Tossing The Women's Clothes Out Of My Closet

[Guest yvonne]

Hi there Special Sisters,

I've been posting about my life long mental conflicts over my gender identity and my recent total acceptance of the true female me. I mean I'm a girl and have become very comfortable with that. It's brought me peace, inner satisfaction and a clear head like I've never experienced before.

But, I digress.... I'm very near to getting my "letter" and my first physician's appointment as a girl, so I can finally start the physical fix to match my brain. Well, my closet is cluttered and I'm cleaning out a lot of the men's clothes I'm certain I won't ever be wearing again (like my Tee Shirt collection, for, shall we say obvious reasons, I can think of 2 ). So, no big surprise there and as I'm doing this, I'm realizing some of this stuff brings out a little hostility in me. Whoa, didn't realize that.

At any rate, I have a ton of stuff from my old cross-dressing days. Back then, clothing that was female was good enough. I couldn't try anything on before I bought it, so I have stuff that doesn't fit, things that don't match and, those dreaded things that looked great in the catalog and just awful on me when I put them on . I couldn't bring myself to get rid of some of it before, because, after all, it was women's clothes and that did carry a substantial magic to it.

It's interesting how I've changed over the last year as I settle in and the compulsive behavior has completely disappeared. The magic that I saw in the panties and pantihose hanging up, waiting for me to get out of the shower is gone. There is no magic there, no "turn-on", just my clothes. Yes, my clothes, what I wear every day and have now, for a number of years. I finally found some very nice panties that fit me perfect, hold everything nicely in it's place (which I wish didn't have to be done, but that's another story). I bought 14 pairs in many pretty colors, so I don't have to do laundry frequently. But the point is, it's all nice, it all fits and it's my clothes. My clothes.

So, I also have some hostility toward those cross-dressing days, as well and it's making me feel good to get rid of that stuff, as I let the new me emerge into the fresh air and light.

I wrote recently of calling a nice store ahead of time and arranging a "personal shopper" to help me shop and allow me to try things on before I buy them. I got 4 very nice outfits, slacks and tops that I can mix and match a little, to go with some nice skirts and jeans that I already had.

Those clothes fit me and they really look nice. They make me look nice and feel good. Very good. I'm not into fashion at all, but there's a lot to be said for putting on an outfit that you like, that enhances how you look. It's good for the soul.

So, I'm totally done with my old cross dressing days. I still have to present as a male during the day, hence my "new cross-dressing days". I love getting home at night and putting on my clothes and relaxing, getting into my kitchen and back to my element of comfort. It's a wonderful thing.

So, I'm cleaning out a lot and organizing my new closet with my new clothes to go with my new life.

I no longer have shame or disgust with my cross-dressing. For you see, I'm not a cross-dresser. I'm just a girl, enjoying being a girl and wearing my clothes, like a normal girl.

Thanks for being here so I can share this joyful moment.

Enjoy your clothes, too, my special sisters.

Yvonne

[Guest Donna Jean]

Yvonne!

LOL, Sweetheart!

That a great post!

How liberating...right?

Here I sit, cross dressed, too....in male drag, ready to go to work!

Don't it feel so comfortable to just be in YOUR clothes and doing your thing?

My closet got cleaned also...a few male things stayed...for instance...6 pair of those old work pants to be used to when I use the weed eater to keep the grass off my pretty legs!

I'm actually having a lot of fun watching you get all geared up....lol Your joy is contagious!

LOVE

Donna Jean

[Guest yvonne]

Yvonne!

LOL, Sweetheart!

That a great post!

How liberating...right?

Here I sit, cross dressed, too....in male drag, ready to go to work!

Don't it feel so comfortable to just be in YOUR clothes and doing your thing?

My closet got cleaned also...a few male things stayed...for instance...6 pair of those old work pants to be used to when I use the weed eater to keep the grass off my pretty legs!

I'm actually having a lot of fun watching you get all geared up....lol Your joy is contagious!

LOVE

Donna Jean

Sweet Donna Jean,

It's funny how this works. As a cross-dresser, I was doing something "I wasn't supposed to be doing" and had to keep it hidden. It was a thrill to get away with it, a thrill to pull out some of those awful clothes. I experienced some shame inside as a result and much conflict.

You're right, it does feel comfortable and it feels right to be in my clothes and doing my thing. It's been cold where I'm at recently and Sunday I had on a nice skirt and rather thin, low-cut blouse. I was freezing, so I switched to slacks. The slacks were a thin material and I was still freezing with no socks on.

