Perplexed By My Situation.

[Guest katie019]

Okay, so I have been thinking, I cannot stand this lifestyle with the army and all. Like, im counting down my days till I get out. Buuut, I don't know if I want to just yet. Like, the only thing that is influencing this is afghanistan. I don't want to be in the army now, yet, I feel like im needed over there. I feel like, I am supposed to be over there helping them out. I mean, I just got back from iraq on the 14th of august, but I guess I feel like I should be helping. Ya know? Then when that tours done get out. I was thinking of extending my cantract till around the time I would be getting back. But I really hate the army lifestyle. Like, I really wanna transition supa bad. I just don't know what to do. Any opinions or advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanx,

Katie.

[Guest van-na]

Hi Katie,

<<hug>>

Thanks for serving.

I can see your problem.

I'm sorry but I can't tell you what you should do.

It sounds to me like you have already given allot to your country.

I doubt anyone would fault you for not re-upping.

I think we will be in Afghanistan for a very long time.

You do not have to stay in the army to help your country.

There are many other ways that you can give your support.

I think the decision is surly a tough one.

I wish you the best of luck however you decide.

vanna

[Guest rachael1]

Hi Katie,

I agree with Vanna, you have already served your country - far more than most and now it is time to look after yourself.

I admire your selfless attitude but think that no-one would begrudge you handing over the baton.

At the end of the day it is up to you but you have to consider whether your mental health and wellbeing can stand another tour of duty?

Rachael

[Guest Donna Jean]

Katie......

Here's my take on it, ok?

I did a tour in Vietnam...Combat crew in C-130's...

Saw plenty...

When it was time...did I re-up?

No....I wasn't a "One Person" war machine...there were many to follow and each could do their duty...

So, Honey....

You did your time, paid your dues, did your duty...now it's time you hang up the combat boots and let the next ones do their duty..

You can't win it alone and you have a transition to attend to.....right?

Let it go, Baby...

Stay home with all of us...

LOVE

Donna Jean

[Guest Gloria13]

Katie,

I served as a Corpsman in Viet Nam, I know what it feels like to want to get out but the feeling of leaving something undone is nagging at you. The people here have all given good advice, but I can only offer you one piece of advice. FOLLOW YOUR HEART, that is where you will find the answer.

Gloria HM1/USN/RET

[Guest Gina9223]

Katie,

I’ve talked with a few transgender service members who are active the past few years. I did 20 years myself in the Navy. Honestly, this is your choice. Heck, it’s your life to live as you see fit.

But…

If you just got back from Afghanistan now is the time to walk over to medical and talk to a therapist or call up Military One Source and request a referral to a offsite (off base) mental health provider (psychologist). Now is the time to start therapy. From what I’ve been hearing (and my last Army transitioner just exited) they won’t simply toss you out. They will want to shrink you head real good before they do that. I have one who’s taken the Military One Source route and is 6 months from her EAOS and is on HRT NOW! Her command doesn’t even have contact with her shrink.

The one who just got out of the Army? She went to medical and talked to the therapist she had already. It took me months of talking to her to get her to open up…

And that’s the other issue. You are in the highest stressed job known. Being from one of the highest stress jobs in the Navy I know how much stress can eat at you. You’ll be thinking of this and not the job at hand. If you get in a bad spot over there… I know two who broke down. One in Iraq and one in Afghanistan.

It’s hard to even remember what they endured coming back. Admittedly it was early in the conflicts. I think the troops are starting to be a bit more empathetic towards fellow soldiers. But you’ll never know until it’s too late.

Currently they’re looking at repealing DADT. I’ve talked to people that are in the midst of that where it counts. The bus isn’t even gonna slow down for Transgender or Intersexed troops.

You are better at starting now by going to medical and talking or calling up Military One Source and finding a therapist and talking and for either way trying to start HRT and begin making an exit plan and leaving.

You have done your duty, you have stood where others fail, you have made us all proud… you deserve to enjoy your life, your liberty and your happiness.

PM me if you want and we can talk.

Gina

[Guest ChloëC]

Katie,

I'm also a veteran of the VietNam era. I volunteered and was very positive about serving. And I did so getting some letters of commendation, and during my first tour (in a peaceful assignment) seriously considered volunteering for Viet Nam, but my situation changed and I knew I should start getting on with the rest of my life, so I made a different choice.

Unless you are seriously considering making the military your career, which is an honorable choice, you need to be thinking about your own life and where you want to be when you do get out. At the time my future was education and I had no fear walking into offices and talking to higher ranking people, because it's something I knew I had to do. Not quite the same as seeing therapists, but it is simliar in that I was able to get an early release and start doing what I wanted to be doing. I needed letters and recommendations and approvals and just kept it until they were all in order. And it worked.

You've done your duty, and we're all proud of you for that. Now focus on what you want.

Chloë

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Katie,

Do what you think is right in your heart. I admire your willingness to extend your contract and help in Afganistan.

Thank you for your service

Bless you

Brenda

[Guest katie019]

Thank you all very much. You have been very very helpful. I think im gonna pass on extending my contract and istead, I am going to contact a therapist then go from there. Thank you all.

Huggles ^-^,

katie

[Guest viv]

Okay, so I have been thinking, I cannot stand this lifestyle with the army and all. Like, im counting down my days till I get out. Buuut, I don't know if I want to just yet. Like, the only thing that is influencing this is afghanistan. I don't want to be in the army now, yet, I feel like im needed over there. I feel like, I am supposed to be over there helping them out. I mean, I just got back from iraq on the 14th of august, but I guess I feel like I should be helping. Ya know? Then when that tours done get out. I was thinking of extending my cantract till around the time I would be getting back. But I really hate the army lifestyle. Like, I really wanna transition supa bad. I just don't know what to do. Any opinions or advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thanx,

Katie.

Hi Katie,

Hope you dont mind an outsiders opinion. You folk never turned your back on those who cried out for help and it has cost your country dearly.

Many a time I have watched the news and been so saddened at the loss of another peace keeper. May their families , somehow, find peace. But you

know what Katie ?, theres only so many times you can put your shoulder to the wheel . You have to think of your self, theres a limit.....you know ??.

Please Katie, take on board the advice of the more informed people here . Im just a person with a lot of respect you people and your country .

Sincerely, viv.

[Guest DeniseNM]

Katie here is my opinion about what you are going through. I know I went through some of the kinds of thoughts and all when I got back from Iraq and I know others have too. I think part of it is because we have been in combat and we have seen the "hell" that combat is and even though we don't like combat we also don't want others who have never had to go through what we have been through to go through it and see what we have seen. Also coming back from combat I know we have a tendency to feel like we don't belong here in the "real world" anymore and don't really connect with people here and we know that over there we feel "normal" and so we look to go back. All of this is just my opinion from my own esperience and from talking to other veterans who have been where we have been. Katie just know that you do need to get back to your life and it will get better.

Denise