Gendered correctly three time. One very rude.

[ShawnaLeigh]

In my efforts to present more as myself I have broken out of the “only in the privacy of our own home” rule set in place by my wife.   Her criteria is if I start to present fully female full time we start our paperwork for divorce.   
So I had decided to at least go to all my medical and therapy appointments as “me” but not present all day long as of yet.  
 
So I get to my therapy appointment in the nick of time but luckily I found a close parking spot and drove right in.  Trust me this is highly unusual as it’s a nightmare to park near anyplace you need to go in down town Montpellier.  Apparently some guy in a pickup was racing around to try n get this spot but I did not know this.  As I got out of the car to put money in the meter he pulls up and calls me a “Stupid Punt” but with a C.  I was very shocked for this to be my very first gendered correctly moment and quite POed.  I did not say a word but chose to thank him with very animated sign language.   

I don’t feel swearing is proper for a lady.  Lol

So I go I the back entrance and met a guy at the door who had a leg brace and he opened it for me and said hi.  He took the elevator but I always walk up the four flights.  As I reach the top he steps out and sees me again and runs over to get the door and again opens it for me in which I say.  “ Wow that elevator is slow” and then thanked him.  He laughs and says “Have a nice day Miss.”.    

After my appointment I had to swing by the drug store to pick up my lady meds.  I used the drive through like normal and have been going here for 12 years for my prescriptions.  I have seen these ladies for years.  So she asks the name and birthdate snd  I tell her my info as usual.  She is having a hard time finding it and starts to ask me when my brother Shawn called it in, then she paused and looks at me and says “Wait. Are you Shawn?!?!”  Which I said yes and added “That’s what the medicine is for.” And we both laugh.    She kept saying she had no idea it was me and then proceeded to tell me how much she liked my hair color.   “You just look so cute I thought you were his younger sister.”   Which made me smile ear to ear.  

So I had three gendered correctly encounters in the span of 1.5 hours.  My second time outside the house.  
Id give up the rude one though.  I didn’t care to be called that word.  

[Susan R]

It’s a wonderful feeling (with the exception of your confrontation). Please be careful when being confronted by irrational and immature individuals like that.  You definately don’t want either of you being a statistic.

 

As I’ve mentioned to you before, I truly doubt you will have much misgendering in public and accept that most people see you as a woman.  It’s affirming as anything and never seems to get old.  I’m really happy this is happening for you and it’s likely going to continue much more often as you blossom.

 

My Best,

Susan R?

[Belle]

5 hours ago, ShawnaLeigh said:

I was very shocked for this to be my very first gendered correctly moment and quite POed.

? At least you will always remember it!

 

You've started the ball rolling now. Have fun being yourself in public. You know there's no going back now right?! ? It feels too wonderful.

 

And it is totally awesome that you are passing in public already! Are you using your female voice?

 

One thing I love about going out as myself is that even though I know I don't pass, most people treat me well, especially women. That affirmation is euphoric all on its own.

 

Belle ❤

[ShawnaLeigh]

I appreciate the nice comments. I do feel confident in my female look now since I have finally seen that women from the inside come forth and I even show pride in myself.  I’ve always have been an overly confident person though so this is not new to me.  Lol

 

[ShawnaLeigh]

35 minutes ago, Belle said:

And it is totally awesome that you are passing in public already! Are you using your female voice?

I’m not trying overly hard to speak differently as my voice therapist has my baseline voice at gender neutral.  I do feel I emit a more feminine voice and somewhat softer then before. I was told by my VT that I sound somewhat shy with being extremely confident in action.  
But I do have lots of work still in that.  

[SaraAW]

Shawna, so exciting!  Sounds like a great time out, with that one awkward experience. So happy for you. Hugs!

[Jackie C.]

It feels good doesn't it? Just to be treated like one of the girls.

 

I had the same problem with my pharmacist a couple of months back. She was just having the toughest time finding me in the system until I finally took pity on her and said, "Jackie (because her name is Jackie), sweetie, you know darn well who I am." You could SEE the switch flip over as she put everything together. Glorious.

She's much better about it now.

 

I still get a bump whenever a random stranger treats me just like any other woman. I hope that feeling never goes away.

 

Hugs!

[MetaLicious]

12 hours ago, Susan R said:

... I truly doubt you will have much misgendering in public and accept that most people see you as a woman.

This is truer than I would have thought possible.  I ran up to the store last night, and I was making no effort at passing - I'm not wearing any makeup and my clothes are somewhat shapeless.  A panhandler outside says, "Hey, brother - um, miss?"  I suspect it was the handbag, plus the attitude.

 

@ShawnaLeigh, I am delighted for you!  It is such a great feeling and so affirming.  You will have many more momenst like this in the future!

[Astrid]

Three times now, in the last month, as I've been doing my Saturday morning walk with three other neighborhood women, strangers (walking their dogs or whatnot) have addressed the four of us as girls.  YES!! 

 

Astrid

[Kylie]

Isn't it the best feeling!?

 

I remember my first few outings as myself. I went to Wal Mart pouring sweat and nothing happened, no looks, no words, nothing..

 

As I have been living as myself for well over a year now, I still get a warm feeling of acceptance everytime someone says ma'am.  Haven't been misgendered in well over a year! I hope despite the woes at home, things continue to pick you up like those!

 

Kylie