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My Coming Out Day Tale


Guest NatashaJade

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Guest NatashaJade

Okay, so while I did not come out of the closet entirely today, I did make a promise to myself that I would come out to at least one person in my family, that person being my older brother. Because he is a really progressive person, I knew that while he would have concerns, he would be the one person in my family who I could not only be open and honest with, but use as a sounding board for the rest of my family.

Sadly, I couldn't do it in person, so I called and as we began to talk, I told him I had kind of heavy news for him. Strangely, he asked me if I was getting a sex change (he went right to that!). I told him not quite and got about to telling my tale as I have found works for me to tell it over my now last 5 times (Wow! I'm actually becoming an old hand at this...does it get easier? depends who I'm telling). Well, he was blown away by the news and needed a lot of explaining as to what was going on. His primary concern was the state of my family, which in many ways was more important to him that the state of me. I assured him that everything I do, I do with my wife's consent and support and I am always thinking about how this will impact the kids. He kept coming back to that over and again, but at the end of it all, he took the news as a loving brother. No rejections, just concerns.

He also made a strong case for not going any further with my family right now. He is fairly certain my father would outright reject me, or at least be so cruel that it would crush me in a lot of ways (we don't have a lot of faith in the sympathy of our father). He thought that for now, while my other brother might be accepting, it's the kind of news that spreads from that source. He said that as I've told most of the people I loved, until everyone else needs to know, it may be enough.

Okay, fair enough. I agree with him on a lot of points and I love him dearly and I am not sure what telling my parents will accomplish for us in the short run except a lot of uncomfortable anxiety. It's a lot to think about and I will certainly think a lot about it. But really, for today, I have another loving person who knows me for who I am and accepts me for who I am. I think I'm good for the moment.

love to you all

Virginia

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Guest sarah f

I told him I had kind of heavy news for him. Strangely, he asked me if I was getting a sex change (he went right to that!).

Wow, he already knew something was up with you then. I am glad it worked out and he was accepting of you in the end. I know this is a lot to take in for him and he was just concerned for you and your family.

One more down for you and the hardest it appears coming up. I wish you luck with your dad. Maybe he might suprise you and be somewhat ok with this. At least we can hope.

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Guest Donna Jean

.

Gin, Hon....

Your coming out has been nothing short of remarkable so far....

I really don't see that you have a lot more to do...after all, it will probably have a speed bump in there somewhere...

But, in the big picture all will be just be fine..that's the kind of luck you have!

Huggs

Donna Jean

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Guest NatashaJade

But, in the big picture all will be just be fine..that's the kind of luck you have!

But Dee Jay, I don't really have that kind of luck at all. Mine has always been of the hard variety. I've made it through life by the skin of my teeth and Murphy's law has always been my unfortunate companion.

So this is weird. Carolyn said I was on a hot streak, but I've lost a lot of money in Vegas pushing hot streaks too far. Perhaps now is a good time to say "okay, I've done well for now and it is good enough for now."

Strangely I slept last night...I expected to be kept up by the idea of it all.

love

Gin

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Guest sarah f

Gin just like playing black Jack or any other casino game, it is better to stop while you are ahead. I wouldn't say stop for good but for just a while. Ride this high you have for a while because you never know what lies ahead for you.

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Guest NatashaJade

Gin just like playing black Jack or any other casino game, it is better to stop while you are ahead. I wouldn't say stop for good but for just a while. Ride this high you have for a while because you never know what lies ahead for you.

Indeed...strangely, I'm a bit melancholy this morning. It will pass as it always does. But I'll tell you, the last couple of times I went to Vegas, I had a strategy that worked. Whenever I get a hundred dollars ahead, I take that hundred back to my room and put it away, not to be played with anymore. It's safe, but I've left town with more in my pocket than I came with. I think I'm feeling that way right now. Like I have more in my pocket than I dreamed possible and I need to get out of Dodge before I do something stupid.

love

Gin

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Guest KimberlyF

Congrats on your brother. That does seem very perceptive.

This gambling talk confuses me. I was always afraid of blackjack cause I thought I'd take someone's card and they'd yell at me. So I usually stuck to like $10 in the cheap slot machines before going to see a show.

Kim

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  • Forum Moderator

Oh Gin I am so happy for you!

Finding someone in the family you can confide in and who is going to be supportive can make such a difference.

I can see where it may be best just to enjoy the new relationship with your brother for awhile before going further. My limited family know, but sometimes I just burn to tell someone I am with or talking to even though I know it wouldn't be wise. Waiting can be hard but between you and yo bother you'll know when and if the time is right.

Love

JohnJ

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Guest Emily Ray

Gin,

I am so happy that you have found a level of comfort with your brother. I am so very proud of you for taking the chance, but also in wisely selecting who to tell. When the time comes to tell your other brother it may be beneficial to have the other one ther with you showing an example of support and love. But, for now enjoy what you have and you have a lot

Huggs,

Emily

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  • Admin

Congrats on a good, supportive and loving talk with your brother. He seems like a great guy and his advice seems sound. I came out to my brother on the phone too, and it worked out pretty well.

I don't have any advice on what to do next - you know your family best. I imagine parents can be pretty difficult, so a slow approach seems

as good as any.

Lucky streaks always come to an end, but I hope yours doesn't for a long while. Keep rolling those sevens, Gin.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

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