I finally put on jeans, socks and a heavier, less revealing top. My wife said I'll get over the high-fashion stuff before too long and be like the rest of the girls and dress more comfortably, so I could be warmer.

When I put on a nice outfit now, I feel immense pride in myself. I'm proud to be a woman and I take pride in my appearance. I've been moisturizing my face, hands and arms and, especially the expectant and eager girls. I wouldn't want to get stretch marks when those DDs strike suddenly in the night, you know.

I'm so proud that I've accepted my true identity, so proud to be on my journey and have a joyful heart over all of it. I'm really at peace with myself now. It truly does feel good to get rid of some of that stuff, it's like I'm ridding myself of some of my past hang-ups. As I do it, however, the good feelings are mixed with some tension. I realize that I did have a serious amount of hostility built up within me. What a shame.

But, I'm proud now. Proud to be a girl.

Thanks for your support, girlfriend.

Hugs

Yvonne

[Guest angie]

Hey there,

I was one of us ladies that purged my female wear over and over and over.Vowing I would quit wearing womens wear forever.UmmHmm sure.The very last time I tried to put her away for good

I thought,I washed and folded everything,panties,skirts,dresses and blouses.I used a full roll of

strapping tape,that made a perfect block.There she is gone forever.It wasn't long afterward,that

the siren call to my womanhood came knocking,and I gave into the urge again.This last time I knew would be my last.I quit fighting who I knew I was,instead chose to follow my heart and become the

woman I have always known was inside.

The male wear went first.As I gave away all my finest dress clothes to a worthy charity.My jeans tees and shoes I wore until I worn them out,an item at a time.And believe me,tree trimming and land clearing,wears out clothes fast,as they are ripped to shreds by the branches and brambles by a couple of items a day.I knew there was no way I would be replacing them,not with the real me on her way.It was two years this past August when I wore the last of my old wear.I gathered what was left,and with absolutley no regrets,chunked them in the dumpster.Good Bye D forever.

The fantasy we used to have about dressing,loses it's allure as real life as a woman sets in.This isn't a game or fantasy,this wont be part time dressing.And our tastes in womens wear also shifts to a different mode.We buy clothes that actually fit,and undies that do also.And the collection we once

loved,is cast off to the side.Enjoy this time of purging the past,for real life trumps a fantasy everytime.Well done my sister well done.Enjoy rebuilding your wardrobe,this time as a woman.

Warmest Hugs,and I sure like your posts Ms Yvonne.

Angelique

[Guest Joanna Phipps]

I was sorting out one of our storage closets the other day and bumped into the boxes of his old clothes. The odd thing was it felt like they were never mine to begin with more like I was looking at stuff that and xbf left behind and now I just had to do something with. Its odd, and facinating how attitudes can change in less than 6 months.

Those clothes are going away forever

[Sally]

Congratulations to all of you wonderful ladies in having come to terms mentally with what society has long ago told us was wrong.

As is so often the case, society was wrong everyone is not the same and to say that anyone who is different is wrong is typical.

Enjoy being who you really are and don't ever feel guilty again.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest viv]

Hi Yvonne,

I love to read good news from our sisters , they can be so infectious , and I feel good reading yours hun. You really have embraced your

womanhood and yes , I agree, its so good to get home and put some "proper" clothes on ( i hate mens stuff ) . Badly fitting clothes ???

oh I can relate to that one!!!, in my early days I used to go to the charity shops - I would whizz around the rails like crazy so embarrased and hope

half the stuff would fit !!guess what?? optimism does not make em fit lol. Now I drive out of town and just buy , I know my size so much less bad

buys. Post again soon hun, luv, viv.

[Guest Heather taru]

That sounds very liberating. I too have begun to purge my male clothes. I refuse to buy new ones and got rid of several items recently. Just simply doing that, thinking to myself that I buy few if any more male clothes is very satisfying. Now if

congrats! I am learning to savor the little things during transition...hold on to it.

[Carolyn Marie]

Yvonne, you always have something uplifting and positive to say and its a treat to read your posts.

I can imagine how exciting and affirming it is to get rid of the clothes that kept you imprisoned in

your male role all your life. To be free to be yourself is a wonderful thing, and I envy you.

I look forward to that day too. I still need to present male at work for now, but in the next year, I

hope to change that little by little and follow Paula Ult's strategy for baby steps. I have a couple of

turtle neck sweaters that I plan to substitute for dress shirts to wear with my suits. No one will know

but me, but that doesn't matter. I will know they are women's wear. I already wear women's

boots every day. I can foresee the day not too long from now when I can do as you just did.

