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I am ambidextrous. I learned to write righty in school so I usually write with my right hand but my handwriting is better if I use my left hand. I use a lefty mouse. I am physically stronger in my left side.

Easy, I have felt the same way, not quite to the point of wanting to quit but sitting there one dosing morning and thinking "what am I doing?". I am in a crazy place right now; family is moving across the country, I am being laid off for the first time in my career and have to find a new job, and I'm in the middle of this gender journey that seems like it makes everything harder than it could be. I'd always been a "man with boobs", even when I was in my 20s and really skinny I had breast tissue, and now I'm accepting of that and want more but in a different way--I don't want to be a man with boobs, I want something different. I am something different, but it's hard because of nearly a half-century of social programing. So I empathize with your struggle, very directly. I haven't dressed "male" for nearly six months and I just volunteered at a conference with my femme nickname and she/her pronouns on my name lanyard. The whole experience was great, I didn't feel a minute of anxiety or worry. That stuff comes at home, when left to my thoughts. Which is more telling? The comfort being Mae in public or the doubts and worry in private? When I look in the mirror and see this more feminine me, it calms down the doubts and worry, so I'm starting to allow myself to trust in the former.

Totally! I started HRT 21 months ago. I'm 53yo now. I mostly did not want the feminine genes of my family to take me over. I told my doctor I wanted athletic breasts. She has kept me on fairly low doses and I'm avoiding progesterone so far. It's mostly mental for me. Taking the pressure off from not having erections is soothing and changes my thinking. I just want that stuff gone. I had fun with it, but I'm over it. I'm extremely happy with what has happened with my breasts. Perhaps it took more than a year, but they have a feminine, athletic appearance now. I don't notice changes in the rest of my body. I've always enjoyed being thin and straight and have no desire for curves. I can dig that butch with a feminine touch look. I was upset at cutting my hair, but I'm liking it now. It's fun to see all these young transwomen in my environment. Everyone has their own style and the younger generation has a style of their own compared to us older people. OK, back to baking a pie and doing some knitting....

Quite the pairings!

I have one daughter who is left handed. But she is fairly ambidextrous. Apparently you have to be.

The time I spent "on the street" was mostly in the woods. I dislike cities. Even now my "bathroom" is out in the back yard, and has been for years. When you're used to it, it's not so bad. Helps one keep up with the seasons. I have no desire to live on the street in a city. Most of my adult kids live in cities. It's nice enough for a visit, but I still prefer the country.

ambidextrous in all areas haha

It's amazing how we can use either hand to write with, not too many people can do that.

Y'all be holding pencils like left handed people but I just hold my pens/pencils in ways that make people go "what the actual [squid]"

Hi Ivy, I can relate to that holding my pencil in my left hand although I'm right-handed.

So I am two months into E therapy as of this week. What can I say? I am now a busty blond supermodel who doesn't look a day over 25. This stuff is amazing! OK, so I exaggerate, lol ... Seriously, the effects have been subtle so far. I would say very slight "plumping" in the chest region. More pronounced feelings at times (especially anger, which I don't necessarily like). The downstairs feels ... different... I can tell something is going on to affect that region. Things come and go. I do feel overall ... different. Still dealing with fatigue though not as much as last week... Back story: I had treatment for head and neck cancer 20 years ago. One surgery removed a tumor in my lymph nodes. They took out a whole bunch of stuff from my neck that was anywhere close to the tumor, including part of my shoulder muscle on the left side. Since then, my shoulders are lopsided and things (i.e. my chest) tend to sag on that side. I have long joked that I had a "uni-boob". Well, maybe the other side is going to catch up a little? Right now, I wouldn't pass for female upstairs except for the uni-boob (and the fact that I keep everything shaved). I nearly quit HRT last week. I have been pretty discouraged overall with my life, career, relationships, direction. I feel pretty rudderless at times, and nothing seems to be going anywhere. For a day, I just felt like HRT was going to add to the misery: who is going to want a "man with boobs" (I still really crave the affections of a female, which is why a lot of this is very confusing). But those feelings seemed to have passed or at least are on simmer... For now I will keep going. I just don't think I can ever give up wanting to dress female or desiring to have a more feminine body shape. Where that leads, who the heck knows... What a strange life this is turning out to be ...

I've been feeling for decades about how completely awful the bathroom situation is in America. We have these portable restrooms all over the place in the cities with people coming to empty them but there is a sewer right underneath them. When I lived on the streets, at night if I had to go, I often walked 12 blocks to a portable restroom only to find that it is locked and then I would scour the city for a 20oz coke bottle to pee in. It was sad when society had to fight stupid people making restrooms in parks unsafe. It seems like things were better in the 70's.

