Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Voice


Guest Elizabeth K

Recommended Posts

Guest Elizabeth K

MTF I guess - writing something that may not help FTM, but then FTM seem to get their voice from the "T." We MTF do not get much help from the estrogen and have to practice.

WELL

After over a year of practice - I could get 'a voice' that passes but I kept slipping lower when I tried to stay with it, like the hour talking with my therapist.

It is so much to remember: (1) tone) (2) pitch (3) inflection (4) vocabulary (5) that feminine uplifting lilt at the ends of sentenses - all combined with 'content!" (what I was trying to say). AUGGGGHHHHHH

Then I had a revelation. I was trying to get - A GIRL VOICE! It was like trying to 'learn to walk like a girl!' Too contrived. So often sooooo overdone!

I had already learned that to 'walk like a girl,' I became a girl. That simple. That works with everything - just BE a female! All else follows.

THEN

I realized - I AM female - always have been.

So I was not trying to get - A GIRL VOICE - I already am a girl - well, a woman now - I already have a voice! So I am using it!

Somehow, that works so well!

I just shut out the pretend male stuff - that macho voice I had to train myself to use, that idea i want to 'command and instruct' people how to do things. We women only want to communicate and be heard. We don't necessarily want to explain everything, although we WILL provide plenty of details - grin.

I still work on (1) tone) (2) pitch (3) inflection (4) vocabulary (5) that feminine uplifting lilt at the ends of sentenses - but its already there. I just tap into it.

SO SIMPLE.

Lizzy

Link to comment

Lizzy you are so right in your revelation. A FTM that I know has it so easy. He doesnt have to do anything to make his voice pass. I still am working on mine, 2 years in the making. Guess we cant get everything from the magical "E". Sometimes I can get my voice to stay at a decent pitch and tone. I just try and raise it slightly, but volume ends up being very low. I also am a bit hard of hearing from playing drums in bands for many years, which aids to my difficulties with pitch and volume. Practice Practice Practice....

Thanks for the post... hopefully it will be good advice for some that are trying to find their female voice.

Hugs,

Cris

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean
I still work on (1) tone) (2) pitch (3) inflection (4) vocabulary (5) that feminine uplifting lilt at the ends of sentenses - but its already there. I just tap into it.

SO SIMPLE.

Lizzy

Ah, Lizzy.....

I see that you tapped into my motto!

LOL...

But, I've had a heck of a time working on mine...

I did get gendered on the phone as female a few weeks back...that's good.

It was at work....That's bad.

But I work on my voice on the way to work and back..singing and talking to myself!

It's slowly getting there!

Huggs

Donna Jean

Link to comment

Hey Lizzy,

I am glad that you have finally realized that!

It has taken you a long time but if you think back to Memphis I have never really worked that much on my voice - the vocabulary is never a problem, the lilt was always there but has become much more pronounced as soon as I accepted myself as the woman that I have always been - the pitch is still low but then ever listen to Bea Arther, Kathleen Turner or Lauren Hutton?

We are living on the assumption that we are still pretending - we had less fear of being found out that we were not males so now we are to spend the rest of our lives pretending and fearing of discovery that we were not born female.

Not for me - I am who I am and at last I am showing the world, little by little until I drop my male persona completely and that day is coming - to be free of all pretending - that is my dream and I am not going to worry about my voice since no one else has.

Love ya,

Sally

Link to comment
Guest Melanieshaman

I haven't worked on mine yet, but my wife tells me my voice isn't all that mainly..or deep. I guess because it's coming out of my head i hear it differently... not sure how to change it exactly, but it is something i hope to really work on soon.

Melanie

Link to comment
Guest Charlene_Leona

Before my orchiectomy my voice was rather deep and gravely and some said I sounded like Marlena Detrick and I had given up on a female voice beyond that. But 13 days after my voice did go through a change. I've been called a liar by allot of MTF's saying that this is is impossible. But since then I have worked hard to find the right voice for me to speak in. Even though I have a convincing female voice I still pay allot of attention to my voice but I don't think I'm pretending in any way shape or form. I think the harder you try the easier it is going to be for someone to clock you. You should just find your voice that's comfortable for you to speak in and give up on forcing the voice out of you. That way you are not pretending but just being yourself.

Take Care

Charlene Leona

Link to comment

Lizzy ,,I know exactly what you are talking about . So,,if you

are COMPLETELY sure re your identity , you know beyond all

doubt you ARE a woman Yeh??? ok, after that all you got to

do is to "consciously" STOP talking in a male sounding voice -

the only other way to go is to sound female !! not overnight ,

I would say but with practice its there !!!all we got to do is

be 100% certain ,,,its about your head ,,,think female/talk

female ,,,am I in the ball park hun ????viv :)

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean
Before my orchiectomy my voice was rather deep and gravely and some said I sounded like Marlena Detrick and I had given up on a female voice beyond that. But 13 days after my voice did go through a change. I've been called a liar by allot of MTF's saying that this is is impossible. But since then I have worked hard to find the right voice for me to speak in. Even though I have a convincing female voice I still pay allot of attention to my voice but I don't think I'm pretending in any way shape or form.

