Hi ^^

[Guest kunoichigoddess]

ok from what i understand i shouldnt use my real name or planned name on these forums so i wont

my username is kunoichigoddess im 17 right now and i'm a girl with a guys body, i first realized this when i was eight

when i realized i always prayed to god every night til i was 16 to please turn me into a girl and eventually i realized that

wasnt going to happen so i asked for somebody who could help me instead and later that year i met my best freind on

final fantasy XI just cause i wasnt born with a girls body doesnt mean a cant be a tom boy now and then =P in talking with

her she helped me to realize that i am a girl even though not physically, still not enough for me but it's a start ^^ so im

looking forward to my 18 birthday only one month away and then im gonna go to a pflag to try and find out about getting

started on hormones so i can finally become a woman on the outside too.

last year i told my parents because my freind told me it would be a good idea, and i did knowing that my parents might not

like the announcement, one thing that the experiance has taught me of praying every night but not getting it hope for the best but expect the worst, the worst is just about what happened I ended up coming out to my mom when shaving my legs

suddenly lost that kinda entertainment it use to get and she comforted me for the night and took me to the psychologist again when they psychologist heard he took me off autism medication. which has been great i hate pills the only ones i think ill ever be ok with taking are the hormones and even then ill have problems. as for my mom ever since i told her she's been giving me all the heavy lifting chores and only brings it up when whenever she feels like making jokes about it and after that she tells me all the downsides to being a girl as though its some horrible curse to be a woman... my dad on the other hand i told him the next day after he told me that his Xgirlfreind got breast implants just for herself to make her feel better, which lulled me into a false sense of security and i told him, he flipped out and he's finally calmed down but he's still trying to make me change my mind

due to my experiences ive finally been able to choose a career as of this year, im going to be a psychologist for other people that are tg, cause after going through it myself it's really just too hard to go it alone, if I didnt meet my freind

on ffxi i prolly wouldve killed myself already, i still get like that sometimes but i cant do it because i dont wanna hurt my mom and dad even though theyve been so mean lately i still love them, and i dont wanna hurt any of my freinds either, i dont wanna get put in jail or anything for saying that so just in advance no im not suicidal right now lol even if I was im too much of a coward to do it

[MaryEllen]

Hello kunoichigoddess,

Welcome to Laura's Playground forums. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us. Even though your parents were less than enthusiastic about your revelation, don't give up. Enjoy being who and what you are. It's your life and you can't live it according to what someone else thinks you should be.. Good luck.

MaryEllen