My Awesome Neighbour And Friend

[Guest i is Sam :-)]

A couple of months back now I guess it must of been (wow sometimes in transition time seems so slow and then you realise how much has passed already) some of you might remember me posting about the people I already had and still had to come out to. The one I was really worried about, not because I thought he wouldn't accept it but just because it seemed like too much information for someone I wasn't that close to was my neighbour.

Well I told him, it was about 6 weeks ago. I spoke to him online because it's easier for me to be honest about myself when I don't have to speak aloud. He was immediately cool with it, and I thought great, but then wondered if we'd actually stay friends or if we'd just feel too awkward around each other.

The next day we spent almost the whole day together, went out to the supermarket, played some xbox, he struggled to ask a couple of questions, in the usual awkwardness, where we avoid using any specific words and instead rely on euphamisms and trailing off sentences etc.

Since then it's gotten easier to talk honestly, I somewhat eased him into it by not pushing it with what I wore around him for a while, and then just let it get more obvious, now my only concern is if other friends of his or neighbours come round while I'm at his place. We'd reached the point where I knew I could be totally myself when we went out for something to eat the week before last, and I stretched and complained that my bra was killing me.

If anything we've grown closer, we spent quite a lot of time together when I first moved in but as the depression started getting the best of me again I became more and more withdrawn. I'm doing much better now, and being able to feel comfortable around him makes it that much easier.

But the best part, which is what makes him so awesome is the relationship we now have

It's absolutely exactly what I wanted, he doesn't try to treat me like a girl and feel awkward doing it, and tip toe on egg shells. He treats me as if I'm a girl who is "one of the guys" which is what i've always been, people just didn't know it. We still laugh and generally have fun together, this is all very new to him, and he'll mess up on terms or say things that we'd consider incorrect and I'll mock being offended and correct him, and he panics for a second before realising that i'm making him uncomfortable on purpose to screw with him. He knows that I don't mind if it takes him a while to get it all right, like not calling me dude, because he just straight up accepts it, there's no prejudice or malice or hate or unwillingness to learn. and that's what matters.

And he's comfortable enough to joke with me, he'll make (ironically) typical chauvinisitc jokes, and will say things like "it's always nice to have a girl over for dinner" I guess that might sound like covering for feeling uncomfortable but we're friends, there isn't more to it, we make each other laugh and take the mick. He does care for me, and would come check on me when he hadn't seen me in days when I was depressed, and we help each other out if needed.

And then yesterday I wanted to talk to him, because his 7 year old daughter will be coming down for easter, and I was worried and I was worried about if he'd be ok with her seeing me, and more importantly that if she said something to his ex she might use it against him. He just told me that if his ex has a problem then that's her problem and that he wants his daughter to grow up to be accepting and open minded and doesn't want to hide her from things.

So yeah if anything I feel more awkward about it than he does.

Anyways I know I've gone on a bit, and there's no real moral to this story, except to say that almost everyone I've told so far has been really great, and just because I thought he deserved some praise, he's really helped me find it easier to be more open and not quite so afraid of becoming an outcast.

Tho I probably won't show him this post.

[Guest ~Brenda~]

Sam hon,

I am very glad to hear that you have been able to come out to your neighbor and he is accepting of you

Whew!! That is a relief for you. I wish more people were like your neighbor. We wouldn't have it so hard then.

Love

Brenda

[Guest Donna Jean]

Sam......

I loved it....

How nice......

Nothing earth shaking or epic....just an accepting and wonderful friendship...

That was a wonderful post, hon....I'd love to see so many more like that from people...

You hold onto that friend...ones like him are hard to come by in any gender!

Happy Huggs....

Donna Jean

[Guest viv]

Brilliant Sam,,,knowing folk like that makes life so much easier .

Now you can hang your "smalls" on the garden line in peace lol.

luv,viv

[Guest i is Sam :-)]

in a block of flats so there's still 7 other neighbours to come out to. I don't know many of them though, so they're just gonna have to notice.

[Guest viv]

Best of luck with that Sam ,,viv,