Take Care

Charlene Leona

I just want to say that I've talked with Charlene and I can vouch that she has a wonderful female voice...

It's VERY good!

(How about that, Charlene?)

HUGGS!

Donna Jean

Link to comment
Guest Kaitlyn88

My voice sounds too good for me. I'm about 6 feet tall and kind of on the butch side so I'm trying to bring it down to a deeper voice. Also it seems like without all that bass it is hard to yell and speak loudly like to someone far away.

Link to comment
Guest ~Brenda~

Lizzy Dear :)

You clearly have had a major breakthrough the last couple of weeks. You have reached a new and wonderful level in your thinking and self-awareness.

Very good to see. Very good indeed :)

HUGS

Brenda

Link to comment
Guest Elizabeth K
Lizzy ,,I know exactly what you are talking about . So,,if you

are COMPLETELY sure re your identity , you know beyond all

doubt you ARE a woman Yeh??? ok, after that all you got to

do is to "consciously" STOP talking in a male sounding voice -

the only other way to go is to sound female !! not overnight ,

I would say but with practice its there !!!all we got to do is

be 100% certain ,,,its about your head ,,,think female/talk

female ,,,am I in the ball park hun ????viv :)

RIGHT ON THE BUTTON, sweetheart!

To sound like a woman then BE a woman!

[FTM? To sound like a man, BE a man!}

I was working so hard on my voice - which I got to a reasonable place - but I couldn't keep it in a normal converstaion - why? Then I realized I wasn't being what I am - I was trying to have a girl voice. When I realized I am already a girl, the voice became sustainable - duh - because that is what I am! If I am a girl, I don't WANT to sound like a man! So I didn't.

WOW

Lizzy

Link to comment
Guest AshleyRF

practice makes perfect and voice is usually the hardest thing for many of us to change.

It's really amazing how just a little difference in speech patterns can help with this. Choosing words that are more emotional and almost questioning (questioning in that women far more often tend to seek approval from others in everything they do where as men could care less about the approval of others in their intentions.) in nature.

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   7 Members, 0 Anonymous, 152 Guests (See full list)

    • KathyLauren
    • Susie
    • Ladypcnj
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • MaybeRob
    • MAN8791
    • Andrea D
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      769.7k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,077
    • Most Online
      8,356

    gender_equality_nccu
    Newest Member
    gender_equality_nccu
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Alexa Amorosa
      Alexa Amorosa
      (48 years old)
    2. Bluestem
      Bluestem
      (39 years old)
    3. CharlotteSW
      CharlotteSW
      (26 years old)
    4. Daisy91
      Daisy91
    5. jriddle1990
      jriddle1990
      (30 years old)
  • Posts

