Ts Custody Issues

[Guest KimberlyF]

I'm wondering if any people who have been through this could share their experiences with the courts over custody issues with small children if they were transitioning while going through a divorce?

I was trying to look this up. All I came up with one case out of Fla where a FTM father was awarded custody. Of course he had to be a pig who started dating his ex's best friend. But then the mother had serious anger issues which is why he got custody. Sounds like the perfect couple to be out there as our spokespeeps.

Kim

[Guest Donna Jean]

.

Honey.....there is a girl on here that is transitioning and got the kids...

I'll try to remember and post you a link if I can find it..It was a while back....ok?

Huggs

Donna Jean

[Guest ChloëC]

ok, transitioning was not part of it, nor were gender issues,in my custody battle (which took several years and two states to complete) but the first thing I always recommend is making sure you get a really good lawyer. Don't go cheap, don't go for somebody because they're supposedly a family friend. And don't be afraid to go a little into debt.

Keep a record of everything, every communication, every bill you've paid. I use this phrase occasionally, but your best chance is to appear that you're on the side of the angels. Oh, and a steady job helps, and I would guess testimony from people who know and will fully support that you're a great parent.

Most of all, do it because you absolutely love your child, and will do anything for its well-being, including giving it up if the court decides. And if that happens, follow every court ordered directive to the 't', be prompt and friendly and courteous during every visitation. Make your support payments, if ordered, exactly on time. And document every moment after that so that if the chance presents itself, you can petition the court for a change of custody.

Good luck, it can be done, courts tend to favor one side, but if you want it bad enough for the child, you can be that one side.

Hugs

Chloë

[Guest chngnwnd]

To the point about getting a good lawyer - it is dead on. My ex was threatening about custody and harassing me because I am trans. Once I got a good lawyer, that all stopped. My kids are with me by choice (their choice), but they are at the age that they get to choose.

hugs

Bobbi

[JJ]

Hi Kim,

There are many variables from place to place but the advise you have been given is spot on no matter where your divorce takes place.

If your children are old enough they also usually have a say. The circumstances that are causing you to contemplate this move will also work in your favor. Sometimes your lawyer can arrange psycological evaluations of those seeking custody which should also work in your favor. You have a lot going for you getting custody.

Hugs

JohnJ