Having opposite gender dreams.

[ShawnaLeigh]

I don’t seem to remember many of my dreams.  Most are not gender specific either.  I don’t see myself nor is there any context to say I was a women or a male in my dream. 
I have had a few though that was definitely feminine.  One that is reoccurring and with doubt me as a women, and one that scared the hell out of me.  
I’m not asking for opinions on any meanings.  Just sharing.  
The two I recall were very self explanatory.  
The one I really like is a short scene where my wife and I are getting ready for a formal company dinner party.  She is in the bathroom finishing her make up and looking gorgeous.  
I am in the bedroom looking at her through the open door and I am frustrated with not being able to find anything to wear.  At this point in the dream it’s fairly non feminine or so I think.  She suggests that “You should wear the light blue one.  You always kill it in that one”. I agree and put “it” on but don’t see anything.  
She comes out of the bathroom a smiles over my shoulder as to look into the full length mirror on our open closet door.  I look too.  I am absolutely blown away by the tall curvy gorgeous brunette in a light blue formal and sorta risky dress staring back at me, with my mouth wide open in shock of how pretty and feminine I look.  Somehow perfect hair and make up.  She smiles at my response to myself and say “told ya so...” and then the dream ends.  
I have this dream over n over.  Probably a half dozen times.  On and of for the last few years. 
Then nothing for a month or so. I so want to dream in girl mode but not sure how or why Zi don’t. 
 

The only other dream was more a nightmare and involved hate crimes against me.  My skin crawls just thinking of it and it truly scares me.  Luckily only one time.  
 

Anyone want to share your dreams ?

[ToniTone]

I also am not aware of my gender in my dreams. They're in the first person from my perspective, so I can't see my body. 

 

One dream I recognized my female body. I was in a psych ward and panicking because there was a cross outside my window. 

 

Another where I recognized I was a woman, I got attacked and knocked out on the street. It's a reoccurring nightmare for me because I used to be a Thai boxer... 

 

~Toni

[ShawnaLeigh]

11 hours ago, ToniTone said:

I also am not aware of my gender in my dreams. They're in the first person from my perspective, so I can't see my body. 

 

One dream I recognized my female body. I was in a psych ward and panicking because there was a cross outside my window. 

 

Another where I recognized I was a woman, I got attacked and knocked out on the street. It's a reoccurring nightmare for me because I used to be a Thai boxer... 

 

~Toni

Those are indeed scary if you ask me.  Though being into Thai Boxing I would of thought that dream turned out differently.  Subconscious fear can be a killer too.

 

After pondering this topic lately and then posting my  favorite dream I must of kept something stirring in my subconscious.

I actually had another last night.  But this one was new.  Nothing scary or shocking.  More of a regular moment in time just having a random conversation with my wife in our kitchen.  Standing at different sides of our island bar I was watching her speak to me.  I don't recall what she said but as I looked into the mirror on the wall beyond her I saw myself in make up, hair up, kind of messy but still very cute. It was morning still (I assumed) drinking coffee and we were making a plan to go out shopping I finally heard.  I felt subconscious though looking at myself.  At once feeling happy how good I looked even in the morning but afraid like I have not come to terms of coming out yet.   I was clocking myself and was kind of just trying to play it cool.   She was smiling and talking and acted as everything was natural.

Then it flashed to us in the isles of some store.  Probably Walmart.  Her mother was there and my two kids.  They were younger.  No one treated me differently.  But then her mother gave me a weird look like something was off with me and she couldn't figure it out and I started to panic.  It ended there.

Weird.

I am hoping my brain is trying to tell me to keep moving forward.  Eventually things will be ok.

I dunno.  Dreams are weird. 

[TommieAnne]

I may have mentioned this before, but in my dreams I'm either genderless  (just "me") or female. In the instances which included sexual things, those used to disturb me a lot, although not anymore, as I have made peace with my heart and about 90% accept myself (there are still some struggles yet).

Wilder are the dreams in which I can fly, usually hovering just off the ground swimming in the air, but also able to soar over buildings and trees. Yet everything in the dream seems, normal, natural, everyday kind of things. People will converse with me as I paddle along the sidewalk, etc.

More disturbing about my dreams is the difficulty discerning what is dream and what is reality on awakening - in those dreams where I am female, I am often shocked when I awaken and find I've got male parts.

[ShawnaLeigh]

1 hour ago, TammyAnne said:

More disturbing about my dreams is the difficulty discerning what is dream and what is reality on awakening - in those dreams where I am female, I am often shocked when I awaken and find I've got male parts.

For me its quite the opposite.

