That Was Close!

[Sally]

Well as you all know I am not out to very many people and accepted by virtually none of them (see a connection as to why I haven't come out to very many?)

So in my house I exercise my right to be me, it is spring so I am wearing a favorite of mine - a gauze dress with an embroidered eyelet pattern, literally thousands of tiny little outlined holes in sort of floral pattern - I am very comfortable and at ease on my computer and talking to people on the phone.

My doorbell rings and I start to go answer it - I sat back down and thought about that and realized that it was not a good idea, I will check on the package in a few minutes.

Then just about three minutes ago I was writing a business Email to a member of my rather conservative professional association and just as I was about to hit 'send' I froze!

I had signed it:

Thank you,

Sally

I stopped myself and signed it with my male name.

Do you think that I am trying to come out no matter the consequences or am I just tired?

Love ya,

Sally

No wait, that's OK here!

Sally

[Guest Donna Jean]

Sally.......

You want to come out....admit it!

Even if not conciously, somewhere deep you need to be yourself!

Beware.....it's gonna get you......

I've already sent off a purchase order signed:

Donna Jean

[Guest Cris]

Hi Sally,

Isnt the subconscious grand. I think you are becoming comfortable where you are at and ready to advance to the next step. Just IMO....

Cris

[Guest SusanKG]

I guess it means that Sally is really trying to come out, and is less responsive to stealth protection. Sounds like time for a post-it note on the computer and telephone with the "business" name and info as a crib. That is, until Sally reaches out and crumples up the notes. Then you had better review who's in charge here!

If we don't have Schizophrenia before transition, we have probably developed a serious case of it by the end!

SusanKG

[Sally]

Well I guess that you are both right and in a way I am thinking that I just might be telling them as I leave for my new home - not saying where right now but a few of you know and I think it is probably a done deal - just some paperwork now.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Elizabeth K]

You want to come out....admit it!

Dee Jay - and you DON'T????

Cris knows!

And Susan with the postits ! GRAND IDEA!

OH MY OH MY OH MY

Lizzy

[Guest Cris]

I have too many dang post-it notes around on my desk... I may look down at the wrong one

Cris

[Guest Ashley C.]

The last time I went to pick up my hormone prescription in Boston, I just gave them my male name like always, just because that's how I'm listed in every single computer database the clinic has. I hadn't even noticed that the girl behind the desk had asked me "Can I help you, Miss?"

><

We shared a nice laugh after that, and the label on the side of my pills clearly says (Ashley) . It's so confusing keeping up two identities sometimes that it's nice to be able to laugh about it with people you least expect .

Ash

[Guest NatalieRene]

Thankfully I have my mail program set to append my signature automatically based on which email account I am using. I use Apple Mail but Outlook, other 3rd party email programs, and web mail applications can do it too.

[Guest Donna Jean]

You want to come out....admit it!

Dee Jay - and you DON'T????

Cris knows!

And Susan with the postits ! GRAND IDEA!

OH MY OH MY OH MY

Lizzy

OK!

YOU WIN, LIZZY!

I DO

WANT TO

COME OUT!

ARRRGGGGHHHHHHHHH

*PANT....SNIF....PANT...SNIF'....

dj

[Flint]

I remember a while back I was signing something and I started writing the M for Matt and I realised and had to quickly turn it into another letter before anyone noticed...The bank woman was looking closely at me.....

[Guest ~Brenda~]

You know Sally,

I too have made the same mistake.

I do wonder if we sub-consciously do these kind of things to let people know who we really are

HUGS

Brenda

[Carolyn Marie]

After hundreds, or even thousands of posts, its a wonder most of us don't do it all the time, just out of habit.

It certainly makes for interesting daydreaming as to how we would explain it.

"Well, I, uh, was thinking about my girlfriend, oh, uh, I mean my niece, I, uh, oh never mind"

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Donna Jean]

You know Sally,

I too have made the same mistake.

I do wonder if we sub-consciously do these kind of things to let people know who we really are

HUGS

Brenda

Exactly, Brenda!

I'm sure that if we were to ask a therapist about this, they'd tell us that it's done on a sub-conscious level---INTENTIONALLY!

It always happens to me when I'm in male mode at work! Dee Jay is screamin' to get out!

And I don't blame her one bit!

Donna Jean (Yeah, that's what I meant to type!)

[Guest NatashaJade]

Oh, Sally!

I know how you feel. I have been signing my name as Virginia when I buy things and it has become somewhat natural for me. The other day, though, I was signing some student work and I started writing my big V and fortunately caught myself and was able to course correct fairly quickly. THAT would have been hard to explain. We want all the things we need to be as women to be second nature and when some of them become second nature, we forget that we are not always what we want to be. I am jealous of all the full time folks who just get to be themselves all the time.

We'll get there, though!

luv

Gin