It's great to be able to share those accomplishments, isn't it?

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest qRachelp]

Hi there Special Sisters,

I've been posting about my life long mental conflicts over my gender identity and my recent total acceptance of the true female me. I mean I'm a girl and have become very comfortable with that. It's brought me peace, inner satisfaction and a clear head like I've never experienced before.

But, I digress.... I'm very near to getting my "letter" and my first physician's appointment as a girl, so I can finally start the physical fix to match my brain. Well, my closet is cluttered and I'm cleaning out a lot of the men's clothes I'm certain I won't ever be wearing again (like my Tee Shirt collection, for, shall we say obvious reasons, I can think of 2 ). So, no big surprise there and as I'm doing this, I'm realizing some of this stuff brings out a little hostility in me. Whoa, didn't realize that.

At any rate, I have a ton of stuff from my old cross-dressing days. Back then, clothing that was female was good enough. I couldn't try anything on before I bought it, so I have stuff that doesn't fit, things that don't match and, those dreaded things that looked great in the catalog and just awful on me when I put them on . I couldn't bring myself to get rid of some of it before, because, after all, it was women's clothes and that did carry a substantial magic to it.

It's interesting how I've changed over the last year as I settle in and the compulsive behavior has completely disappeared. The magic that I saw in the panties and pantihose hanging up, waiting for me to get out of the shower is gone. There is no magic there, no "turn-on", just my clothes. Yes, my clothes, what I wear every day and have now, for a number of years. I finally found some very nice panties that fit me perfect, hold everything nicely in it's place (which I wish didn't have to be done, but that's another story). I bought 14 pairs in many pretty colors, so I don't have to do laundry frequently. But the point is, it's all nice, it all fits and it's my clothes. My clothes.

So, I also have some hostility toward those cross-dressing days, as well and it's making me feel good to get rid of that stuff, as I let the new me emerge into the fresh air and light.

I wrote recently of calling a nice store ahead of time and arranging a "personal shopper" to help me shop and allow me to try things on before I buy them. I got 4 very nice outfits, slacks and tops that I can mix and match a little, to go with some nice skirts and jeans that I already had.

Those clothes fit me and they really look nice. They make me look nice and feel good. Very good. I'm not into fashion at all, but there's a lot to be said for putting on an outfit that you like, that enhances how you look. It's good for the soul.

So, I'm totally done with my old cross dressing days. I still have to present as a male during the day, hence my "new cross-dressing days". I love getting home at night and putting on my clothes and relaxing, getting into my kitchen and back to my element of comfort. It's a wonderful thing.

So, I'm cleaning out a lot and organizing my new closet with my new clothes to go with my new life.

I no longer have shame or disgust with my cross-dressing. For you see, I'm not a cross-dresser. I'm just a girl, enjoying being a girl and wearing my clothes, like a normal girl.

Thanks for being here so I can share this joyful moment.

Enjoy your clothes, too, my special sisters.

Yvonne

Greeeat post! I feel the SAME WAY, Yvonne. And from what I've read, the very fact that your old cross-dressing clothes no longer "excite" you indeed lets you KNOW that you are a girl, and not just some guy wearing women's clothes; it just took your body a little while to catch up with your mind.

[Guest yvonne]

Greeeat post! I feel the SAME WAY, Yvonne. And from what I've read, the very fact that your old cross-dressing clothes no longer "excite" you indeed lets you KNOW that you are a girl, and not just some guy wearing women's clothes; it just took your body a little while to catch up with your mind.

This has been an interesting aspect to my transition. Not only do my cross-dressing clothes NOT excite me in any way, not at all, but they appear to tick me off a little. I've only come to realize this just recently. Part of me just wants to lock that closet door and not deal with the pain of opening it, but my rational side says it's better if I do deal with it now.

Tossing it out bit by bit (just to be sure the items aren't usable and desirable to me now) makes me feel better. However, a little later I can tell there's hostility there. Funny, I never thought I'd EVER be hostile toward women's clothes.

When I see my current clothes, I experience pride, self esteem and I feel good. I mean I feel good like I've never felt.

My only regret is that it took me so long to get it through my thick skull..... I can certainly understand why, however, given the times I grew up in.

All that is over now. I'm free at last. Free at last. Thank God almighty, I'm free at last. I'm free of all the demons, compulsions and conflict of the past.

Sorry, there I go again. Geeze. I guess I'd better go back and stare at my new closet and calm down.

Wishing you all a pretty outfit,

Yvonne