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I just joined this forum. Have read and researched many and this is one of two I chose to join. Many thanks to Stu for responses to my questions. I was impressed with the information and the diversity of experiences. So far I have only read topics in the FTM forum. And probably will limit my participation there. Thanks to all who opened up and shared.

I am 46 and prefer the term transman or man. Happy New Year to all.

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Welcome to Laura's Playground Chiv :)

I hope you enjoy it here. There are a lot of friendly members.

I'd like you to read the Terms and Conditions at the top of the page. This site is PG-13.

Jenny

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  • Admin

Welcome to the Playground, Chiv. I'm glad you decided to join.

I've got the Welcome Snack Cart here and have some pizza and hot cocoa all ready for you. :)

I know your interest is largely in the FtM forum, but you are welcome to post in any. The Resource Pages are also excellent, and if

you've talked to Stu, you must already have been to the Chat Rooms. Good for you!

I look forward to hearing from you in the coming weeks.

Carolyn Marie

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Hello Chiv,

Welcome to the forums, I am so glad that you have decided to join us and I will be more than glad to address you as sir or man as that is who you truly are.

We sometimes wait a long time to admit to ourselves who we are and what we must do but once started it is a wonderful feeling to just be you.

I'll see you in the forums because I read and participate just about everywhere.

Have a wonderful New Year.

Love ya,

Sally

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Guest ~Brenda~

Hi Chiv :)

It is very good to see that you have decided to join us here at Laura's.

I am very glad to see that you have taken joining Laura's seriously and have read the Terms and Conditions.

Laura's is all about loving support.

You are going to be just fine here :)

Love

Brenda

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Thanks for the welcome Jenny, Carolyn Marie, Sally and Brenda. I am still learning and discovering the site. Carolyn Marie, pizza and hot cocoa are among my favorite comfort snacks.

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Guest sarah f

Welcome to Laura's Chiv. I am glad you found the site and decided to join.

If you have any questions just ask and we will try to help. I look forward to seeing more from you.

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Guest KellyKat

Welcome Chiv!!

I have been gone from the site awhile, but Laura's truly feels like home!

It's a wonderful place to make new friends and be yourself!

Luv Kat :)

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  • Forum Moderator

Hi Chiv!

Welcome to Laura's! It's great to see a new transman here a little closer in age to myself.

Please feel free to post as much as you want in any forum whether asking questions, expressing opinions or sharing experiences. There are many issues that affect us all posted in all of the other forums. When I joined I found it too much to try to go through all the forums all the time and look for new posts but then I found the new content button and check there first all the time now. We really do welcome people posting in any forum because our life experiences have given us insights we frequently share and because people become family and it's nice to see what they are posting.

I enjoyed your introduction and look forward to your posts!

John

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Hi Chiv,

Welcome to Laura's! Nice to have you join up with us. Hope you will continue to post as you are comfortable in doing so. With just five posts you become eligible to make use of the Personal Messenger (PM) feature found here.

Hugs,

Opal

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Great to meet you Sarah, Kat and Opal. I might just have to venture in other forums. Women have always been a great support in my life. 20 years ago when I lived in the east coast, it was women that recognized the true me and showed me what family really meant . I admire you all for you paved the way for us guys.

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Hi John,

Finally to meet someone my age! Also we share the same first name. I chose Chiv as my last name because that was the name I started my transition with(and it's a shorter from of chivalrous). I tend to research and read and try and find answers but I will take all of you up on your help and will certainly have questions.

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Guest miss kindheart

Hi Chiv,

<<< curtsey >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules. :)

We have FTM meetings -Mon & Fri 8pm est, and you are welcome to attend.

We all look forward to seeing you.

:wub: vanna

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vanna,

Thanks for the welcome and the invite to chat. For now, I am just sticking with the forums and reading and learning how to navigate this site. I check the forums often; it's like having a favorite treat. The support and love that emanates from so many people here and seeing the inner strength has been very touching.

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Guest Dawn D.

Hey, I think I know this guy, lol! Look out, everyone. He's a smooth talker, lol! How ya doin' John! Good to see you here. I haven't posted much here yet. Though, it seems like a pretty nice place! Lot's of good information and nice people!

Talk soon,

Dawn

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LOL hi Dawn. Yes, I really like this site and the people and most of all, they work hard to keep it drama free, which I like. It's good to see you here as well. Smooth talker aye, is that code for charming, handsome and passionate activist? :D

There is really great information here. I keep discovering new things to read.

