1st Appt For Gt All Set, Major Revelations From Wife

[Guest yvonne]

Hello Dear Sisters,

I had originally set up an initial appointment with a GT, who called and canceled it the day before the appt. She told me she was very sorry and she had health issues of her own and shouldn't take on a new patient "who would have such a long journey". She said she was sorry to "set me back weeks on my journey".

I was very nice about it and told her, "It's already been 60 years, what's another few weeks!!!" We both laughed and she sent me some recommendations for her replacement.

I finally reached her top choice and we had a great conversation. I'd decided to be very direct in telling her my initial expectations of the result of the therapy, as I've observed from the other sisters here (thank you very much).

I initially gave a short description of my life-long struggle to understand my mental state and torment. I told her that in the last 3 or 4 years, I'd gradually began to understand WHY I had the emotions that I did. I went on to say that I'd accepted my true identity in the last year, come out to my wife within the last month and, while she was initially somewhat supportive, she drew the line at anything more than therapy. I told the GT that, after the resolution with my wife I'd felt my head had cleared, I've never had this much clarity in my mind, ever, and I was now mentally calm and extremely productive. (Extremely productive is a serious understatement--I'm on fire with creativity and positive thoughts).

What I hoped to accomplish with therapy was to go through the standard 90-day process to verify that I did, in fact, suffer from GID and get approved for HRT, which I felt was the next logical step in a very positive process for me.

The GT surprised me when she said the old standards were going away and they've found it easier than ever to get a positive diagnosis. She said I sounded like the perfect candidate and the process seemed like a logical objective to pursue, that it may not take much time at all, based on where I apparently was. WOOOOOOHOOOOOOO!!!

I told the GT that I was not a candidate for SRS, that I intended to compromise with dual gender roles She said she's known some who have done that and we'd talk about it.

In my mind, I've been cross-dressing each day to go to work (presenting as a male) and get to relax in my clothes at the end of the day. This has worked very well for me so far. I feel very good about myself, feel like I'm being true to myself and am happy with the compromise. The main thing for me is my inner identity and feelings about myself, which have been very positive with this arrangement.

So, I have an initial appointment set up for the next few days to get this thing going. I'm on top of the world.

Back to the wife. We had a long talk today (one of a whole bunch we've been having on a daily basis). She's been very impressed with my mental state, how happy I've been and how productive I've been since "the talk". I guided the conversation toward her fears that I'd become a "whiney old beach". She cited several girlfriends with that malady and talked about what hormones do every month.

I said that whiney people have always been whiney, regardless of hormones or the time of the month. She's had a radical hysterectomy many years ago and was herself on HRT for a long time. I asked her if she still had the cycles of moods. She said those pretty much went away with the ovaries. Fine, I said, so a controlled, steady release didn't seem to have the cycles? No, she said.

Case closed, I said. I've never been whiney and can't imagine becoming that way. I did say there would be more emotions, which is normal, but not a totally whiney person.

She's seen how much this has affected me in a positive way and can finally see the positive side of resolving this intense inner conflict I've lived with for so many years. I think she'll be fine with it and she has as much said so.

What a great day. Thanks for listening. The next step is at hand. I'm looking forward to the therapy. I expect to learn a lot, I expect to be very uncomfortable at times, I expect to find more answers about myself, I expect it to be at times painful and at times joyful. I expect to find that some things I thought I knew I really didn't and some things I thought I didn't, that I really did. I'm ready and eager.

Yvonne

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Hi Yvonne,

It is wonderful to see the great strides you are making with your self-awareness and understanding. It is also good to see that you are going to see a GT to help sort out your feelings about yourself. I am glad that you have a supporting wife and a supporting environment in general. That helps a lot!!

Your patience with yourself and everyone is very positive. Patience will help you through all of this. Just so that you know who you are will always be the same. You will not loose yourself in this process. Yourself will actually become more realized

I wish you all the best.

Love

Brenda

[Carolyn Marie]

Good for you, Yvonne. I'm so happy for you that you found a good G.T. that you can relate well to. You seem to have a wonderful attitude and know

your mind and your path forward. There are many who cannot say that, so you are doing very well.

I'm also glad to hear of your wife's newfound comfort level and acceptance of your transition. It will be so much easier on you to have that support.

You are very lucky and I do hope you tell your wife often how much that means to you. It is a rare and wonderful thing.

There have been a lot of posts like yours in the last few days. It is heartwarming and encouraging to read all the good news. There are a lot of us

on this path together, and I look forward to sharing the joys of transition with you and Amanda and all the others.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest yvonne]

Hi Yvonne,

It is wonderful to see the great strides you are making with your self-awareness and understanding. It is also good to see that you are going to see a GT to help sort out your feelings about yourself. I am glad that you have a supporting wife and a supporting environment in general. That helps a lot!!

