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Naomi Knowles

A possible impasse?

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Naomi Knowles

I've been consulting with a counsellor with knowledge and experience of gender/sex related topics, and I have some considerations regarding a desire to eventually start HRT to make a full MtF transition, and how gender dysphoria is diagnosed by clinics.

I already had a good idea of what I wanted to do, but I felt the need to make sure I wasn't under any hidden personal bias in doing so, and my time with counselling has ultimately strengthened my resolve to make a full transition to female. But exploring my own feelings and reflecting it off a professional, I seem to have a weird outlook where I don't HATE my male body, but I definitely don't like it either (and no amount of crunches/press ups/ hours on a rowing machine will fix it). Like a sort of picture on a tilt, if you will. It's not enough to feel female inside, I have a yearning to be as female as possible.

I bring this up, because I am aware that Gender Identity Clinics will likely be looking down a checklist for very specific markers/flags, gender dysphoria being one of those, but what degree of gender dysphoria, is considered medically significant? Is there even such thing as mild or severe dysphoria? Am I creating a hurdle in my head that doesn't exist here?

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Noami we all come to our journey from our personal perspective.  Some have a strong body dysphoria, others not so.  Some have a strong social dysphoria while others have a strong yearning as you say.  We're all different.  That's okay.  I am sure that your GIC counselor understands this dynamic.  A good counselor will not give you an answer but will help you find the solution that will make you whole.  My recommendation is to be as open and honest as you possibly can in order to gain the most benefit and fastest results.



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Guest Rachel Gia

Eventually I just came to the conclusion I just could not pass as male and I could not be that guy that women wanted in the long run.

During my intake I just started talking and might have gone off the pages of what they had on their list but it was heart felt and true. I asked about coucellors but I could not afford it and I guess it was obvious who I was inside because I was accepted as a trans care patient.

The evaluation with my transition doctor was over about 3 months with an appointment every 2 weeks.

I did buy a new pair of women's jeans for the first apt. and pretty much dressed casual fem for every meeting.

I had also started hair removal and been to a support group before meeting her

In my mind , few do this or will go through the pain and expense unless it's important to them and there is no where else to go but forward into their true self.

I hope it works out for you!




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Hi Naomi


Dysphoria is a funny thing, and seems to vary greatly between different people. For myself, I too do not suffer much from body dysphoria, and live with a male body, but socially in the past I have often felt really ill and nauseous in typically male situations. This has led to problems as I have had to break out, and have severely strained friendships. I now live a far more feminine lifestyle, and dress accordingly. This has made me far more relaxed and easier to get on with. At work I used to have major conflict issues with several people, which mostly dissapeared when I became more me. I think, in reality, I am mentally far more female than male. I agree with Jani - my advice is to be open and honest. There is not a fixed process which entails every MTF having surgery. It is more a process for helping you find who you are, and where you are going.



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Jamie james

Great morning,

I feel very fluid, there are days I don't mind my male self and other days she wants out very badly.    It can be very confusing.    I feel you must do what makes you , you .  


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Naomi Knowles

You all make excellent points: I suppose i'm over-analyzing the process. The only way I can know for certain, is to discuss with the GIC honestly, and go from there.


Looking forward to it!

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NONE of us have everything (thank heaven) but ALL of us have many of the parts of the gender incongruence package of life we experience.  It is not a matter of how much of a part or how many parts we can tick off a check list.  We can easily over-analyze ourselves and chase our dysphoria into a corner or a closet and beat it with a coat hanger in hopes it will go away.  It is not a matter of "do we have it?" it is a matter of how to deal with what we have.  Today, many doctors prescribe HRT as a diagnostic tool to see what it will do, knowing for some it will not be effective one way or another for controlling their needs, and for others it will turn on lights in their lives, If the person does not need it or benefit from it, the HRT is withdrawn with minimal residual effect and other methods are explored to stabilize things. All of us have different journeys.

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