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  • Who's Online   7 Members, 0 Anonymous, 57 Guests (See full list)

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    • Lydia_R
      I'm a tracker and I've paid for 100% of my transition costs out of pocket.  Counseling was a huge, huge part of my transition and well worth my money.  Not to be uppity about all of this.  I'm just sharing information I have because I have it and it may be useful for others.  Here is my analysis of my spending on transition over the last 2.5 years:   Medical Doctors and Blood Draws: $2,397 Counseling: $3,800 Medications (brand name): $2,702.85 Medications (generic): $485.39 Total: $9,385.24   I picked up on the internet early in transition that transition is a consumer activity.  I tend to agree with that.   This year (Jan - May 18th, 2024), I've spent: Medical Doctors: $102 Medications: $241.52 Total: $343.52   So I'm on a much more sustainable path with it.  I'm pretty happy with where I am with it, although I do still desire surgery and am nervous about how that will all unfold.  But my doctors have me on this steady state thing.  I could seek out other medications, but what I'm doing is good enough.  Oh, I'm missing something....  I did a bunch of electrolysis that didn't appear to have any effect.  I've always enjoyed shaving and I use pink shaving cream now (I've got some lipstick blond in me).  It's good enough.  Not sure if I'll do electro or laser in the future.  The need to shave my body has become less and less.  Before HRT, I was shaving my body weekly or even every 5 days.  Now it is more like 2-3 weeks.  Everyone's body hair is different.  My beard is very coarse and stiff while my body hair has been somewhat minimal and light.  It's nice to have smooth legs and not have to shave as much.   Counseling was $200/session.  I tried one or two counselors before I found one who resonated with where I really was.  When I was prescribed HRT, I didn't fill the prescription until 4 months later.  I had to take some time to decide that I really wanted to take on that lifetime financial commitment.  And of course the possibly negative health consequences too, but I think I was actually thinking more about the finances of it all.  Maybe 51%.   I did a lot of work to revitalize my career before jumping into medical transition.  I started counseling 3 months before I got the best paying job of my life.  The pressure of wanting to transition was so great that I couldn't wait any longer.  She was coming out.  Even though I had very little money, I splurged on some nice dresses and a full length mirror and then started counseling.  Sometimes you just have to move forward and hope for the best.  Other times it is better to wait and do some hard work.  The grace of it all..
    • Ivy
      And when the pressure is released it sucks in heat.  I had a regulator leaking and it was covered with ice.  It's how a heat pump works as well.   Why do they always pick names like this?  It's like the exact opposite of what it really is. I hate politics so much.  But I still have to follow it.
    • Lydia_R
      Wonderful!  This reminds me of a discussion I had with my brother a decade ago.  I said that things expand when they get hotter.  He said, no, they expand when they get colder.  And I had to think about that for a while.  The weird thing is that H20 is special in that when it reaches freezing, it expands.   The pressure makes the cold and then we see the condensation.
    • KatieSC
      I used to have a really good therapist, however, she does not accept health insurance reimbursement fees as they are too low. I had to pay 130 per session. When she decided to jack the rates to 185 per hour, I cut bait. Without a doubt, counseling is very helpful. What concerns me greatly is that we are a vulnerable population. Unfortunately, we can easily be targeted for some pretty high fees. How many of us have been in the situation where our healthcare provider, surgeons, or counselors, have required cash payments? We get jammed as well by the health insurance companies as they often will not pay for items that could be essential to our well-being. It is my contention that our chances of being targeted for violence, death, or harassment, go up when we cannot easily blend in with the female population.    For those of us that are MTF, some of us are blessed with more feminine features, and many of us are not. We get the whammy of a larger skeleton, bigger hands, bigger feet, a beard, a deep voice, and masculine face. It takes a lot for some of us to be able to blend in. My belief is that the better we blend in, the better chance we have of not being targeted. In this, electrolysis, facial feminizing/gender affirming facial surgery, voice/speech therapy with voice feminization/gender affirming voice surgery, and body contouring are all potentially lifesaving. Unfortunately, many of the insurance companies deem the procedures as cosmetic, and yet there is no cosmetic that fixes all of these issues.    If you pay your money, you can get anything you want in this world. The sad reality is that for us, many of these procedures would enhance our lives tremendously, yet we face ongoing battles with our very existence. Yeah, an empathetic therapist helps, but is it just the concept of reasonable empathy at a reasonable cost? When my therapist jacked her rates to 185 per hour, I said enough is enough. Your mileage may vary.