I know full well I still have all those parts when I wake and sadly trying to grasp at the dream state to still be fully transitioned.  Like I am losing a part of myself I just had a moment or two ago.

[TommieAnne]

44 minutes ago, Nivegnal said:

For me its quite the opposite.

I know full well I still have all those parts when I wake and sadly trying to grasp at the dream state to still be fully transitioned.  Like I am losing a part of myself I just had a moment or two ago.

I probably stated that poorly. I believe - that is I know - myself to be female in many of my dreams. The shock and upset is waking to find parts that I was sure weren't there and don't belong.

[ShawnaLeigh]

Gotcha.   Yea it can be a slap in the face sometimes.  

[NB Adult]

Like TammyAnne I have had several dreams where I can fly which suggests we are somehow feeling an internal sense of euphoria and liberation. Makes one think of how a rather disgusting little larva spends so much time in a cocoon and later, after much struggle, emerges as a beautiful and graceful butterfly. 

 

My other dreams in the past were about cooking up stories and artful ways of bringing my spouse on board my transition train without being entirely too deceitful.

[ShawnaLeigh]

1 hour ago, NB Adult said:

Like TammyAnne I have had several dreams where I can fly which suggests we are somehow feeling an internal sense of euphoria and liberation. Makes one think of how a rather disgusting little larva spends so much time in a cocoon and later, after much struggle, emerges as a beautiful and graceful butterfly. 

This is a beautiful way to think of it.  I had not thought about it that way.

Though I do not have many "I can fly" dreams, Ive had a few in the past.   I have had several with other specially inhuman abilities, that honestly I wish could be true too.  LOL

[Maid In Bedlam]

On 10/24/2019 at 1:33 PM, TammyAnne said:

I may have mentioned this before, but in my dreams I'm either genderless  (just "me") or female. In the instances which included sexual things, those used to disturb me a lot, although not anymore, as I have made peace with my heart and about 90% accept myself (there are still some struggles yet).

 

 

Yes you did mention dreams it in another thread tammy. I am glad you over it mostly now. You had me concerned that your flights into  subconscious were  disturbing. So yay to that.

 

Not that i can recall i have ever flown in a dream. Well excepting if i have been thinking about icarus before bed and that didnt end well. If you know the outcome. (No need for a spoiler alert i think)

 

Not that i think about Icarus much but i suppose i must have.

 

I suppose the sense of well being gets everyone diffrent. It quite a personal thing. Effected but life events etc.

 

I believe dreams are just the minds way of putting events in some sort  of order so they can be quickly referenced at a later date.

I have some really crazy ones that bare no meaning to what happened that day. But they all fit in somewhere.

 

For instance. The other day i was in a shop with my partner. We looked at Tee shirts. Like pop groups etc.  However i dreamed that night and for some strange reason i  fixated on a Sarah Brightman teeshirt. This was the main reference in the dream.  However there was certainly no teeshirt mentioning sarah brightman and i know for a fact i would have not brought a teeshirt with her on it.  Therefore i just assume my brain is just making a connection.. Sarah Brightman. files in the music catagory. Just as a general reference. But why her? See they say The lord works in myseterious ways but i dont think he or she is a patch on how the mind works sometimes.

 

Im sure many love the works of Sarah brightman but she just isnt my cup of tea

 

 

On 10/24/2019 at 2:45 PM, TammyAnne said:

that is I know - myself to be female in many of my dreams. The shock and upset is waking to find parts that I was sure weren't there and don't belong.

 

 

Just a question Tammy as im intrigued now.  How do you know your female in your dreams?

 

If i can tell you why i ask it may make it clearer. As I have mentioned before most of my dreams are me now being female orientated. Such as what im wearing and what i do within that dream. However I could still have male genitals. But it doesnt cross my mind to look in or outside the dream.  How do you assertain in your dreams you are female. Is it just a subconscious feeling. Like a dreram in a dream? I guess you can have them.

 

This is a quite personal question and i will not be offended if you choose your right to not giving an answer. Its your mind and your dream.  Im just interested ?

[ShawnaLeigh]

Mine have seemed to blossoms lately. 
before a few in my lifetime.  One reoccurring but mostly just random stuff about random stuff 

Since I have truly started to take steps towards my transition and start focusing on my mental health in this matter I seem to be having more self identity type female dreams.  Like an awaking inside myself.  
They are still about random stuff.  Daily grind.  Conversation.  But they feel so different now.  Something right up front and noticeable to me.  I don’t question it as non male or being female.  It just feels like the me inside is out there.  
Im not sure if I am making any sense. 

