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Share a Hopeful Thought Every Day


Heather Shay

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I love Mark Twain - I wrote a play with him in it - and I llove his wisdom.

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"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion.

If you want to be happy, practice compassion."

     Dalai Lama

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I want all of you to know - I am your friend always.... Heather Shay.....

 

Comfort In Your Arms Quotes, Quotations & Sayings 2020

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@Abi you are kind but I have a lot of negative and down moments - 68 years is a goodly amount of time to have gone through enough wars internally and externally to know positivity in the face of adversity is always something to strive for. My motto/mantra - and I don't always live up to it - but I think about it in my darkest times is - GET BETTER NOT BITTER.

 

I'm currently up and positive - that means when I'm down I'm sure you will be up and you can help me - YOU AND I ARE IN THIS TOGETHER SISTER.

 

With Love,

 

Heather Shay

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How to achieve becoming BETTER and not BITTER

  1. Choose Joy. And I’m not talking about happiness. There’s a distinct difference between the two. Happiness is an outward expression while joy is an inward decision. Happiness is a reaction to what’s going on around us. Joy is a conscious choice that no matter what happens, you will rise above. Choosing joy will transform the way you live. It will allow you to see beyond your circumstance to what really matters.
  2. Grieve, But Get Back Up. Grief is a normal response to a tragic situation. It’s okay to cry, scream, and get angry. It’s okay to eat an entire pint of ice cream to drown away your sorrows. Grief is healthy. Be sad. Be upset. Be hurt. But don’t stay there. Walk through those feelings, but make sure you continue to walk. Giving up in the middle of grief can swallow you whole. When you’ve finished your ice cream, set the spoon down. Holding onto grief can paralyze your process. If you want things to get better, feel it and follow through.
  3. Pick Your Friends Wisely. Some friends serendipitously fall into our lives while others are hard-earned. Remember, you are who you surround yourself with. If Bitter Betty is your bestie, her bitterness will most definitely rub off on you. Be mindful of how your friends make you feel. If they bring you down, cut them off. The same goes for certain family members. If you have a sibling/parent/cousin/etc that can’t stop crying over the spilt milk, step away. Find relationships that speak life into your circumstance. Everyone needs Positive Polly as a friend.
  4. Keep The Faith. No matter your religion or beliefs, have faith. Faith that it is going to get easier. Faith that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Without belief in something, there can’t be a belief in anything. My faith in God rescued me from bitterness. He is my strength when I have none. He will make a way where there is no way. Have faith that where you are now is not where you will always be.
  5. Have Hope. Similar to faith, we must never lose hope. Hopelessness is a breeding ground for bitterness. Those who give up hope often fester in bitterness until the very end. When everything else fades away, hope will be your anchor. When catastrophe comes, hope will be the gentle salve that heals your wounds. Hope gives us a future perspective and allows us to grow through our trials.
  6. Be Intentional. Don’t drift. Complacency leads to dissatisfaction and resentment. Without intent we become victims. We fall prey to our tragedy. A victim mentality is a guarantee for bitterness. Every curveball has limitations, but living without intent allows our challenges to overpower every area. Maintain some level of normalcy and be intentional about how you spend your days. Sitting on the couch is a recipe for disaster during life’s battles. We rarely have the choice of what challenges we will face, but we do have the choice on how we will respond. Being intentional is a sure-fire way to take your power back.
  7. Find The Lesson. Though it may be the proverbial needle in a haystack, you can find lessons in your tragedy. I’m not referring to reason why the tragedy happened, but rather the wisdom you can glean from it. Every struggle can teach you something. My fight against cancer has completely changed my life. There are many disappointments that have resulted from my diagnosis, yet, because I’ve searched for the lessons, I’ve become a better person. I’ve learned more during my lowest points than I ever have in my highest.
  8. Count Your Blessings. It’s easy to focus on the negative in the middle of misfortune. Remember that life hasn’t always been and won’t always be difficult. We all have reasons to be thankful. Focusing on the positive things in your life will shield you against bitterness. Blessings block bitterness. It’s as simple as that.
  9. Get Healthy. Physically, emotionally, and spiritually. We all feel better when we feel better. When physically weak, get emotionally strong. When emotionally weak, go to the gym and grow those muscles! Pay attention to what you’re putting into your body. Eat what gives you life. Though few want to cook healthy meals and would rather opt for quicker and easier options when life gets hard, making healthier choices will pave the way towards a better life. Treat your body kindly, it’s the only one you get.
  10. Help Others. Your tragedy gives you insight into what others may be experiencing. Be what you needed when you were thrown a curveball for someone else. Serving others gives us an outward perspective and allows us to see life for more than what it may feel like in difficult seasons. There will always be someone else who has it worse. Reaching out and lending a helping hand betters not only you, but the one you’re serving.
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  • Posts