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      I don't think the temperature matters as much.  Think about how gases like CO2 are stored in cylinders, and they are basically the same in summer or winter.  Any gas becomes liquid under enough pressure.  What does matter is the strength of the pressure vessel.  If exposed to excess external heat, pressure increases and can burst a tank or a pipe.  Household propane tanks are often painted white or silver and have safety release valves, because sunlight can heat a tank enough to cause a significant increase in internal pressure, even though the contents remain liquid. 
    • awkward-yet-sweet
      It has been a long week, and I think this weekend is going to be pretty busy.  The high school is having their graduation later today.  Although we don't have any grads in our family this year, my husband is going because he's involved with the school.  And tonight there's the torchlight ceremony for the county cadets who are finishing their program, and the reading of assignments for the new seniors.  One of my stepkids will be a senior this year.  She's talented, and will be assigned a squad leader position.  My husband is really proud of her, and she's well-liked by her peers even though she's very quiet and serious.    I might get to go on a trip to Texas this week.  The storms that hit Houston caused a lot of electrical damage, so no doubt the utilities in that area will be ordering stuff from my husband's company.  When the big hurricane hit Florida in 2022, we made several trips there with badly-needed equipment, and the entire transportation department was involved in the first convoy.  When he travels, I usually want to go along, since 1-on-1 time is kind of rare for us. 
    • Mmindy
    • Lydia_R
      Maybe surface tension?   I was in a political debate yesterday and it got way too focused on social stuff and I just had to steer the conversation back to how natural gas transitions to a liquid under pressure.  One of the people I was debating had a career working in that field and it was a good opportunity to expose stuff like that.  He mentioned that it isn't just pressure, it is temperature too.  So then I mentioned how the lines are running underground and asked how that played a role in it.  He came back saying that natural gas is a liquid under pressure.  I guess I didn't get a straight answer on that, but it did move my thinking one step down the road.  Perhaps I should have been more direct with him and asked him at what temperature and pressure.  Is there a chart?   I feel people would be better off if they paid more attention to the objects in their environment instead of focusing on some of the things that we hear so much of in the news.  People are pretty clueless as to how much trigonometry plays a role in so many things in our society.  Even land surveyors don't really use it anymore because programmers locked it away in a function.  Much like how cascading style sheets (CSS) is a wrapper for math.  I wonder what former president Trump thinks about all of that?  He must have some knowledge of how his buildings are constructed, right?  There certainly is a part of me that thinks he is just putting on a show about all of this.  Perhaps I'm wrong though.  All kinds of people in the world.
    • Jani
      Me as well.  I can use my left hand for many tasks though.
    • Jani
      Hello Jennifer and welcome back.  I find New England to be a great place to live.  I have a number of acquaintances and friends in Maine and I love the state.  It seems you are doing well.     Hugs,  Jani
    • MirandaB
      Oh, my "maybe this person is an egg" story is the (male presenting) piercing person and I discussed body hair removal methods, he says he doesn't want any hair except on his head, which is what I said during a couple hair removal sessions before and just after the egg cracked.     
    • Karen Carey
      I, too, am lucky.  Here in the UK I have a great therapist, a fully supportive GP, and a psychiatrist and endo who look after me and my needs.  I found the therapist on Psychology Today.
    • Lydia_R
      Over the last few years of being on this site and going through medical transition, I've come to own the M->F identification.  Funny, I made a typo of M->T.  It is a curiosity if I'll ever put Gender: Female on this site.  It is my intention to be there someday.   Right now, because of career stuff and a high stress event with an electric hair clipper last fall, I'm feeling much more masculine than I would like.  I think that once I make some decent headway with my third career, I'll settle into a more feminine feeling.   I never really considered gender very much.  I certainly always used a feminine appearance as my presentation goal. I think that when I was young, I briefly had the idea of transitioning, but I convinced myself quickly that medical transition would be a bad outcome, so I put all those feelings and ideas in the closet for decades.  I'm still very apprehensive about medical transition.  I've always taken health to be a high priority for me.  I wrote a book last December about my fears of it all and my conclusion ultimately is that sometimes there is more to life than being a pillar of health.  It's important to take some chances if that is where your heart takes you.
    • Lydia_R
    • Lydia_R
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