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What's the strangest thing someone has said to you about being trans?


ThatDarnDodo

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Yesterday another one of our service techs approached me. She walked up with her phone in hand, then says “I wanted show you a picture of a cute guy I met but as soon as I saw you I remembered I’m a lesbian.”  

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A coworker asked me, "can I still talk to you about baseball?"  LOL!  I told him that hormones don't affect interest in or knowledge of sports.  ?

 

Carolyn Marie

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My closest friend asked if I would still like chainsaws.  Uh no, I gave up on them years ago, but we still talk about cars and woodworking.  

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  • 3 weeks later...

Just a update about this coworker I posted  exactly 1 month ago today about me “grabbing his crotch” on my way to the restroom . Well, he strikes again. He  asked me in the lunch room in front of 2 other coworkers when I’m going to cut my “disgusting fingernails “and continued ask me when I’m changing sexes and  when I’m going to grow “boobies”. I laughed it off then after lunch I confronted him in the shop and asked him “ what is your F ing problem with me lately “  And to  knock it off. He got really nervous and said he will keep his comments to himself. Then before I went home he told me “ don’t go home mad “ and he was only messing with me. 
I started documenting his comments because the next step is to go to HR. I have worked with this guy for over 10 years and want to give him a chance to stop by giving him  a verbal warning. I have a feeling this is not the last time I’m going to have a issue with him.

 

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1 hour ago, Michellle said:

Just a update about this coworker I posted  exactly 1 month ago today about me “grabbing his crotch” on my way to the restroom . Well, he strikes again. He  asked me in the lunch room in front of 2 other coworkers when I’m going to cut my “disgusting fingernails “and continued ask me when I’m changing sexes and  when I’m going to grow “boobies”. I laughed it off then after lunch I confronted him in the shop and asked him “ what is your F ing problem with me lately “  And to  knock it off. He got really nervous and said he will keep his comments to himself. Then before I went home he told me “ don’t go home mad “ and he was only messing with me. 
I started documenting his comments because the next step is to go to HR. I have worked with this guy for over 10 years and want to give him a chance to stop by giving him  a verbal warning. I have a feeling this is not the last time I’m going to have a issue with him.

 

I hope you can get it resolved with out hr getting involved. Being harassed like that has no place at work. It’s frustrating and saddening. I am having a similar issue with my boss he makes comments and harasses me about growing my hair out constantly. Telling me things that are too inappropriate to post. I considered going to hr but I don’t want to out myself at work.

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Seriously hon, that really sucks. Although in a way those comment are considered sexual harassment. I know the people I work with wouldn't want that on their record.

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2 hours ago, ElizabethStar said:

Seriously hon, that really sucks. Although in a way those comment are considered sexual harassment. I know the people I work with wouldn't want that on their record.

Thank you Elizabeth . I know you have going through similar situations at your job. I work in a auto shop and it’s a very competitive environment so it’s  easier for some people to voice their opinion especially when management is usually no where to be found . I know it’s harassment, but I want to give a chance to back off before I go to hr.  I’ll keep you posted if this situation escalates.

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I’m in a similar boat as you Michelle I work on heavy equipment. It gets frustrating because everyone has to top the next person. What really frustrates me with the field we’re in people seem so stuck in there ways and there not accepting of anyone that is not like them.

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2 hours ago, Emily michelle said:

I hope you can get it resolved with out hr getting involved. Being harassed like that has no place at work. It’s frustrating and saddening. I am having a similar issue with my boss he makes comments and harasses me about growing my hair out constantly. Telling me things that are too inappropriate to post. I considered going to hr but I don’t want to out myself at work.

Wow, your boss has a lot learn about how to treat his employees. Is your boss a drill sergeant? Lol .I don’t know about your state but New Jersey I am protected by law from being fired from expressing my gender. I don’t want to go to hr unless the situation gets out of control . I know my boss wants to avoid harassment issues at all costs.The first step is telling the harasser to stop and if they continue then you go to hr.