Totally. Coffee is too expensive this morning, but last month I hunted down some nice ginger and had that stored well in the meat drawer of my fridge that I don't use for meat. Made a nice pot of ginger tea and played piano while it was boiling. D-7 Bbmaj7 G-7 Bbmaj7 A7#9 repeat the cycle Cmaj Emin Amin G F C/E (or is it E-?) D (lydian!) G Fun stuff. The Navy had me playing Jamiroquai's High Times on bass around South America. Fun bass line on a 5 string bass! I played it for the first time in 25 years the other day. Sure was fun! Not too into the lyrics. Jay Kay is wonderfully melodic though. Put on Allentown, sitting at my computer. Someone has to do this work. I can't really afford it, but I need a battery for my watch with hands. I'm likely going to ride the bus there because I'm working on healing my feet. I hate the bus, but this guy at that store can replace the battery in 20 seconds. I'm lost without my watch. My stupid clock in the kitchen went on "power saver" mode and the clock goes to sleep. Not a good way to cook. I use my watch for all kinds of things though. I've got my old men's Timex on the ear of the stained glass owl in the entry. It has a dead bat too.

"In the midst of winter, I found there was within me an invincible summer." -Albert Camus "Let nothing disturb you, nothing frighten you, all things are passing, God is unchanging. Patience gains all; nothing is lacking to those who have God: God alone suffices." -St. Teresa of Avila

Happy Monday! The cycle of it all....

I wonder about this sometimes. If it were so, they would be in their 50's by now. It's not impossible. Guess I'm a girl with a past.

Just a casserole with macaroni and leftover hamburger. It will last me a couple of days or more. I frequently use my wok, but in the kitchen.

I must be missing something here. Coins and pentangles do interchange. And Bird is the word. But all I know about coders is the socks.

Funny thing. When I went to school I was writing with my right hand (I'm right handed) but holding the pencil like a left handed person. They made me change that, and to be sure it was better for me. Of course my handwriting is still barely legible. It's just a curious thing. I'm a kinda mixed up person.

Bathroom usage law based on chromosomes is quite irrational. Just within the intersex community there are quite a few problems with it with those that have full or partial androgen insensitivity. For instance, I have XY chromosomes but also have a uterus and fallopian tubes. My breasts are real and I have had them since puberty. I was also born without a penis to speak of, but I do have testes. I don't look like the average guy, and much less now that I don't hide my DDD's behind baggy layered clothes. Physically I am much more female than male, but my birth certificate and chromosomes say something else. I most definitely don't fit in the men's room. Last time I tried everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at me until I left. I have used the family restroom in public ever since (all gender). The Texas law basically leaves only one choice for intersex individuals. Family restroom or pee your pants. 🙄

Morning on this rainy dreary day. light rain and 40. yeppy. One of those days I just want to climb back in bed for the rest of the day. unfortunately, have to go to work. HI Ho HI ho, its off to work I owe. Kymmie

I had a similar experience. My father, doing geneological research, googled the name of the tiny hamlet in Scotland where his family came from. He was surprised to find a request from someone in Australia wanting to find his birth mother. The mother was named as my father's sister, from that same tiny hamlet. There was no possibility of mistaken identity: there could not be two people of that name in such a small place. The family knew that my aunt had had a child out of wedlock, but no one had kept track of the child. And of course, the times being what they were, knowledge of the event was kept on a need-to-know basis. My father contacted the person in Australia. He gained a nephew and I gained a cousin that I never knew I had. We kept in touch until my cousin passed away a few years ago. I am still in occasional contact with his widow.

I can relate to that, I started my oral estrogen back in 2017.. less than 6 months I was wearing jeans size 40, then afterward my hips started to curve so I can fit a jeans size 12 or 14.. my treating doctors suggested for me to take before and after pictures and show it to them during my next doctor's appointment.

I have several. Knowledge isn’t the ability to memorize or retain. It’s the ability to research, mankind will be as smart as the books it keeps.” -Albert Einstein “Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.” ~Einstein "It is easier to denature plutonium than to denature the evil spirit of man." -Albert Einstein You're not studying to be an #EMT, you're studying to save someone's Life. #Read #Practice #Prepare - Jerry Bates (Navy Corpsman ret.) He returned from Vietnam committed to teaching EMS and making a difference in rural communities. I’m proud to know him as a friend.

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