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    • ShawnaLeigh
      Thank you.  I know in time it will get better and I’m normally a very positive person.   I just need to formulate my planB and find some security for my future.  Luckily I have a couple plans to help lower my bill load and allow me to afford to move out eventually.  
    • Krisvm
      I think that may be the same one I am trying to get in contact with!     I know that and that is why I have tried to be patient but now it has been over a month and nothing I am getting a little concerned.
    • Krisvm
      I would say in the longer term try to be patient with yourself. One thing I have struggled with is that I want to keep moving faster and faster but some things do take a long time to work through. Also try to take care of yourself afterwards. Therapy may not seem like it but often you are doing a lot of mental work so a bit of selfcare after can do you the world of good.
    • tracy_j
      I get where you are coming from on this Samantha as my best description is 'I am not a man'. I sometimes think it strange with myself as I have a male body I don't despise, just think it could be better. It works which is the main thing for me.  I agree with Mary in that I am me (Ok a slight twist on her meaning maybe). I am who I am and mentally far more attuned to the set of women than that of men. I did not really ever adapt to male culture either and never understood the 'us and them' thing. I still question myself, but if there has to be a divide I am female. It's not really down to clothes or looks. It is who I am deep inside.   Tracy
    • DeeDee
      I can only echo what others have said Laura - any therapist can only reflect on the information you give them, so be brutally blunt about your feelings and why you are there, and don't expect too much after your first session 🤗 I talked for over 2 hours and the only comment I got was an assurance that this was not a mental health issue and that they would support me as best as they could. I had to stop myself from hugging her as I left lol.
    • Susan R
      Great question and it seemed a deceptively easy one at first until you really think about it in depth.   Speaking only for myself, I believe it has more to do with what I think of myself and what role I have always desired within my circle family, friends, acquaintances and community.   When I was four, I had no interest in being like my dad or younger brother.  I liked what my mom did...being the caregiver and glue within our family.  I desired to be like her whether it was in the kitchen, shopping at the store, taking us places, etc... I also wanted to be like my two older sisters.  They were always doing things I enjoyed and when I was eventually included in their "dressing up" activities, it was then I felt like one of the girls.  I felt like myself as others have stated.  It never changed throughout my entire life.  I pretended it did but I always felt fake when presenting as male.  Now I'm living day to day in my natural role as a women along with presenting as one as well.  I'm known by my family, friends, acquaintances and community as Susan which is how it should have been all along.   Just my 2¢, Susan R🌷
    • tracy_j
      It will get easier in time Shawna. I find in times of stress that keeping very busy helps. I am out like a light.   Tracy
    • tracy_j
      It's interesting you say that DeeDee. I remember a year or two back when in my work clothes (so male) buying some more sporty womens leggings from Topshop and asking the assistant about sizing. She said that quite a few men bought them. It seems to work both ways.   Tracy
    • ShawnaLeigh
      340am.  Can’t seem to get a full nights sleep since coming out to some of my family and my wife.  Still have deeper stress and anxiety about it.  So tired all the time now.   might as well get up and do my work out and get the day rolling.  Coffee soon! i hope everyone has a good day.  
    • DeeDee
      No worries Anna, you are going to need that brolly now we are into winter! I have not been keeping well recently, but am starting to feel better so I intend to start going back out again next week - I have actually missed my morning jogs, and mens running tights are just socially acceptable leggings so it feels nice wearing them out in public too. 😉
    • DeeDee
      I agree with Mary, this is a really good question Samantha. Once you take sex organs out of the equation, because a mastectomy or hysterectomy do not stop a woman being a woman, all you are left with is the gender stereotypes in society (women like shopping, men like fixing cars) which we also know don't mean anything really or we wouldn't be here, and your personal feelings about where you feel most comfortable. But it is definitely a "what does it mean to you?" 😊
    • Josie Beth
      I never understood the stark contrast between the two grandmothers that I’ve had in my life because both of them lived through the Great Depression. The unapologetic one was like many I’ve heard of in that she was afraid of doing without. So afraid that it became entirely selfish. And of course she passed this on to my father who was the favorite and ended up playing favorites, preferring my brother to me. I was the one who was constantly blamed for things my brother did, or for things other school children did.   A couple of examples. My brother locked me out of a building one day when I was about to pee my pants and laughed at me from the other side. I tried to get my mother’s attention by knocking but she was vacuuming so she didn’t hear. I knocked harder and in my panic broke the window. I felt bad enough about it and still peed my pants but I was blamed for everything. When I pointed out that it wouldn’t have happened if my brother had not locked me out, my bank account was drained to pay for the window while my brother wasn’t punished at all. I only had $30 in it but that forced me to close the account while my brother was accruing interest and kept rubbing it in.   Another example was when I was given a basketball in school by another student who scratched their name off and wrote mine on it. I brought it home and happily showed it off to my parents. Instead of them being happy for me they called around and decided that I had stolen it which resulted in a severe beating and the confiscation of the ball. I also got in trouble with the school and still didn’t understand why. I found out later that this “friend” set me up and the ball actually belonged to the school. I didn’t know about how to tell if it was a school ball, I was just a happy kid. But these injustices are still with me and when I confronted my dad about them he didn’t apologize either, he just waved it off dismissively and said he had forgotten all about it. The point was that I hadn’t forgotten about it and I wanted an apology. So when I encounter attitudes like this in people or management practices I just can’t abide by them. Nobody has the right to mistreat someone and then just cling to their arrogance about it.    My maternal grandmother was also in the Great Depression but her memories of that time were far different. She didn’t fear doing without. Her memories were not about being hungry but encounters with comical people who lived nearby. Her whole demeanor was completely different. It was one of benevolence and sharing her love of life. She was not attached to money in a way that harmed others. She spared no expense to show us kids all kinds of wonderful experiences. It was about family not greed. Her attitude was one of plenty instead of despair. I really think this had a lot to do with how much richer her life was and it was always more fun on that side of the family. I actually look up to her and my aunts a lot more than anybody else. Their energy is so much better. 
    • Dannie
      Congrats I love going to my therapist she is my rock Just be truthful and you will figure out what is right for you
    • Dannie
      To me it feels right my wife ask me why I CD? This is before I got married. And I thought about it and the answer is I feel right. This is me the hair the dress the makeup the shoes and of course the breast forms. It’s like I walk around in a black and white movie, and when I dress it’s all color. Like the Wizard of Oz and I’m  Julie Garland off to see the wizard. To get my HRT because I can’t go back to that dark place again 
    • Aidan5
      That comment made me laugh, and it made my day.
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