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Lucy

So many dots..........

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Lucy
Posted (edited)

Hi all, nice to be here with you all. 

Isn’t it strange how life has a habit of biting you in the rear just when you think you’ve outrun the demons. 

 

Just 2yrs about at the ripe old age of 48 enough dots were joined in my mind for me to find myself staring down the long tunnel that is my past life and Bang! It hit me like a truck. Left me mentally struggling for a while and scared the crap out of me. Questions like; how did I not know, what’s does this mean for me and my lovely family. How will I cope?  I’m a man, this can’t be happening to me. And so on.....

After some emergency counseling I calmed down and started to accept this is part of me (or just simply me) and it’s not the end of the world. 

Jump forwards 2 yrs and find myself going down a rabbit hole yet again as dsyphoria has ramped up again. Bit of a panic but trying to remain positive. Weird new development is having shaved my legs recently, I swear for the first time in my adult life they felt like mine. Where have they been ?  Just did t see them or feel them as mine for some reason. So where next?  Therapist booked for a few weeks and hope to really start getting to the bottom of all this. Scared but strangely euphoric that if I could get this right, I might just be able to be the person I think I’m meant to be. In addition my wife is fully in on the whole thing and we are sharing the journey which is helpful for both of us. Nice to meet you all. Lucy x 

Edited by Cyndee
fixed a few typos

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Jani

Hello Lucy!  Well you're certainly not too old for this revelation.  That's nice that your wife is behind you.  I think talking with a therapist will be good to help you come to a clear point.  Dysphoria does have a way of creeping up on us at the worse times.   Please read all you can and join in the conversation.

 

Cheers, Jani

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Lucy
Just now, Jani said:

Dysphoria does have a way of creeping up on us at the worse times.

Thanks Jani, appreciate the kind words. Yes that pesky dysphoria does pop up out of nowhere and can cause some anxiety. And you’re right about my wife behind me. She’s had a tough time getting to grips with all this but she’s been a rock, for which I thank her enormously. Lots to learn but I see all this as a marathon and not a sprint.   

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Timber Wolf

Hi Lucy,

Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug,

Timber Wolf 🐺🐾

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Lucy
4 hours ago, Timber Wolf said:

Hi Lucy,

Welcome to Transpulse. I'm glad you're here!

 

Lots of love and a big welcome hug,

Timber Wolf 🐺🐾

Thank you

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DeeDee

Hi Lucy - pleased to meet you. Seeing yourself minus the body hair can be a genuine revelation! Maintaining it can be expensive and time consuming though, good luck on your journey!

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Lucy

Thanks everyone. Appreciate the warm welcome. I’ll keep you all posted on where this all goes. I’m sure you’ll all have your own experiences that I can learn from. It nice how just being open about oneself feels light a door opening that has been firmly bolted for so long. Thanks again. Lucy x 

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