Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

I Just Don't Get It


Guest Amy Androgynous

Recommended Posts

Guest Amy Androgynous

hi all amy here xxx

i was in hospital at the begining of september (the reason is not important) and as you may have guessed my hair (at the time) was shoulder length, i had a line in my neck and it was always catching in my hair... my mum brought a hair bobble / hair tie / makes a ponytail, and she said "i know it's a bit sissy but it'll help with the thing in your neck"

I was more than happy to wear a pink bobble in my hair and all...

when i got out of hospital mum got a text and was driving, she told me to read it and i did and it was about a sick joke about sex and a child in a dress. mum took the phone off me and just did a quiet laugh as if to say "woopsie, not for you"

following a few other previous experiences i haven't a clue about my mum's acceptance now!!

Link to comment
Guest Jess_W

ah wow, so the uh joke, ti wasn't mean right, it was just a joke, if she keeps infering she's okay with what you do, especially in such a short time, take it up with her, it seems she's trying to get you to talk to her about it?

arey ou out with her? like does she know (at least know buy the point you told her)

Link to comment
  • Admin

I wouldn't read too much into it, Amy. It sounds innocent enough.

I think the pink hair bobble sounds cute, though! I'll bet you enjoyed that. :)

I wish I had hair long enough for one. :(

Carolyn Marie

Link to comment
Guest Amy Androgynous
I wouldn't read too much into it, Amy. It sounds innocent enough.

I think the pink hair bobble sounds cute, though! I'll bet you enjoyed that. :)

I wish I had hair long enough for one. :(

Carolyn Marie

thank you, i do think i look into a bit much however it was iratating to be shown both pro CD and con CD by the same person :/ and it's funny that i loved having my hair in a bobble but i didn't get the chance to actually enjoy it, it was like i put it in and i was scared about the "that boy has a pink bobble" idea =[

love amy

Link to comment
Guest ChloëC

Hi, Amy,

I'm not going to disagree with any of the suggestions here, but perhaps offer just a slightly different take. Maybe she is trying to start a discussion, or maybe trying to understand your commitment to what you want. Possibly (like many others) she may be a little confused about what being tg actually means and what all the differences are.

I enjoy getting dressed, but I think I would have an extremely difficult time doing so in front of someone I wasn't sure understood enough about who and what I am - and was fully and totally accepting of me. If someone wasn't fully, yet seemed supportive, and offered me some feminine article, I'm not really sure how I personally would take it. Except to maybe ask why.

I do know that when I take the time to dress fully, I really don't think I want to be seen as a male, dressing as female. But someone not fully understanding the differences between tv, cd, MTF, drag, etc. could easily confuse all of them. And that person, in a naive but well meaning attempt to be supportive, actually may step on some toes.

And that's a hard part for all of us to deal with, I think. Knowing when someone is being supportive but confused. As opposed to someone being a little upset. Responding with anger or disappointment often won't go far in making it a better situation. Asking questions, remaining calm, responding positively - all can help. Time and understanding, it really has to go both ways.

I hope it works out.

Chloë

ps. I agree! If someone gave me an attractive article, I would definitely want to see how I looked in/with it, yet, I certainly couldn't do it not dressed. That would send absolutely confusing signals about me.

Link to comment
Guest Joanna Phipps
thank you, i do think i look into a bit much however it was iratating to be shown both pro CD and con CD by the same person :/ and it's funny that i loved having my hair in a bobble but i didn't get the chance to actually enjoy it, it was like i put it in and i was scared about the "that boy has a pink bobble" idea =[

love amy

Amy, while a person (SO/Spouse etc) is getting used to the idea they will have that kind of conflict. It is normal and natural; my advice would be to give the issue some time and let your mum come to her own terms with it. Trying to push her into your corner can have exactly the opposite results; there is no telling just how long it will take either.

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean

Amy, Sweetheart....

I agree with Joanna here on this......

You don't want to get the opposite effect that you desire....

Telling ANYONE about yourself can have results from immediate to a long time to digest it all....

Pushing someone to see your side can cause them to become defensive and lock you out!

Give your mom time....let her digest it all....don't push your side, you've given her the information....let it seep in!

