Gynecologist

[Guest Ryles_D]

For awhile now I've been feeling like something might be up down there. On a whim I looked up the symptoms of fibroids and I have a few of those, so even if it's not that- it might be something to worry about and probably isn't normal.

Which means... gynecologist. And likely getting examined internally. So, I've got a few questions-

1. Any advice on broaching this with parents? Dad's open to me being trans and he'd be paying for it. Mom's female but not open to it and doesn't always give hte best medical advice.

2. How do you find a transfriendly doctor? I'm repulsed asexual and trans, each alone would make this bad but together makes it seem like this'll be the most traumatic event of my life. And how do you tell them? Just say "Oh, by the way- I'm a repulsed asexual transguy so if I'm a bit hard to deal with, it's because I don't want anyone near these parts that I shouldn't have"?

3. What should I expect? Is there anything I should ask for, like using a smaller speculum or something?

4. How much would it cost, just to get an examination? Does it vary, is there a range? I'm not sure how dad's insurance works, it seems really freaky.

I dunno, overall I'm not looking forward to having to ask, or the trip itself, or anything. It probably won't be until after Graduation, so I won't have to worry for a few weeks, but still.

[Guest Sophie Jean]

Hi RDeis,

You may be in for a real surprise to find out that in many areas gynecologists are much more understanding of trans than endocrinologists and family doctors. I understand your fear, though. It was too stressful, however, for me to not tell my doctor my concerns about the hormonal side effects his heart and cholesterol medicine had on me--and I needed to tell him that I really didn't mind, as long as the effects were benign. Two and a half weeks ago, I went to a gynecologist to begin my offical HRT regimen. He has several trans patients, including a FTM.

If you have a concern about what's going on down there, you really need to go see the doctor. Have your Dad schedule the appointment for you. You don't have to tell him why yet if you're not ready yet. Just tell him it's a personal issue you're not comfortable discussing. If you are concerned that maybe the Ob/Gyn's may be transphobic (and they shouldn't be--they are professionals), you should be able to get a list of doctors from a gender counselor that can see to your unique needs.

-- Sophie

[Guest Ryles_D]

Heh, I didn't realize MtFs had to go to gynecologists, I guess it makes sense, though. ^^

Thanks for the advice, I'll try that. Meh. I really don't like having to ask to go. It doesn't sound like it'll be fun at all.

[Guest Jack Solomon]

Hi, RDeis, I got examined internally by a ob/gyn last year and she did not have to know I was trans. Unless you're on hormones it's possible she doesn't need to know. Of course, you can tell her if there's a specific reason you want her to know. I went in for an exam because I was having long-term lower stomach area pains and wanted to rule out any problems down there - such as cysts, fibroids, etc.

I had to lie on a medical exam table with my feet in stirrups. No pants or underwear, but I could keep my shirt on. A cloth was respectfully placed on my lower stomach while she kind of visually checked everything out. This exam itself was pretty embarassing and I was extremely nervous, but the doctor was very nice and chose the smallest speculum she could find for me because I'm apparently pretty small down there. I would advise asking for a small speculum if you're not sure.

The most uncomfortable part was probably when she checked for endometriosis. It is probably important to note that most people do not have to go through this part, it's usually considered optional. Checking for endometriosis involved her putting part of her hand up 'both canals' at once and palpitating the walls between them to feel for anything irregular. Yes, that sounds like a horror story, but it was over quickly. I hope I never have to do a full exam ever again, and certainly not that optional part of checking for endometriosis. However, the most unpleasant thing about the exam is that the doctor proclaimed everything to look and feel normal down there. I had been hoping for her to say there was some irregularity, honestly, because I consider those parts to be so bizzare.

I also had a ultrasound scheduled a few weeks later to double-check for anything wrong with the ovaries/uterus area. It was a very simple, non-invasive procedure that I went to a different clinic for. I had to unbutton my pants and they put messy gel on my lower stomach area while a nice nurse ran a device over my skin. The ultrasound was sort of boring but it was a much more tolerable experience. Ironically, it was done on the day after my birthday.

