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How Are You, This Very Instant?


Guest OneOutOfnOne

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I am awake after sleeping through both of my alarms, I slept in my recliner again while waiting for a call on Skype (which I also slept through).

There is a chill in the air but as my house plants expired during the summer I do not plan on turning my heat on just yet, I am at war with my electric company and don't want to pay them any more than is absolutely necessary.

I am feeling pretty good but my life is so full of uncertainty and I do not like 'flying blind', my new boss is so scatter brained that I never really know what my schedule is and she always misses the requests for certain times off - tonight I am playing a long dance job, she has known about it for several weeks and yet I was scheduled until 9:30 tonight - I made arrangements to cover those hours and she was fine with it but I asked her if I needed to come in at all and she said that she would check - it is Saturday morning and I am waiting for her to arrive at work so I can get the answer - I hate not knowing!

So after the long ramble I can say that I am a bit frustrated this morning.

I think that I'll have some hot cocoa and then think of Donna Jean in her three hour electrolysis session - yikes!

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest OneOutOfnOne

I knew I made this topic for a reason.

For the unacquainted, I am Lydia, and my presence here seems to be fickle as the weather.

I'm lying in my old bed at my father's house. I am visiting him for the holidays. It is rather late, but I usually stay up late talking to this girl from a town two time zones to my West. She and I like each other a lot.

I'm doing okay. My nerves are settled a bit, thanks in part to a couple muffins I had earlier. It was a difficult evening, coming out to the first of my parents/step-parents. Now just three more to go.

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Guest Joanna Phipps

4 am here in New Mexico, im sitting at my laptop wondering... down, depressed(again/still), lonely with no friends anywhere around me and a relationship with my wife that seems to be as solid as the desert sands

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Guest Miss Aeryn

crying reading this:

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate:

I am the captain of my soul.

Henley, Invictus

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I am amazingly fine - I have only one reason to be fine and hundreds of others to be miserable, I have developed a problem that I am hoping is a food allergy and not HRT related but I do have an appointment with my Endo today - I also have one with my therapist where I will no doubt discuss the options for me should I have to discontinue HRT!

So how can I be fine, I have someone who loves me and I love her so I am not alone anymore and that makes everything else fine.

While alone the world is too much to deal with but once you have opened your heart and share it with another it is so much easier.

Still in a good place no matter what.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest Donna Jean

Incredible mood!

Another old band mate of mine (since 1965) has been made aware of me and my transition!

We haven't talked yet, but he will be calling me this week. We'll be talking old times and of course my current status!

I'm very excited about that. My heart is pounding!

And I have some wonderful girlfriends that I love and they love me back......

AHhhhh........ Life is good!

HUGGS!

'

Donna Jean

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I am in an apprehensive mood. Got some medi tests in the new year , if I am ok ,cool.

I am in an impatient mood. Dont get to see my endo till next May but if Im ok re the

aforementioned medi I guess ""perspective"" will rule the day. I am lonely, I swear ,

this will be my last lonely Christmas . This time next year get ready World, Viv is on

the way and has some catching up to do . I am grateful, I am merely human so I dont

know how or why Laura"s **works** , but it does. My friends here dwarf me, their

love and compassion seemingly has no limits. Thank you re your post, luv,viv :)

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