Love

Donna Jean

Link to comment
Guest Joanna Phipps

Case in point Dee Jay, it has taken my wife since june to come to sufficient acceptance that we will be staying together. If I had pushed her she may well have filed the divorce papers

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   4 Members, 0 Anonymous, 99 Guests (See full list)

    • Vidanjali
    • VickySGV
    • awkward-yet-sweet
    • Ashley0616
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.7k
    • Total Posts
      768.6k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,031
    • Most Online
      8,356

    jacobb
    Newest Member
    jacobb
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Adele Svetova
      Adele Svetova
      (25 years old)
    2. BROOKSGLASS
      BROOKSGLASS
      (34 years old)
    3. FinnyFinsterHH
      FinnyFinsterHH
      (16 years old)
    4. fool4luv
      fool4luv
      (26 years old)
    5. itsaddison
      itsaddison
      (20 years old)
  • Posts

    • Abigail Genevieve
      They are thinking of Loudon.  The problem there was the girls were not protected from a known predator, who was moved from one school to another instead being effectively disciplined.  Outlaw school administrators? <sarc>
    • Abigail Genevieve
      How ironic.  I agree with the governor "“You cannot change your gender; you cannot pick your gender…there is a confused group of people that somehow think you can,”    - we are what we are, we are fighting the fact we CANNOT change our gender, which we did not pick.  Many if not all of us would not have picked a trans condition and have sought to evade, deny or move out or resolve it anyway we can.  Those who are confused on this issue are not trans folk.  They want us to change our gender but they deny we can.  Confusion.  
    • Vidanjali
      @FinnyFinsterHH no one can satisfy your questions about what will the future hold. But I can advise you to slow your mind down as much as you're able. Take it slow and one moment at a time. This advice goes beyond the practical reality that that's truly all you can do - further, try to enjoy each moment. It's clear you have a lot of aspirations regarding transition. But it's best to try to accept the bounds of your life circumstances at present because if you develop worries or even resentments about them, that will only make you bitter and more anxious. Instead, try to focus on anything you find affirming. Practice positive self-talk and give yourself affirmations too. Try to let go of expectations of your family members - they can only deal with change to the capacity they're able due to their own life conditions. Allow them grace as you wish they would allow you. Practice patience.   Try this exercise - read through your post and make one list of the positive developments and another of things you cannot control (including the future). If you have a sense of spirituality, offer the second list as a sacrifice to however you understand a higher power - leave it in their hands. If you're not spiritual, then offer it up to hope. Then throw that list away. Keep the list of positives and leave some room on it because guaranteed you'll have more and more to add. Look forward to that, but don't let your mind think it can rush things. Try to enjoy the ride. 
    • Vidanjali
      Happy birthday, Sam! Lotsa love!
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I still have not read much of this.  Very little of this document pertains to trans folk.  Some of the statements are more than problematic concerning trans folk.   It certainly was not written just to get us.   " those with gender dysphoria should be expelled from military service."  and "Reverse policies that allow transgender individuals to serve in the military. Gender dysphoria is incompatible with the demands of military service,"  https://static.project2025.org/2025_MandateForLeadership_CHAPTER-04.pdf are two lines out of hundreds if not thousands regarding the Department of Defense, targeting trans folk in an almost off-hand manner.    So if a fighter pilot, say, or a ship's captain, highly experienced and trained at enormous expense, is determined to be transgender (method unknown) the US loses someone badly needed due to the personnel shortage who is ready, willing and able to perform their duties.  Many trans folk have served well and transitioned later.  I don't think this point is well thought out.    A number of policy recommendations I would disagree with.  I am not sure there is a method to discuss those with the authors; I am attempting to find out.  I have good conservative creds.    They are fully intending to implement this, regardless of who the president is, as long as that president is conservative. It is not Trump centered.  I don't think he had anything to do with it. 
    • April Marie
      I wear a Delimira Mastectomy sleep bra with Vollence sleep rated breast forms. The form fit inside pockets so they don't touch your skin. I bought the bras on Amazon and found the forms on eBay. They were much less expensive than buying through the other sources. 
    • Ashley0616
      I wore an olive corduroy coverall dress with a navy blue shirt underneath. 
    • Ashley0616
      @LittleSamCongratulations on one of the biggest decisions. Looking forward to your progress. 
    • Ivy
      I don't wear a bra to bed.  The girls aren't big enough to need it, but still enough to appreciate.  Just a flannel nightgown suits me fine.
    • Ashley0616
      You're welcome. I'm here quite often if you need me. 
    • Ashley0616
    • Ivy
      Yeah, that is the point.  And of course they can be proud of themselves for saving humanity.   Yeah.  That would be scary.  I'd find a bush somewhere like our GOP governor candidate recommends.  So far I've gotten away with the women's.  I've been told I pass better than I realize.  But it would only take one a55h0le.   This is all so stupid.  I mean, who gets off on hanging out in a bathroom?
    • Ashley0616
      Oh yes. It was not fun cleaning it up but he is better.
    • FinnyFinsterHH
      Thank you! 
    • missyjo
      sound  nice ...I been using a sleep bra with soft forms from knitted knockers..send a donation if you use them..I just sent my preferred size etc..works ok..gives my chest break from silicone touching..   how far back should I look to see about the ones you're using from Susan?   hugs 
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...