As for the cost: just expect the cost of a general exam. It might even be partially covered by insurance. I'm not sure of the exact cost but I'm thinking $200 range for the exam. Sometimes this may vary by doctor. However, depending on your insurance (and what your insurance covers) the price you pay might be much less.

As for how to talk to the parents: probably approach your dad. Say something like you're concerned that there's an issue and that you might have fibroids so you want a gyn exam just to make sure everything's okay. You probably don't even have to mention it having anything to do with you being trans - just say you're concerned that you may have a legitimate health issue.

Solomon

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

I've had an "examination" too. My experience was pretty much like Solomon's. It wasn't so bad. I mean, it wasn't fun, but at least it was over pretty quickly. If you feel like something isn't right, then you should definitely get it checked out.

Your dad's insurance will probably cover it. You might have to go to your regular doctor first and get a referral, but maybe not.

Hmm...don't know who I'd bring it up with first. With me, it'd probably be my mom because she knows abou that stuff. I think you should talk to whichever parent you feel most comfortable talking to.

[Guest Ryles_D]

Dad's insurance is really weird. It covers the first thousand dollars, no copays or anything, doesn't cover the next few thousand, then pays 50-80% on everything else. And I think we're past the first thousand.

Hi, RDeis, I got examined internally by a ob/gyn last year and she did not have to know I was trans. Unless you're on hormones it's possible she doesn't need to know.

I just want to make it pretty clear that I've got several reasons to not want to be touched down there, and to expect heavy resistance even though I know it's necessary. Up until this year, whenever I had to get shots or blood drawn the doctor ended up spending about 3 minutes trying to calm me down enough to do it. I am not good with the prospect of physical pain, and I figure it's nicer to tell the poor doctor that I'll have all the maturity of a spoiled 2 year old in dealing with this. I'll also mention not to say it won't hurt- because it probably will.

I had to lie on a medical exam table with my feet in stirrups. No pants or underwear, but I could keep my shirt on. A cloth was respectfully placed on my lower stomach while she kind of visually checked everything out. This exam itself was pretty embarassing and I was extremely nervous, but the doctor was very nice and chose the smallest speculum she could find for me because I'm apparently pretty small down there. I would advise asking for a small speculum if you're not sure.

The most uncomfortable part was probably when she checked for endometriosis. It is probably important to note that most people do not have to go through this part, it's usually considered optional. Checking for endometriosis involved her putting part of her hand up 'both canals' at once and palpitating the walls between them to feel for anything irregular. Yes, that sounds like a horror story, but it was over quickly. I hope I never have to do a full exam ever again, and certainly not that optional part of checking for endometriosis. However, the most unpleasant thing about the exam is that the doctor proclaimed everything to look and feel normal down there. I had been hoping for her to say there was some irregularity, honestly, because I consider those parts to be so bizzare.

I also had a ultrasound scheduled a few weeks later to double-check for anything wrong with the ovaries/uterus area. It was a very simple, non-invasive procedure that I went to a different clinic for. I had to unbutton my pants and they put messy gel on my lower stomach area while a nice nurse ran a device over my skin. The ultrasound was sort of boring but it was a much more tolerable experience. Ironically, it was done on the day after my birthday.

Yeesh, part of he rhand. I hope that's just, like, a finger. Because no way can I see all four fitting up there. Either way it doesn't sound fun. It's good about the small speculum, though. I was figuring on asking about that anyways. The ultra sound doesn't sound that bad, since nothing's going into you- but I also heard of stuff where they insert telescopes or whatever into you to look around. Those don't sound so good.

I don't know what to expect. It wouldn't surprise me if it turned out everything is normal, since the general answer for the past two years is "it's just stress", but it also wouldn't surprise me if she took one look and went "Dear God, how can you function with it like this?!" and it turned out to be something serious. I don't know with down there, which is why I've got to get it checked out. But I've had some doctors suggest I have ovarian cysts, and I've got a few symptoms of fibroids, so I'm not all that confident that things are all good.