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He is a good guy but he doesn’t know when to shut his mouth. He is actually one of the easiest going bosses I have ever had that is why I hate to say anything right now. If we have a problem on site he will almost always sticks up for the mechanics. I try to avoid the shop so I don’t have to hear it as much. The laws in Missouri don’t really say much about being able to fire me. If I could get the union on my side when I come out at work I stand a good chance of not being fired. The other thing there is not people knocking down the door to work on heavy equipment especially when your in a service truck. Hopefully between those two things I won’t lose my job. Now the harassment from everyone else is a totally different story.

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When I came out to staff at work, my admin, bless her heart, said 'Ok I don't understand.... you just like to wear women's clothing?" I had a good laugh and just responded 'no, thats just a very small part of it'.

 

When I was first exploring what her feelings about transgenders were, (before I came out), she said 'oh, I'm fine with them as long as they're not douches'. Classic answer and often quoted with friends after that.

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13 hours ago, Emily michelle said:

He is a good guy but he doesn’t know when to shut his mouth. He is actually one of the easiest going bosses I have ever had that is why I hate to say anything right now. If we have a problem on site he will almost always sticks up for the mechanics. I try to avoid the shop so I don’t have to hear it as much. The laws in Missouri don’t really say much about being able to fire me. If I could get the union on my side when I come out at work I stand a good chance of not being fired. The other thing there is not people knocking down the door to work on heavy equipment especially when your in a service truck. Hopefully between those two things I won’t lose my job. Now the harassment from everyone else is a totally different story.

We do have similar jobs Emily, Unfortunately your never going to get rid of “shop banter” from the other guys but that’s different then outright harassment.Believe me I can take rib here and there about my looks but this coworker of mine needed to be put in his place. I am pretty valuable to my job also , its hard to find a good qualified auto technician. Good luck at work, if the comments get too much you have to start with a verbal warning. 

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Yes there is a big difference between joking around and harassment. I’m hoping I don’t get much harassment but I’m afraid I am by just listening to what other people say about others. It still seems to me the entire industry is more of a good old boys club. Especially since I usually work in mines and quarries. It would be different if it wasn’t so male dominated.

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  • 2 weeks later...

My employer sent out an official statement about changing my name and pronouns to the whole company today.  The owner called me and said  that he (our insurance) usually pays for the other girls to have babies but since that doesn't apply to me that he'll ( our insurance again) pay for me to have whatever surgeries I need.

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I always get a giggle about the menstrual cycle or "are you pregnant" questions.  I could only wish?  

A few other odd questions:

 "What's your relationship with the other woman"  Answer "my oldest dearest friend"  I guess that covers my wife of almost 50 years.

  "What gender are you?", a question asked by a handsome young Indian man as i left The local Hindu, Islamic Market.

Answer: "trans" with a response from him: "Do you want to hang out".  I simply nodded at my wife sitting in the car and sad: " Sorry i'm married."

  Needless to say this is an interesting life if i relax and enjoy it.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

  

 

 

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5 hours ago, Charlize said:

"What's your relationship with the other woman"  Answer "my oldest dearest friend"  I guess that covers my wife of almost 50 years.

Thats a beautiful response @Charlize.  My wife is my oldest and dearest friend too.  We've known each other for 50 years!

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  • 2 months later...

This happen about 14 years ago. I was always concern about me projecting my facial features as a female as possible. I was never convince until one day in the South I had a guy placed a shot gun in my face. This happen in a parking structure in a large shopping mall during the holidays.  I beat this guy to a parking place and parked. He jumped out from his truck and pointed a shot gun in my face and said " If you were f___king nig____er dud I'll blow your f____king  head off". He looked at me and I thought of my whole life ending and he said "don't you every do that sh___t again" and  he turned around and walked away. 

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Oh my gosh over a parking space people need to chill out. Well I’m glad to hear that you pass that well.

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