    • EasyE
      Don't think Americans would go for the "compulsory" part. We kind of like not being told what to do ... Amazingly, there is great pushback on voter ID laws. The opponents say it discourages voting, especially among the poor and minorities. That is really a smokescreen IMO for those who want to harvest ballots from as many places as possible, including folks who don't exist or don't hold citizenship... 
    • Betty K
      Pretty soon I think I might be ready to talk about gender-affirming care for kids, possibly w/r/t the Cass Review and its shortcomings.
    • KayC
      She was a beautiful young woman ...   "What we do know is that the offender was a very violent individual and should not have been on our streets.”  Whether gender related or not, the mental health and incarceration issues in our country are incredibly bad and need to be addressed.
    • Sally Stone
      April,   I'm glad my entries are interesting to you.  TransCentralPA is a great organization with so many caring people.  I would strongly recommend you find a way to attend the Keystone Conference.  I guarantee you'll find it an amazing experience.     Hugs,   Sally
    • KayC
    • KayC
      Dear @Sally Stone.  I think you should author a memoir based on these posts (maybe you're already working towards that?).  You could decide at a later time if/when you might want to publish.   I appreciate you sharing your deep connection with your friend Willa (and I am sorry for your loss) and the benefit of having a Trans friend and mentor in our Life and Journey.  I was fortunate to have found one also in our TGP friend @Kasumi63.   As you know we share many common Life themes in our stories.  Drop me a PM if you'd like to chat about it.  Looking forward to the next 'chapter'.
    • Mirrabooka
      Voting is compulsory here, for better or worse. Would doing the same in the US snap people out of their apathy?
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I am noting you use CRT terminology.  The comment is not out of the blue.  Some of your remarks on religion suggest atheism.  So it is believable that you are a Marxist, knowingly or not.  Are you?
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Congrats to your family on the new addition!
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Funny you think that I would be able to get through more than two sentences with how bad my stutter gets (joking, of course)   My topic would probably be mythology, random Japan factoids in my mind, or a favorite story   (Best option would be a fave story of mine including a lot of factoids on Japanese myths-)
    • Willow
      Congratulations @ivy. Nothing beats a family growing two feet at a time!
    • April Marie
      I read each of your entries and learn so much. Thank you, especially, for the TransCentralPA info. I have been looking fora group and activities where I could express myself safely and with support. I missed this year's conference but next year might be possible and I am going to look at their other events, too.
    • April Marie
      Leadership and Management, the differences and similarities between the two as well as the applications of military leadership principles across the spectrum of professions.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I have read numerous accounts of trans folk no longer being welcome among evangelicals.   I am here for help and fellowship not to rebuke anyone.  I can take a pretty high degree of insult, etc., and you haven't insulted me, to my recollection anyway :) and I usually let it go.  But I thought I would let it all out there.   I am sure I disagree with you on numerous issues.  I appreciate other people's viewpoints, including those who radically disagree with me.  Intellectual challenge is good. One thing I appreciate about @MaeBe.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Congrats!
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