    • Abigail Genevieve
      You can ask a moderator to make the change for you.
    • missyjo
      started Spiro very recently..told to expect it like Lasix  you'll pee, a lot. have some other complications so we're taking this cautiously . heard something about slightly higher risk for OA too. hugs to all. 
    • MAN8791
      Mine was Hatshepsut, an Egyptian pharaoh who had to carry herself as a male in order to rule. I was completely facinated by her as a student.
    • Willow
      Well it was a good day at work I got everything done I needed to do. My audits came out right and everything.  I had to fix the printer on one pump. It wouldn’t cut the paper and needed two parts replaced.  The District Manager left us Thank you bags,  Murphy Bucks and candy.  We can use Murphy bucks to buy things in the store, or pay for gas.  I guess next week the Area Manager will be around to check on things.  He would be the next layer higher.  Well my eyelids are starting to get heavy, time for a nap.thats the only thing about opening the store it definitely causes me to need a nap.    
    • Vidanjali
      Interesting point. I was raised Catholic and was intensely intrigued by the lives of saints. Similar to your obsession with Mulan, I was particularly drawn to Joan of Arc, a 15th century saint who took on the guise of a man to lead the French army to victory over the English in the Hundred Years' War. Later, she was sold out by the Burgundians to the English who brought multiple charges against her as a heretic, including claiming she could communicate directly with God (which undermined the church's authority), and wearing men's clothes. At one point, while imprisoned, she was made to dress in women's clothes, which she did, but was later found again in men's attire which she said she preferred. She was eventually burnt at the stake at age 19. Rather gruesome tale, but not atypical of the stories of Catholic martyrs. 
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I just read something a FB friend posted about guilt.  I am changing it somewhat for here.   There are things you should not feel guilty about because they are not wrong.  Being transgender is one. People like to send us on guilt-trips about it, intentionally or unintentionally.   There are things you have actual guilt about whether you feel guilty or not.  If you murder someone, you may not feel any guilt.   The FEELING of guilt can be widely separated from objective guilt. All of us need to train ourselves to not feel guilty about things we are not guilty of,, and to feel guilty about the things we are guilty of.  It is not easy.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      Jeans, t-shirt, flip-flops.
    • Vidanjali
      Good news. That just means you're normal!   Understand that thoughts leading to thoughtlessness is a VERY high ideal. Those who aspire to that may spend their entire life working on it and only ever glimpse momentary stillness. In fact, I'm reminded of a story which was relayed to me recently about a yogic master who was interviewed and asked - In deep meditation, how long can you sustain a still mind before another thought creeps in? You may expect the master to reply hours or perhaps even days. His answer - 7 seconds. The thing is, as long as you're operating with a human brain, thoughts will go on. In Bhagavad Gita chapter 6, verse 34, Arjuna (who represents every individual) complains to Lord Krishna (who represents the Higher Self), "The mind is very restless, turbulent, strong and obstinate, O Krishna. It appears to me that it is more difficult to control than the wind." Such is the nature of mind. The difference, though, is in learning gradually to not identify with thought, but rather to become the dispassionate witness of thoughts, like clouds passing in the sky, or often more poignant a simile, like high speed trains rushing by. 
    • Jamey-Heather
      It's very warm here in the Willamette Valley after a couple of weeks of rain. So I thought I'd get springy 🥰🥰🥰
    • Cynthia Slowan
      Hi Ivy!  Thanks so much! 💗Cynthia                      
    • RaineOnYourParade
      As a guy with a mom constantly throwing around "she/her", I feel you.   I think trans people in general hold ourselves to an impossible standard to be more girly or manly. There are some people who look or act a lot like the opposite gender, even if they're completely comfortable in their AGAB. That thought helps comfort me sometimes. If being a man was a set of boxes to check off (beyond the obvious chromosome things), I'm sure there'd be plenty of cis guys that would suddenly find themselves no longer being guys. It can be hard when it feels like evidence is stacked against you, but you don't have to be a certain way to turn into a guy. Some people will make it sound that way, but you're already a guy, regardless of how you look or act. After all, men don't look or act one way.   Moving on from that, your mom'll probably (unfortunately) be an issue until you're able to put some distance between yourself and her. Finding a good group of people that support you and your identity can help some -- even if you can't stop her from misgendering you, the more people that you find that respect you can sometimes make it easier to drown out that voice.   I wish you the best of luck <3
    • RaineOnYourParade
      Dang, this post started a loooooong time ago :o   I'm not the most masculine guy, and I would be way too terrified to talk about any desire to be a boy tbh. Everyone said I was girl, I was told I had girl parts, all that, so I figured there was no other option, even if I wanted to be a boy. So, I basically masked the few remaining "signs" I would have after taking away some stereotypical guy things. I was a bit of a tomboy, but I didn't mind wearing fem clothing, and I was seen as just that -- a bit of a boyish girl.   Though, one internalized sign I did have and never talked about was my obsession with Mulan. A girl who got to go and be a guy. She got to hang out with the guys, eat and sleep with the guys, act like a guy, learn the same things the guys in the movie did. I thought every girl would be jealous of that... apparently not, lol 
    • RaineOnYourParade
      It depends what you consider "rich". "Rich" as in there's plenty going on in there? Yeah, sure. Doesn't mean it's high quality junk. There's a lot of complicated stuff I'm still working on sorting out, so even if I've got a lot in my inner life, it's such a mess that it looks more like a hoarder's den than the nice, temple-like space a "rich inner life" makes me think of.     Then I'm definitely doing something wrong with thinking haha 😅 My brain is physically incapable of not thinking about something. I can focus on one thing if I try really hard or if it's a specific interest of mine, but I have to keep thinking on it, otherwise my brain just starts jumping around. If I leave my brain alone, it sometimes jumps to some stuff that kinda scares me, so I don't think my thoughts will ever go to silence     Great minds think alike, I suppose! :D
    • Ivy
      I will add, Sometimes it's just a look of recognition from a woman, say like in a coffeeshop, store, etc. that helps me feel like I do belong.  I don't get that recognition from men anymore - and don't miss it.
    • Ivy
      I wanted to say this too. One thing that is hard for trans women is not having had the girl's socialization growing up.  A lot of the time we just don't know how to act, and that shows. For myself, sometimes I hold back maybe more than I should out of fear of seeming "creepy." Acceptance varies.  Some women are quite accepting, others less so.  I usually wait to be invited to participate.  I don't want to push myself on anybody.   These days I don't have much interaction with men anyway.  Perhaps my seeing men as "other" gets picked up on by women.  I don't know.  I seem to fall back on "it's complicated."   I think when you understand what women go through in this patriarchal society it helps to understand better.  As trans women, we do get some of this as well, but most of us didn't have to grow up with it. Over time, and even pre-transition, I've developed a very feminist view of our society.  (Also raising 6 daughters helped a bit.)  But that is a whole other subject.
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...