Brenda Dear,

You've really helped me see some things I would have otherwise missed. I'm certain I'm missing enough as it is.

Your patience with yourself and everyone is very positive. Patience will help you through all of this. Just so that you know who you are will always be the same. You will not loose yourself in this process. Yourself will actually become more realized

It's funny that you would mention patience. My inner acceptance has suddenly allowed the real me to come out. I used to be terribly impatient, bordering on rude at times, with simple things. I was more patient on the longer term things. In retrospect, I was ready to explode from the inner tension. I was probably what you may call a "ticking time-bomb". This has been very hard on me and caused me great pain and stress over the years.

Since I've accepted the real me and understood that it's fine to love who you REALLY are, my patience has really come out. I've become the patron-saint of patience--even many strangers have commented on it. It just seems that almost nothing can tick me off now. You helped me understand why. You're one of the reasons I love to participate here. The experience has been very positive for me.

A warm, lasting hug,

Yvonne

\

I wish you all the best.

Love

Brenda

[Guest ChloëC]

Hi Yvonne,

What a wonderful story and a great attitude. And an understanding spouse. I could only feel good as I read about all the positive things happening to you at this time.

I know it's been an uplifting time for you, and I wish you all the best as you continue, but it is so great to read stories like that, and I'm sure it's helpful to others to see that there are positive moments that may be ahead for them as they are there for you.

Thank you for posting it for us.

Hugs

Chloë

[Guest angie]

Hello Dear Sisters,

Back to the wife. We had a long talk today (one of a whole bunch we've been having on a daily basis). She's been very impressed with my mental state, how happy I've been and how productive I've been since "the talk". I guided the conversation toward her fears that I'd become a "whiney old beach". She cited several girlfriends with that malady and talked about what hormones do every month.

She's seen how much this has affected me in a positive way and can finally see the positive side of resolving this intense inner conflict I've lived with for so many years. I think she'll be fine with it and she has as much said so.

What a great day. Thanks for listening. The next step is at hand. I'm looking forward to the therapy. I expect to learn a lot, I expect to be very uncomfortable at times, I expect to find more answers about myself, I expect it to be at times painful and at times joyful. I expect to find that some things I thought I knew I really didn't and some things I thought I didn't, that I really did. I'm ready and eager.

Yvonne

Congratulations a Biiiig Hug and a kiss on the lips for that post Yvonne.MMMMMWwwwwwaaa!!!

That was so positive and it seems things may go your way.(good girl)

Angie

Bye The Way...

My ex had a radical hysterectomy at 26 and is mooooody when her hormones aren't in balance.

[Guest Joanna Phipps]

Congratulations on the way things are going, the only thing I will take exception to is the lack of cycles. I have been noticing that I get sleepy, weepy and grumpy about every 28 or so days. Talking with others on here it is more common than you might think. I am on a steady dose of Estrogen with no builtin progestrone cycle.

[Guest angie]

Congratulations on the way things are going, the only thing I will take exception to is the lack of cycles. I have been noticing that I get sleepy, weepy and grumpy about every 28 or so days. Talking with others on here it is more common than you might think. I am on a steady dose of Estrogen with no builtin progestrone cycle.

Estrogen when it is peaking,can make us snappy and weepy.About the grumpy I don't know,I don't

experience that part that I know of.

Angie

[Guest nymphblossom]

Yvonne,

It is important to help your wife understand that HRT is the standard treatment for Gender Dysphoria. Your brain is chomping at the bit to express its female self, the reason you are compelled to make mannerism, grooming and clothing changes. But that is all a superficial Halloween costume, our silly preconceived social notions of how a woman is supposed to act and look, a stopgap our brains are willing to accept to help them cope. What transsexuals need, MUST treat is our GENDER DYSPHORIA, the living hell of trying to lock our female selves away. This boulder around our necks is the reason for HRT.

And it is not so much that our brains are starving for estrogen as they are in agony, screaming from years of being bombarded with testosterone. This can be remedied with testosterone blockers/orchiectomy, but that creates an even bigger problem- the body must have hormones to function properly. And the only alternative is to supply it with female hormones.

Had we been born as a natal female with a body that produces estrogen, had been exposed to higher prenatal estogen levels or even higher prepuberty estrogen levels, the physical effects would be dramatic. But for a male body that has been pumped full of testosterone for the best part of its life, the changes due to estrogen are subtle; softer skin, finer body hair, shifting of fat/renewable soft tissue and minor breast development. A wonderfully desirable side effect, the resulting feminization is NOT the purpose for HRT. The purpose is to create the synergy between the estrogen and the brain that my male body has been

unable to accomplish since the day we were conceived.

Blossom