The Promises

[Michelle 2010]

The Promises

(properly known as the "9th Step

Promises")

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

Are these extravagant promises? We think not. They are being fulfilled among us—sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. (Alcoholics Anonymous, pp. 83-84)

I've been lying here sick for a few days spending more time exploring the forum. I read the alcohol posts from 8-24 months ago and wonder if the pain of doing it alone was too much, people excited about having 4 months, then no more posts...

The primary cure for alcoholism, of course, is alcohol, Then it quits working. and we're between a rock and a hard place.

For anyone whose never read them before, notice it sounds like a good life. For me, every time I quit it got worse not better. Alcohol wasn't the problem. The Promises are a glimpse of the future for those that want it badly. I tried to change the people and the world around me most of my life.

My gender issues are the last piece of the puzzle. Today I can explore, trust, not feel shame and its due to the Promises coming true.

I hope all those young people are doing ok. I couldn't stop without help. What I learned was that I can't change the world but I can change how I perceive it. Oh, and if ya got a problem with the "God Thing", don't worry about it. its not a deal killer

I realize that to the other AAs here this may look like promotion not attraction, but I think the promises are very attractive

[JJ]

Moving and important,

Thank you!

Hugs

John

[Carolyn Marie]

Very inspiring words, Michelle.

Yes, we all wonder about the people who disappear. All we can do is wish them well, and hope they are all right.

They are beyond our control and our hugs, but as long as we remember them they won't be completely gone.

All the best to you in your efforts to survive and thrive without alcohol.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Michelle 2010]

Very inspiring words, Michelle.

Yes, we all wonder about the people who disappear. All we can do is wish them well, and hope they are all right.

They are beyond our control and our hugs, but as long as we remember them they won't be completely gone.

All the best to you in your efforts to survive and thrive without alcohol.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

Thanks Carolyn Marie. Life is pretty good. I've got a few years of sobriety and have no urges to drink. The female in me needs to find balance. It doesn't have to happen today. Or tomorrow. The disease of addiction likes to deal in absolutes, good/bad, black/white, happy/sad. In recovery we learn that uncertainty is not always the enemy, and we don't need to act in haste since how we perceive things may not always be right.

Today I have more peace in my life than I've ever had before. Now this female part of me... I guess I have to be patient. I'm drawn like a moth to the flame. In twelve step programs it always comes down to helping others. Hopefully the answers will come if I listen.

Huggs

Michelle

[Michelle 2010]

Well, its Independence Day, July 4th 2012, and alot has happened since I posted this topic. I still wonder about those who posted here needing help with alcoholism. I hope they are sober and happy. Since this topic was posted, I got involved in a TG-AA email group, which evolved to include a weekly Skype AA meeting. It continues today and is a great way to connect with trans alcoholics who feel they can't quite share openly and honestly in live meetings with people that truly understand...

In the winter of 2010-2011 a member of the email group said, "If you are only "out" online, you're still in the closet...." While I was attending the TG support group, at the time of this original posting I had only told my sponsor about being TG, so the closet comment resonated with me. I knew that I had to begin bringing my two worlds together...

Fast forward to today. I am planning my biggest party yet for tg and aa friends this saturday. This morning I finished a fourth step with a sponsee and as we did the fear and sex inventory, it was time for me to share my lifelong fears of discovery of being transgendered and dressing in women's clothes....

In recovery we can not only learn to not use drugs and alcohol, we have the opportunity to become the person we were meant to be, to be truly reborn as a healthy person.

Today I am not ashamed of who i am, and I can share my experience, strength and Hope with others, illustrating how the 12 steps changed me... Changed me from a person who had a "secret", into a person who can share how living a 12 step life and getting in touch with a higher power turned that shameful weakness into a source of strength and an example of living in the sunlight of the spirit.

Every single person I have shared my trans experience with in AA has the utmost respect for the journey, the risks taken, and the honesty that has resulted. Including the sponsee with six months sobriety. If he hadn't been able to handle it, it would of been ok because I don't live in fear and darkness anymore.

The purpose of resurrecting this thread, of bumping it back up to the top, is to put it out there to those who read, but are fearful of what others may think, or fearful of accepting their true selves. There is a solution to what may seem like a trap with no way out; to drinking in the closet and living in the shadows.

Independence Day can begin any day. What an irony that my fiercely valued independence was my greatest roadblock. By becoming dependent on a new way of living I have achieved an independence I could only have dreamed of having.

Love

Michelle

[Guest rita63]

Michelle you are inspiring in your' confidence and and presence.

While you are today celebrating your revolution, this Canuck is celebrating 11 months of sobriety. I have started to lesrn to trust in my higher power and to listen and learn from those with more knowledge of the 12 steps. I am learning this from you and Vicky and Charlie who help to keep me sober and open to learning and growing.

I am finding out who rita is and who I am and letting me become that person and doing it without fear but with pride.

Thanks for being here.

hugs rita