Coming Out At Work As Transgendered (need Help)

[Guest mystiktiger]

hi. i am a FtM transgender. i have not done hormones or surgeries yet, but hope to in the future.

i just got transfered to a new store within my company and would like to come out to my co-workers

and managers has a trans. i have basically always looked and dressed like a guy and am more

comfortable being seen as the guy that i am. no one other than my mother(who also got transfered

with me) knows about this issue.

i have become comfortable anough to be out in the open about it, but i don't know where to start the process or how to even bring it up to my managers. i live in a state where i am protected by law and i can't be fired for being open about this.

okay basically here is what i'm having problems with getting started.

1) how do i approach my managers about this issue.

2) six other co-workers were also transfered from my old store and have known me as very butch and masculine, but never the less still a girl. how do i try to make them understand and get the transsition to go as smotthly as possible?

3) i want to fallow the men's dress code which includes a tie. i still have to legally use the woman's

room even though i will be dressed as a male employee, any sugestions on how to get around this?

(they do have a unisex bathroom in the pharmacy for that department but i'm not suppose to even know it is there, should i ask about using it?

thank you in advance for help any of you can give. it will very much be appreciated

[Guest harvester52]

I would start by pulling your manager aside, and talking to him/her/xir about the situation. Just say, "Hey, just so you know, I'm FTM and prefer to be called he, and by ____ name." And if they ask about what FTM is, or anything, just explain it to them. I've found the best thing to do is to educate.

As for the bathroom thing... start by saying, "I'm curious, what should I do about bathroom situations? Are there are any unisex bathrooms in the store I can use? I don't feel comfortable going into the women's room."

[Guest Snow Angel]

Read it, love it, learn it.

http://www.tsroadmap.com/reality/jobtrans.html

In short, it takes careful planning and notifying all employees in a mature and professional way. About the bathrooms, always a bad situation. Both genders are probably uncomfortable with you using 'their' bathroom, so what the employer will usually do is offer a private restroom for you to use, or utilize a unisex restroom.

[Guest Snow Angel]

Oh, I forgot to mention. The link I posted is geared towards MTFs, but I know you are FTM. Many of the general guidelines will also help you, though. Just reverse everything that says female with male.

[Guest JayJaye]

I will be doing this in several months as well. Fortunately there is no bathroom issue at my job (there are 3 unisex, single stall bathrooms). But as I was reading through my state's laws, supposedly if another employee doesn't want you using 'their' bathroom, then 'they' have to use an alternative. Ie your rights are protected to use the restroom of your gender. I thought that was interesting.

Jay

[Guest CharliTo]

I couldn't tell my boss upfront and settled with sending an email to my boss with a looooooooong explanation, basically my life story.

He just gave me back an email of one sentence, just saying "okay, don't worry, we'll support what you will choose in your lifestyle choices." (meh, I know him mentioning "lifestyle choice" kinda made me go :-\ but I didn't care cuz he was so accepting of it)

I will eventually have to sit down and talk about it though I'm sure, but emailing them still let me explain everything w/o the possibility of me stumbling on my words if I were to do it face-to-face. (which, knowing myself, I probably would have done)