Why Do I Suddenly Feel Terrible About Dressing?

[Guest Emily H]

I come home today and nearly have to force myself to dress, and I feel moody and uncomfortable now...

But the thing is, all day I have been adoring female bodies and wishing a had one, and wanting to try on the styles that I saw, etc.

Now, being dressed isn't doing anything for me. But, I do not at all want to take off my clothes and put on male clothes either.

So, I'm upset and moody, about dressing specifically, but I have no clue why. I feel like a man in women's clothing. I don't feel feminine or female in any way. But, I want to. the idea, of undressing now and putting on my male clothes and being male again, sounds horrible.

I'm wondering if anybody else has experienced this, or has any idea what's making me feel so bad?

[JJ]

Most of us have those times I think. Our old lives push back. And yet we cannot go back. The wanting, the need to change as well as the realization of how much there is to do or how far we have to go just overpowers us sometimes I think.

In fact it often seems when I derive least satisfaction from my new appearance is when I am most fiercely wanting to be male bodied. When I ask myself if this is really what I want to do the answer comes back a resounding YES. I just get tired of having it dominate my life, and long for the day I can take it for granted and just go about my life as me.

I don't know if this is what is happening for you but that is my experience.

Hugs

John

[Guest Blindheart]

If you have to force yourself to do something, i doubt you will ever enjoy it.

What did you put on you feel so uncomfortable in? pretty skirts and dresses? PJ's? Maybe you need some new clothes to feel better. I look in my closet and hate almost everything i see, but what i like and what i hate seem to change from day to day or week to week, and its all the same stuff.

Depending on what you were wearing, maybe try changing into something more girly and frilly or maybe just more plain and practical. Sometimes what we think we want and what we actually need are completely separate. If all else fails, get as undressed as you are comfortable with, and just wear a bathrobe the rest of the day.

[Guest Emily H]

If you have to force yourself to do something, i doubt you will ever enjoy it.

What did you put on you feel so uncomfortable in? pretty skirts and dresses? PJ's? Maybe you need some new clothes to feel better. I look in my closet and hate almost everything i see, but what i like and what i hate seem to change from day to day or week to week, and its all the same stuff.

Depending on what you were wearing, maybe try changing into something more girly and frilly or maybe just more plain and practical. Sometimes what we think we want and what we actually need are completely separate. If all else fails, get as undressed as you are comfortable with, and just wear a bathrobe the rest of the day.

I just put on jeans and a shirt. I am usually more comfortable in a skirt or dress. It's kind of weird, so many natal girls hate wearing skirts and dresses, at least many that I know.

[Carolyn Marie]

Emily, whatever the cause, I think its just a temporary feeling. Sometimes we get moody without any apparent reason. We just are.

Don't over think it, hon. Relax, and realize that it will pass and you will return to feeling good about being yourself. If you are a woman, then being moody and emotional is part of your nature. You don't necessarily require hormones to feel that way, either.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest ChloëC]

Hi Emily,

Don't worry too much about it. Some days are diamond, some are stone. Especially for us cross-dressers where we value the time we do have and any emotions less than being ecstatic can be considered a downer. As Flo says 'Happens to me all the time'. Well, not all the time, but I have forced myself a little at times, because I understand the next time might not be tomorrow or even a week from tomorrow. And more often than not, I do enjoy it once dressed.

Humans are funny like that with emotions that run the gamut. I'm sure there are natal women that sometimes don't even want to get out of bed in the morning, and here, we're complaining about not being beside ourselves to put on a dress. But regardless, I still savor the times I can.

Hugz

Chloë

[Guest Deandra]

I really wish i could just get past the mood swings myself, but like carolyn said maybe it's just our nature.

[Guest Elizabeth K]

I feel like a man in women's clothing.

GRIN

Happened to me all the time as a crossdresser. HATED getting no pleasure out of it! The only explanation I ever figured out was the 'thrill' was gone for some specific reason, probably because I FELT like a man in a dress - and I DIDN'T WANT THAT!

Believe it or not, what helped was to tone it down - just be myself with a few things going on - like in jeans and a teeshirt, athletic shoes - kinda gender neutral - but with my earrings in. Kinda like a chick on her day off - so much more real. That helped me so much.

Perhaps you just want it too much? Try 'laughing' at crossdressing, and become 'feminine' but not over the top, sometimes. Cool way to be.

Lizzy

[Guest Penelope]

Emily, I believe we all feel dissatisfaction at times.

I know that time is sometimes short and dressing has to be fitted into a schedule. This can definitely rob it of it's magic. I sometimes have bad wig days or just see the man in the mirror.

The best thing to do is to leave it alone for a while and go and do something else that really absorbs your attention.

All the best,

Penny

[Cyndee]

Some days are definitely better than others Emily, and tomorrow my hope is for you the fog clears a bit and you can go back to not worrying too much about dressing one way of the other. I hope you find peace and comfort in just being you girl.

Some recent experiences of mine,

A couple of days ago I looked in the mirror and I saw a girl trying to look like a guy (for my wife). I saw some people at a flee market I have known for 10 or more years last weekend, however had not seen for a year or so and they did not recognize me at all, I had to repeat my guy name to them, I could see the expression on their face (I look a girl), but I just told them I had lost weight ;-). I went out shopping this past weekend in girl jeans (girl belt), pony tail, purple flannel, it felt so good to just cruise the racks. Shopping definitely lifts my mood. I was just another girl at JC Penny (I love that store). The checker women were just so friendly as I made my purchases, I loved it. I was treated just like another lady shopper, awesome !

John's post above is so right on, like I could not agree with him more. The darkest hour is always just before the dawn !

Hugs

Cindy -

[Guest Emily H]

Thank you all for your support, it was great reading all of your posts.

And I thinks its worth mentioning, I didn't feel good about anything for a while there...I felt utterly terrible, about everything. Some things I feel overwhelmed by, some things I just felt pressured by, lots not relating to my gender at all. I stayed in my room for nearly two and half hours, just, feeling bad, and stuck in it because I was trying to do math homework that I just could not figure out, ever thing I tried was a dead end...

Eventually I got over it and had an alright night. And now I'm home from school because my shoulder hurts terribly, I was barely able to move it this morning. Hopefully I'll feel better tomorrow.

[Guest indiefem]

I've been there too, where it all just feels out of sorts. Makes all the things you really enjoy not seem right. Glad that is working itself out, you deserve to be happy in all that you do!

Right after I opened up to my wife I felt like not dressing up at all. Weird how that was, but it just didn't feel the same at all! I am feeling very feminine lately and really need to talk to her about it though, so I think it was just a massive shock I was going through.

Get that shoulder feeling better dear! Physical pain can suck every bit as bad as mental pain!