Don't Out Yourself

[swallow]

Well I think its very brave of you.?

 

I'm so fearful.

 

Part of it is I think I will 'unleash' forces I can't control maybe.

 

I think I'm the same person but I wonder if others whilst making mental adjustment for my appearance will have a higher bar to climb with the voice and their interaction with me will be different.?

 

Its entirely psychological.

 

I can entirely do a female voice in deep private. I sometimes have fun saying stupid things (very X rated) like "well you have a rather large corck sir"...and bc it should be in my mind a female voice in that context...I totally nail it.?

 

Of course I am not employed in a profession (as yet) that will ordinarily allow me to use that as an 'entry' into a conversation so I'll have to find another way to ease myself into a comfort zone for the more female voice.?

 

I like that you are employed in the 'Bra section' (somehow when I get turned around in a department store, I seem to invariably have wandered into this section).?

 

Maybe as you said having to have no choice but to use the female voice is a good push factor.

 

I think my main hurdle are my kids. I've come out to them so (hopefully) they are supportive of me making some effort to at least match voice to appearance. I'm taking a car trip with them shortly and hope to converse with them on the topic.

 

If they can make room to accommodate me on this issue, I feel more empowered. Fingers cross.

 

Then I don't have to voluntarily out myself so much anymore after all the 'effort' with appearance?

[Red_Lauren.]

On 7/4/2021 at 11:11 AM, swallow said:

Well I think its very brave of you.?

 

I'm so fearful.

 

Part of it is I think I will 'unleash' forces I can't control maybe.

 

I think I'm the same person but I wonder if others whilst making mental adjustment for my appearance will have a higher bar to climb with the voice and their interaction with me will be different.?

 

Its entirely psychological.

 

I can entirely do a female voice in deep private. I sometimes have fun saying stupid things (very X rated) like "well you have a rather large corck sir"...and bc it should be in my mind a female voice in that context...I totally nail it.?

 

Of course I am not employed in a profession (as yet) that will ordinarily allow me to use that as an 'entry' into a conversation so I'll have to find another way to ease myself into a comfort zone for the more female voice.?

 

I like that you are employed in the 'Bra section' (somehow when I get turned around in a department store, I seem to invariably have wandered into this section).?

 

Maybe as you said having to have no choice but to use the female voice is a good push factor.

 

I think my main hurdle are my kids. I've come out to them so (hopefully) they are supportive of me making some effort to at least match voice to appearance. I'm taking a car trip with them shortly and hope to converse with them on the topic.

 

If they can make room to accommodate me on this issue, I feel more empowered. Fingers cross.

 

Then I don't have to voluntarily out myself so much anymore after all the 'effort' with appearance?

The fear in general dose fade. The more you spend as the real you. The easier it gets. Even when I was just a cd. I spent a lot of time out and about, so by the time I was full time this spring. It was just another day. Its not to the point. Where when I have to be my old self. I dont fell comfortable in public. 

 

As for the bras. I work at lane bryant. We sell more bras compared to any thing else, so I'm not really in the bra department per say. 

 

Children can be great, or a pain in the butt. Especially younger ones. I'm 6ft tall and built like a former linebacker, so I scared kids even before because of my size. I'm slimer now, but still have a long way to go. The problem with kids. Is they only know gender from a appearance, and voice. The funny thing is little girls clock me more then boys, and their parents. I mean they see some one that looks like their mom, but sounds like their dad, so they generally call me man. 

[swallow]

I feel like adults do that too.?

 

Male voice is male voice.

 

Busted.?

 

Visually I know a number of cis-females that are ambiguous looking and can be mistaken for other sex.?

 

I was just invited to a 4th of July party of my daughter's friend's mom.

 

I dressed in a gray feminine cut no collar overall with a long flowing belt bling around the neck, Mary Janes.

 

I resolved maybe the speak in a slightly more neutral voice. Most of the ladies there were much older (so prob less judgemental, chastened by aging)?

 

well they got me going or I got myself going...chatting away and soon forgot the plan....fortunately I guess the conversation was interesting enough and my odd appearance perhaps no linger mattered. Was there from 12 to 5pm...my how time flies.?

[Red_Lauren.]

1 hour ago, swallow said:

I feel like adults do that too.?

 

Male voice is male voice.

 

Busted.?

 

Visually I know a number of cis-females that are ambiguous looking and can be mistaken for other sex.?

 

I was just invited to a 4th of July party of my daughter's friend's mom.

 

I dressed in a gray feminine cut no collar overall with a long flowing belt bling around the neck, Mary Janes.

 

I resolved maybe the speak in a slightly more neutral voice. Most of the ladies there were much older (so prob less judgemental, chastened by aging)?

 

well they got me going or I got myself going...chatting away and soon forgot the plan....fortunately I guess the conversation was interesting enough and my odd appearance perhaps no linger mattered. Was there from 12 to 5pm...my how time flies.?

I honestly work with a young lady. That is she wasn't so petite. That I think if she put on male clothes, got her male glasses, and tied back her hair. You would think she was a man. I also work with a lady. Who had a Jennifer tilly voice. When I heard her speak. My confidence in my female voice went through the roof. 

 

You are also right about adults and visal cues. I have longer hair, and have kept clean shaven for years. I can't tell you how many times I got called ma'am. Just from a visual standpoint. I can't recall the last time I was called sir in public.