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By Alex C · Posted
Hey I feel that way. Jackie is right on money....Sleep and I good shave, face and legs always make me feel better. Get Better -
By Alex C · Posted
Hey Tariana. Yeah live sucks, and I don't your age or your various circumstance. However, We all face challenges,esp as a trans person. You can either keep moving on (this is a great place ) bye discovering and find new support Ave. Or find your own strength. I know that sounds like B.S , but we ( bi-straight, trans, normal weird, etc) have it..I can say I being in yr shoes. Actually, I was properly worse off, but I fig a way out and if I can do anyone can. I MEAN ANYONE. Good Luck, Be proud, stay save and kick Ass -
By Vivian319 · Posted
I definitely am setting a short term goal to confront my wife about this. That’s going to be a tough conversation! I keep running thoughts through my head about how it will go. It seems that the only time I feel comfortable with myself is when I am alone, so I have to open up soon. I can’t keep living like this. I have to be able to live on my terms at home. At least when I have opened up to my wife, I will be able to hopefully be more open about my identity in my home. Then it will only come down to the path forward as far as my career is concerned. Strange thing is, I’m not so sure that my career is the most important thing on my mind right now, given my internal struggles. Sounds a bit irrational to me on the practical end, but I can only be human, right? -
By Josie Beth · Posted
Well the coffee shop was really nice today. It was a little rushed but fun talking to some people who actually wanted to hang out and just talk. There was a nice guy at the counter who was our barista and his husband is trying to buy a building nearby for some kind of reason that I didn’t catch but my coffee was delicious. We made plans to hang out north of town soon and have a home cooked meal. I guess once the ladies I met get a cousin settled in. It was refreshing to talk in a relaxed setting about paranormal things and astrology for a change instead of all the issues that have been going on. And it’s always good to make new friends who know what it’s like to be where I am. -
By Tariane90 · Posted
I don't post here very often because I've gotten so caught up with all the stress and nonsense lately. Ive made some not so great choices in my life more specifically with money when I was younger, which seem to have caught up with me ( choices that have affected me directly) I'm really overwhelmed and don't know what to do. I'm trying so hard to make better decisions but am feeling as though I'm at a cross roads. My living situation and work situation is not great and after a recent visit to see family in another state I've been feeling extremely dysphoric to the point where I procrastinate going places sometimes which is something I hadn't experienced no where close to this degree in quite a while. I don't really have a lot of support in my life and I feel really alone. There are things I would like to experience and accomplish yet I don't have the slightest clue as to which avenues I should take to accomplish these goals. I try to reach out to people to no avail. I don't know. I mean this in a few aspects of my life. I've been really drained and tired lately and have been sleeping whenever possible. I'm sorry I know this is all over the place and probably doesn't make any sense what I'm saying. I'm just venting. -
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By Belle · Posted
I don't hold mine at fault for this either. She has told me exactly that. I really wish she was though. I'm totally attracted to her. I've fantasized about it. Thank you Shawna. That's helpful to hear. -
By Belle · Posted
That is so true NB! I'm even guilty of expecting perfection from others. But as I've become more aware of how I fall short I've grown in my ability to offer grace. Life is so messy, and the more we try to fit it in a box the bigger the mess explodes. -
By NB Adult · Posted
The church, I'm referring to the universal body of believers in Christ who accept the bible as the inspired word of God, tends to see things based on scripture as black and white. In a sense it can be very problematic as it occasionally creates a polemic relationship between them and those outside the church, a rather unbecoming, we the saved, and they the unsaved situation, and even more unfortunately they tend to project it. This of course is not at all what Christ is like and certainly doesn't reflect his will. Sadly those that inadvertantly indulge in that kind of behavior unwittingly create a negative view of the church and of Christ. People whose lives are totally ensconced in what I call churchianity become rather ingrown as a group and miss the point of being gatherers and become scaterers. I love my fellow Christians, but for this reason alone I no longer attend the corporate church services. Not all churches are so rigid, but then many of the more accepting churches no longer preach the Gospel of Christ so they are worthless as well. Sin is a word that means to fall short of absolute perfection, we're all sinners, Christ paid the price for it in our behalf. Bottom line is that's all you need to know and thankfully accept as sufficient for your own lives. -
By ShawnaLeigh · Posted
This is exactly the point. You didn’t know fully what you were. How were you even able to explain it all to her? This is how my therapist explained it to me. Yes we knew “something” but it was not entirely “this” when we married. So it’s not your fault that you figured more out about yourself after the fact. I sadly can not claim this though. Being honest with myself I knew A long time before. I was just determined to “not go there” and do I hid. I’m guilty of that. In this I am truly sorry to my wife. But I have not said I’m sorry for simply wanting to be me. Once Zi knew Zi couldn’t live anymore hiding. I will not apologize for being the way I am. I don’t hold my wife at fault for not being a lesbian and therefore staying married to me. She is not and will not cross that line. She is who she is and feels and wants what she feels and wants. As she said the same to me about me. Unfortunately her understanding does not equal her acceptance. Bella, honey, it’s not your fault. I swear to you it’s not. -
By Belle · Posted
It is so hard to not feel like it is all my fault. It is so hard to not feel like it is my fault... like I should not try to explore, or like I should have told her before we were married. But I had suppressed it so deeply that I did not know what I was. Once I finally figured it out after so much counseling for depression and sex addiction everything changed. Everything was so abundantly clear. I keep remembering more from my childhood, like how I always identified with my mom and felt much more comfortable mimicking her speech and behavior. And so many things I believe others noticed but I had no clue about. I have to keep reminding myself about these things. Shawna I cherish your words and experience. You are so uplifting to me! -
By AnAnxiousMess · Posted
Thanks very much, Jackie. I think that's likely it—that your perception of yourself also tanks when feeling unwell—but I thought it worth asking all the same, as I have a close friend (AMAB) who is genderfluid and feels most themselves when on the femme side of things, and when sick feels distinctly stuck in a masc state of being. It's just one more wrinkle to dysphoria, which so often feels like a never-ending string of brambles one has to navigate. -
By ShawnaLeigh · Posted
You are not failing at life. Or marriage. Or being a parent. Your wife and church are failing you. im sorry. I know they all have a lot of meaning to you but from an outside perspective that’s what I am seeing. None of this is your fault. None! You are who you are and have a right to be just like anyone else! They are the ones with the issues not you. unfortunately you are the one who must pay the penalties. It’s not right but that is how it is. It sucks and I’m sorry for it all. It breaks my heart. 😢 -
By Belle · Posted
I hate the idea of getting a lawyer. I have thought about it though. I emailed my therapist and told her what is going on. She said she would help me get involved in the community. I am thankful for that. There is a vibrant community where I live, I just haven't been able to get into it. I have been in bed all day. I'm failing at life. -
By Rosa B · Posted
I came out about a month ago to just three friends. Two of them have mostly gotten used to my new pronouns, except for one. I got them used to it by this method; whenever they get the pronouns wrong I wait to see if they correct themselves and if they don't and move on to saying something else i let them know they got it wrong, this has been working so far. But the one friend says that me correcting him is annoying and that he won't even try to get the pronouns right if I keep correcting him. It doesn't feel right to just do nothing, but I also don't want to annoy him. He says that he'll get used to it on his own, but I don't understand how since he won't know when he gets it wrong.
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