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Greetings, I'm mostly on the discord server but I figured I would finally introduce myself here as well.


Heather A

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Greetings a little bit about me, I'm heather from Minnesota. I have been 26 years old for over a decade sorry I actually stopped keeping track over a decade ago, and I haven't gotten tired of telling people that in all that time.  I apparently was able to go through decades of my adult life and burred any transgender feelings until January of this year when I came out to my wife.  I'm sure like many people here in my earlier years I just decided to go with the flow of everyone else and try to bury any feelings I had, when that didn't work in high School I made the decision to join the military and figured they would get ride of any feelings, finally when that didn't work I tried getting married for the last 10+ years to finally put those feelings to rest.  As you can guess none of those ideas worked I'm sure I'm not the only one to try some of these approaches nor will I be the last.  That's at least the short version of how I got to identifying I was trans

 

Since coming out to my wife and January, I did start seeing a Therapist in February, after a number of sessions with my Therapist who has been great by the way, I was hit by literal lightning and started to connect all the dots, I think I actually stopped talking for a few minutes in therapy when I realized my entire life I had been fighting my Transgender feelings.  Now I can't un-see it and how I missed all of the signs over the years but since I can't change the past I can only try to make the best over the future I have and move forward.  I was also lucky enough to start HRT April of this year despite all of the restrictions COVID created for everyone.  Also I did finally come out to family and Friends just last month and so far everyone was accepting of who I want to be.  It was actually a nice feeling to finally come out to all of my Family and Friends that I communicate with on a regular basis.  

 

I have been on the Discord sever for several months now but I figured I would check back with the Forum sight and just say Hello.  I'm sure I'm missing something but I just figured I would drop a quick introduction.

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2 hours ago, Heather A said:

As you can guess none of those ideas worked I'm sure I'm not the only one to try some of these approaches nor will I be the last.

Hello Heather, No you are not the first one to use the “suppress, deny, compartmentalize” method of dealing with a gender issue. I used it unsuccessfully for years so don’t feel bad. Therapy has helped but I wish, like you, I could’ve had that Ah Ha!! moment years earlier to save me all the time and pain.

 

I’m excited for you. You have climbed out of the box and see the world as yourself. In time you’ll live like you’ve never lived before. It’s a wonderful experience and treasure every minute...even the difficult parts will be helpful later on into your transition. Having your wife behind your efforts makes it all the better. 

 

I hope to read more about your journey as it develops.

 

Warmest Regards,

Susan R?

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Hi Heather,

Welcome to TransPulse. You are not alone in burying your thoughts and feelings. I had my Ah Ha moment early this year as well at about 65 years old. I felt almost like I had been struck by lightning same as you and started connecting the dots myself. I am glad your wife is supportive along with your family and friends. I had thoughts that didn’t make any sense since I was about 5 years old. What I heard transgender meant didn't seem to fit me. Then I realized transgender didn’t mean what I had heard and realized I am one!

 

I am also out to everyone I really care about. My wife struggled a little bit, but now she is onboard. It was a nonevent to my daughters. Everyone is different. Be sure to keep the communication lines open with your wife. It can make all the difference. Hope to see you around.

 

Hugs, Mike

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Hi, Heather.  Congratulations on figuring it out and starting your transition!  I, too, compartmentalized and denied who I was, tried the military, got married, and still ended up admitting the inevitable at age 61.  It is a common path for many of us, so you are in good company.  At least you figured it out early, at 26(-ish ? )!

 

Regards,

Kathy

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