[TommieAnne]

6 hours ago, Maid In Bedlam said:

 

 

Yes you did mention dreams it in another thread tammy. I am glad you over it mostly now. You had me concerned that your flights into  subconscious were  disturbing. So yay to that.

 

Not that i can recall i have ever flown in a dream. Well excepting if i have been thinking about icarus before bed and that didnt end well. If you know the outcome. (No need for a spoiler alert i think)

 

Not that i think about Icarus much but i suppose i must have.

 

I suppose the sense of well being gets everyone diffrent. It quite a personal thing. Effected but life events etc.

 

I believe dreams are just the minds way of putting events in some sort  of order so they can be quickly referenced at a later date.

I have some really crazy ones that bare no meaning to what happened that day. But they all fit in somewhere.

 

For instance. The other day i was in a shop with my partner. We looked at Tee shirts. Like pop groups etc.  However i dreamed that night and for some strange reason i  fixated on a Sarah Brightman teeshirt. This was the main reference in the dream.  However there was certainly no teeshirt mentioning sarah brightman and i know for a fact i would have not brought a teeshirt with her on it.  Therefore i just assume my brain is just making a connection.. Sarah Brightman. files in the music catagory. Just as a general reference. But why her? See they say The lord works in myseterious ways but i dont think he or she is a patch on how the mind works sometimes.

 

Im sure many love the works of Sarah brightman but she just isnt my cup of tea

 

 

 

 

Just a question Tammy as im intrigued now.  How do you know your female in your dreams?

 

If i can tell you why i ask it may make it clearer. As I have mentioned before most of my dreams are me now being female orientated. Such as what im wearing and what i do within that dream. However I could still have male genitals. But it doesnt cross my mind to look in or outside the dream.  How do you assertain in your dreams you are female. Is it just a subconscious feeling. Like a dreram in a dream? I guess you can have them.

 

This is a quite personal question and i will not be offended if you choose your right to not giving an answer. Its your mind and your dream.  Im just interested ?

I don't really know how I know I'm female in some dreams, many dreams.

It may just be a manifestation or fulfillment of my desires. But in those dreams I am seen by others to be female.

In real life, almost anyone who has been intimate with me "knew" that about me looking into my eyes. I don't know how they know, it's a human connection thing I guess.

The dreams that disturbed me most (thankfully haven't happened in a long while) were those in which I was still male but having intimate relations with a male friend. Those left me feeling very upset on awakening.

It's an area I'm still digging through. I'll see how things develop.

[Maid In Bedlam]

49 minutes ago, TammyAnne said:

 

It may just be a manifestation or fulfillment of my desires. But in those dreams I am seen by others to be female.

 

 

So we are on the same page then! You dont really know but you assume because of actions and feelings you are. You just threw me a bit when you said about finding parts that shouldnt be there. Im up to speed now.

 

Much the same as anyone who dreams regardless of being female or male. Its Irelevant in the dream you just are how you percieve yourself in a concious state and this is projected into the subconscious mind.

 

Basically if you look into a mirror in your dream you take the role of what you see and because its your dream you to a point control what others see in your dream.

 

I have been binge watching supernatural the last few weeks and persoanlly from my dreams i have had involving me and the winchesters I could perhaps write them another season. I wont tell you what me and Dean got upto in one ? Its not a porn site ? Lets just say That one did dwell for a day or so in a good way.

 

Not that i think hes Gougeous or anything. Come on, Give an old girl something to smile about ☺️

 

54 minutes ago, TammyAnne said:

The dreams that disturbed me most (thankfully haven't happened in a long while) were those in which I was still male but having intimate relations with a male friend. Those left me feeling very upset on awakening.

It's an area I'm still digging through. I'll see how things develop.

 

Thats great. I wouldnt let dreams bother you. We all do however. I have had a few rough ones to and upon waking they just dwell for a day or so. especially if they involve someone from your past or present.

[Dana Michelle]

I am often aware of gender in my dreams and often have dreams where I see and feel male genitals. I'm not sure I've ever had a dream with female genitals. Sometimes when I am dreaming I am wondering why I can't have female genitals in my dream. It is an environment created by my subconscious so why can't it create the environment I want? I've heard people can control dreams when they are aware it is a dream but I have not been able to have female genitals in my dreams.

I have dreams where I am simply aware that I appear male or female but don't see or feel any evidence of it. I just "know". I don't remember dreams well enough so I don't know how often I "appear" male or how often I "appear" female.

