. Still feeling great . The wife not so much ,

Im taking it  one day at a time I’ll keep you posted

                                         Sharon Aml 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Hello Sharon, 

I see you're hanging in there.  Good for you.  In these early days of HRT there is a lot going on in our bodies and mind.  I'm sorry to hear your wife is having a hard time (if I'm reading this correctly).  It is certainly understandable as it does tend to upset the relationship apple cart.  Everyone reacts differently.  My wife, while accepting of my choice, started to question her image of who she grew up to be (not gender related) and now our relationship has evolved.  I hope things work out for you both.  

 

BTW, I like your glasses.  I finally bought a pair of prescription sunglasses in that shape.  I love them!  Its a whole new look. 

 

Cheers, 

Jani

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

That feeling of relief when i was finally free to express myself was wonderful but like you it had difficulties.  My wife also found a new reality unacceptable.  It took what seemed years(and to some extent was) to find peace with me as a woman still in a loving relationship.  Things changed but i have to remember that in our society the first words often spoken about us are "you have a healthy baby...........(boy or girl)".  Chose one.  Transition flies in the face of everyone's expectations.  That doesn't mean to say that i feel in any way that it is wrong, but it is difficult for all of us.  As Kermit the frog said:  It isn't easy being green.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...
  • 2 weeks later...
  • 1 month later...

Hello all 

 

I’m half way into my 8th month of HRT I would say the explosive exuberance has subsided although I am still feeling wonderful about this journey. I’m kind of settling in with my new life and acceptance of who I am very comfortably. My wife is a little bit better as it all becomes more familiar. It’s one day at a time for me and so far they have added up nicely .

   All the best to everyone on their own journey     

             Sharon Aml

 

Link to comment
  • Forum Moderator

Lovely to hear that your wife is sticking it out with you.  i took my wife time as well but with time we are doing better than  ever.

Thanks for sharing your journey.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...

Hello All

I'm into my 10th month on HRT !  I feel more comfortable with myself as each day goes by.

Breast soreness has subsided. I fill my bra now. My wife is definitely on a better path. 

So the journey continues    

                            All the best to everyone on their own journey     

                                                      Sharon Aml

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   3 Members, 0 Anonymous, 114 Guests (See full list)

    • MaeBe
    • Ashley0616
    • KathyLauren
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.

  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.4k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,029
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Selkimur
    Newest Member
    Selkimur
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Anyatimenow
      Anyatimenow
      (23 years old)
    2. Aria00
      Aria00
    3. Ava B.
      Ava B.
      (24 years old)
    4. Claire Heshi
      Claire Heshi
    5. CrystalMatthews0426
      CrystalMatthews0426
      (41 years old)
  • Posts

    • Ashley0616
      I recommend CarComplaints.com | Car Problems, Car Complaints, & Repair/Recall Information. A lot of good information
    • LucyF
      I've got Spironolactone ___mg and Evorel ___mcg Patches (2 a week) going up to ___mg after 4 weeks 
    • Ivy
      Got a new Granddaughter this morning.  Mother and child (and father) are doing fine. This makes 7 granddaughters and one grandson.  I have 2 sons and 6 daughters myself.  And then I  switched teams.  I think this stuff runs in the family. Another hard day for the patriarchy.
    • Ivy
      Like @MaeBe pointed out, Trump won't do these things personally.  I doubt that he actually gives a rat's a$$ himself.  But he is the foot in the door for the others.   I don't really see this.  Personally, I am all in favor of "traditional" families.  I raised my own kids this way and it can work fine.  But I think we need to allow for other variations as well.   One thing working against this now is how hard it is for a single breadwinner to support a family.  Many people (I know some) would prefer "traditional" if they could actually afford it.  Like I mentioned, we raised our family with this model, but we were always right at the poverty level.   I was a "conservative evangelical" for most of my life, actually.  So I do understand this.  Admittedly, I no longer consider myself one. I have family members still in this camp.  Some tolerate me, one actually rejects me.  I assure you the rejection is on her side, not mine.  But, I understand she believes what she is doing is right - 'sa pity though. I mean no insult toward anyone on this forum.  You're free to disagree with me.  Many people do.   This is a pretty complex one.  Socialism takes many forms, many of which we accept without even realizing it.  "Classism" does exist, for what it's worth.  Always has, probably always will.  But I don't feel like that is a subject for this forum.   As for the election, it's shaping up to be another one of those "hold your nose" deals.
    • Ivy
      Just some exerts regarding subjects of interest to me.
    • Ivy
      Yeah.  In my early teens I trained myself out of a few things that I now wish I hadn't.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I was thinking in particular of BLM, who years ago had a 'What We Believe' section that sounded like they were at war with the nuclear family.   I tried to find it. Nope.  Of interest https://www.politifact.com/article/2020/aug/28/ask-politifact-does-black-lives-matter-aim-destroy/   My time is limited and I will try to answer as I can.
    • Ivy
      Well, I suppose it is possible that they don't actually plan on doing what they say.  I'm not too sure I want to take that chance.  But I kinda expect to find out.  Yet, perhaps you're right and it's all just talk.  And anyway, my state GOP is giving me enough to worry about anyway. I remember a time when being "woke" just meant you were paying attention.  Now it means you are the antichrist. I just don't want the government "protecting" me from my personal "delusions."
    • MaeBe
      1.  I think there are some legitimate concern.   2. Thoroughly discussing this will consume many threads.   3. I disagree partially with @MaeBe but there is partial agreement.   4. The context includes what is happening in society that the authors are observing.  It is not an isolated document.   The observation is through a certain lens, because people do things differently doesn't mean they're doing it wrong. Honestly, a lot of the conservative rhetoric is morphing desires of people to be treated with respect and social equity to be tantamount to the absolution of the family, heterosexuality, etc. Also, being quiet and trying to blend in doesn't change anything. Show me a social change that benefits a minority or marginalized group that didn't need to be loud.   5. Trump, if elected, is as likely to spend his energies going after political opponents as he is to implementing something like this.   Trump will appoint people to do this, like Roger Severino (who was appointed before, who has a record of anti-LGBTQ+ actions), he need not do anything beyond this. His people are ready to push this agenda forward. While the conservative right rails about bureaucracy, they intend to weaponize it. There is no question. They don't want to simplify government, they simply want to fire everyone and bring in conservative "warriors" (their rhetoric). Does America survive 4 year cycles of purge/cronyism?   6. I reject critical theory, which is based on Marxism.  Marxism has never worked and never will.  Critical theory has problems which would need time to go into, which I do not have.   OK, but this seems like every other time CRT comes up with conservatives...completely out of the blue. I think it's reference is mostly just to spark outrage from the base. Definitely food thought for a different thread, though.   7. There are groups who have declared war on the nuclear family as problematically patriarchal, and a lot of other terms. They are easy to find on the internet.  This document is reacting to that (see #4 above).   What is the war on the nuclear family? I searched online and couldn't find much other than reasons why people aren't getting married as much or having kids (that wasn't a propaganda from Heritage or opinions pieces from the right that paint with really broad strokes). Easy things to see: the upward mobility and agency of women, the massive cost of rearing children, general negative attitudes about the future, male insecurity, etc. None of this equates to a war on the nuclear family, but I guess if you look at it as "men should be breadwinners and women must get married for financial support and extend the male family line (and to promote "National Greatness") I could see the decline of marriage as a sign of the collapse of a titled system and, if I was a beneficiary of that system or believe that to NOT be tilted, be aggrieved.   8.  Much of this would have to be legislated, and this is a policy documented.  Implementation would  be most likely different, but that does not mean criticism is unwarranted.   "It might be different if you just give it a chance", unlike all the other legislation that's out there targeting LGBTQ+ from the right, these are going to be different? First it will be trans rights, then it will be gay marriage, and then what? Women's suffrage?   I get it, we may have different compasses, but it's not hard to see that there's no place for queer people in the conservative worldview. There seems to be a consistent insistence that "America was and is no longer Great", as if the 1950s were the pinnacle of society, completely ignoring how great America still is and can continue to be--without having to regress society to the low standards of its patriarchal yesteryears.    
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Cadillac parts are pretty expensive, so repairing them costs more.  But they don't seem to break down more than other makes.  Lots of Lincoln models use Ford cars as a base, so you can get parts that aren't much more expensive.    My family has had good luck with "Panther platform" cars.  Ford Crown Victoria, Mercury Marquis, Lincoln Towncar or Continental.  4.6 V8 and 5.0 V8.  Reasonable fuel economy, and fairly durable.  Our county sheriff's office was running Chargers and SUV's for a while, but has gone back to older Crown Victorias for ease of maintenance.  GF rebuilds them here.  But they are getting more scarce, since the newest ones were made in 2011.    1992-1997 years were different than the later years.  1998-2001 they did some changes, and apparently the best years are 2003 to 2011.  Check Craigslist, and also government auctions.  GF has gotten a lot of them at auction, and they can be had in rough-but-running shape for around $1,000.  Ones in great shape can be found in the $5,000+ range.  Good for 200,000 miles without significant rebuilding.  Go through engine and transmission and electrical systems, and they go half a million.    Some Chrysler models are OK.  The 300 mostly has the same engines as the Charger and Challenger, so parts availability is pretty good.  But they tend to get timing issues.  The older Chrysler Sebring convertibles were pretty reliable, sometimes going 200,000 miles without tons of problems, although after that they were pretty much worn out. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I think I have read everything the Southern Baptists have to say on transgender, and it helped convince me they are dead wrong on these issues.  They can be nice people.  I would never join an SBC church.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      You come across as a thoughtful, sweet, interesting and pleasant person.    There are parts of this country, and more so the world, where evangelicals experience a great deal of finger wagging.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      It has been an interesting experience being in a marriage in a Christian faith community, yet being intersex/trans.  I stay pretty quiet, and most have kind of accepted that I'm just the strange, harmless exception.  "Oh, that's just Jen.  Jen is...different."  I define success as being a person most folks just overlook. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      Well, I live in an area with a lot of Southern Baptists, Evangelicals, etc...  We've experienced our share of finger-wagging, as the "standard interpretation" of Scripture in the USA is that the Bible only approves of "one man, one woman" marriage.  My faith community is mostly accepted here, but that has taken time and effort.  It can be tough at times to continue to engage with culture and the broader population, and avoid the temptation to huddle up behind walls like a cult.    Tolerance only goes so far.  At one point, my husband was asked to run for sheriff.  He declined, partly because an elected official with four wives would have a REALLY tough time.  (Of course, making way less than his current salary wasn't an option either). 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      My bone structure is far more female than male.  I can't throw like a guy, which has been observed by guys numerous times, and moving like a woman is more natural.  It just is.  I'm not going out of my way to act in a fem. way, as you say, but I am letting go of some of the 'I am not going to move like that because I am a guy' stuff I have defensively developed.  The other breaks through anyway - there were numerous looks from people at work when I would use gestures that are forbidden to men, or say something spontaneously no guy would ever say.   At one point, maybe a year or more ago, I said it was unfair for people to think they were dealing with a man when they were actually dealing with a woman.    Girl here.  'What is a woman' is a topic for another day.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...