 

[ShawnaLeigh]

I haven't touched on this in a while but I have noticed that in the last couple months since being put on HRT and letting my female personality start to emerge outwardly I have had several basic nothing dreams where I am undoubtedly a female.  Be it what I was doing, wearing,  or how others had treated me.   But more so its how I felt in the dream.  

I have yet to experience anything erotic or sexual but I am in a place in my life where that has become unimportant to me.  I am sure it will not always be the case but for now I have far greater things to focus on then that.

 

[SaraAW]

I had my first experience of this last night. I don’t really remember what the dream was about, but I remember seeing my reflection in the mirror and I looked very feminine. It was just my face in the mirror. I stared smiling for a bit. I even woke up smiling. I look forward to a time in the future when my reflection awake matches the one in my dream. 

[secondlook]

I started having dreams where I was female many years ago. At the time it shocked me, I was so thoroughly brainwashed that I believed I was 0% feminine. Somehow the fact that they were mundane dreams and non-erotic was even more disturbing.

 

As the years went on and they happened with more regularity, I just shrugged it off as one of those weird things where dreams don't always make sense. But there was a nagging feeling in my mind, something I didn't really let myself focus on consciously, that I was more "me" in those dreams than when I was awake.

 

Now I'm grateful that my own mind was sending me a message through those dreams, I would've never figured out who I really am without them.

[Sally Stone]

I have often wondered if the things we experience in our dreams are a measure of where we are on the gender spectrum.  So many, report that they are always women in their dreams.  I have had countless dreams where I was clearly dressed as a woman, but in every one it was clear I was playing the role.  Ultimately, I have decided not to let images created by my self conscious mind determine the true nature of my gender. Dreams after all, are just dreams, it's real life that helps us determine who we really are...at least that's what I believe.

 

Hugs,

 

Sally 

[TommieAnne]

Many of my dreams I am female, in most of the remaining dreams I am genderless. Very rarely do I dream I am male.

Although when younger, I dreamed aliens abducted me and "fixed" me so that I had a vagina.

TA

[soyangela]

Interesting topic. In the past (while still in denial) I had dreams where I was in guy clothes then people started to snicker/comment, at least that's what I felt, thought?, all of a sudden I was in a dress or some other feminine attire. The other one was I was the women in bed doing ahem things with another person. That one really shocked me. I woke up thinking whoa what is going on. I haven't had those dreams in a very long time. One dream I just had that I have never had before was 2 nights ago. My wife (not acting like her real self) tells me she is leaving me. Going to be with a real man. Then the scene shifts to my daughter sitting on a chair next to me crying asking my wife why she is leaving us then turns to me saying I can't believe what mom told me about you. I knew exactly what she meant. I turn to my wife and ask why she outed me to my daughter. My wife smirks and says I deserve it. Again that is NOTHING like my wife. I woke up very sad and almost in tears. I had my therapist session this afternoon. My therapist said its my subconscious mind, that I am still afraid to lose my wife. I guess that little nagging feeling is still there even though she has been so strong and supportive.

 

Hugs,

Angela

[MetaLicious]

In the majority of my dreams, my gender isn't part of it.  There's no gender markers of any kind, I'm just... me.  Once in a while, I would dream that I was a girl, and each time the feelings were the same.  I would experience profound relief (at last!) and intense joy, a happiness matched in real life only when I met my wife.  Each time, waking up was a huge letdown, having to painfully return to my reality, keenly feeling the loss of being whole.

 

Such a dream is what finally prompted me to begin my transition.  I dreamed that I woke from sleep to discover that I had Natalie Sidserf's face. I checked below to see if the transformation was, erm, complete, but it wasn't.  And I didn't care.  I got ready for work and took off, eager to show everyone my new looks. When I woke up for realsies, I felt that old loss, but instead of being resigned to my fate, I decided to take fate into my own hands.

 

I've since had a few more dreams where I have an identifiable gender.  Two of them, I was a girl but just going about my normal business, and in one I was a male celebrating my newly acquired stash of spironolactone.

[TommieAnne]

19 hours ago, soyangela said:

Interesting topic. In the past (while still in denial) ... I was the women in bed doing ahem things with another person. That one really shocked me. I woke up thinking whoa what is going on...

 

Hugs,

Angela

During most of my life I was also heavily in denial. Repressed to the point that I really didn't understand myself.

I also had dreams like the one you describe above, continued having them as recently as two years ago. And yes, it was very upsetting to me.

Until I managed to pry open my repressed doors, let the light shine in on dark places. Now things are much better, I feel less anxious and afraid, I'm accepting of my sexual and emotional self, making strides towards being the person I am and building my life the way I want it to be.

TA