Wife Supports Me!

[Guest Katie_in_AK]

Hi all,

I'm new here, but have browsed around from time to time. I'm at 35 year old CD, and have been so, I truely believe, my whole life as far back as I can remember. Like most, I'm at "home" when I'm wearing what feels "natural" to me. Yes perhaps it IS the 2nd self, but Kate is a big part...HALF of me, and FINALLY after all these years, she can be "free" with the one I love, my wife. Recently I wrote her a LONG letter (probably very familiar to most here), and poured out all my heart and all my secrets. I could not STAND IT anymore. Hiding is like cancer that eats you up until DEATH appears as a release. Added to the stresses of work and regular home life and finances, hiding Kate was just TOO HARD to do anymore. I've been married almost 13 years and about 8 years ago I had expressed myself to her more visually, and dressed often in lingerie at night. She even helped my buy some clothes, but looking back, I can see it was all too hard, she was just "going through the motions", not the "emotions", and those after a few months were bad emotions and it caused a lot of friction and eventually I purged most everything tearfully, of course hoping "i'm done" and that's that. We know that we cannot live as half of who we are, but I tried. That was shortly after our son was born. Now, 8 years later... after a few "secret" binge/purge sessions over the years, well hidden of course, it came to a head. I started to buy again (only undergarments well hidden). Over the past 8 years, my wife has worked with many sexually unique people. I've watched this and watched HER grow in realizing that we are PEOPLE, not FREAKS! I would randomly engage her about the one co-worker who had went en femme to a club and she knew where I was heading, and seemed a bit more mild on the subject. I expressed how awesome it was to be so brave, and I admired his will to be who he is. That was almost a year or so ago. Well, 2 days ago, I wrote "the letter". I think most of us have done this before. I emailed it to her and after she returned from a business trip (I had told her I emailed her an important email) after returning late that night, I could here her downstairs open and turn on her laptop and I laid there in bed, listening, praying, thinking, praying, hoping she would tolerate me at the MINIMUM. I knew she wouldn't freak out or leave me, she already knew my "other half" 8 years ago...but I was HOPING for more than tolerance. I was hoping for SUPPORT, and a "girlfriend" from my wife. Well a loooong time went buy and she came up the stairs to the bedroom to shower and I said hi, and then after as she lay there in bed afterwards, I slowly started making small talk and engaged the subject. The letter was VERY long, and NOTHING was held back. I could no longer hold ANYTHING back. ALL MUST BE OPEN AND HONEST. We talked until 4:30am, me crying through a lot of it. To pour your heart out to a listening, not judging spouse, was an answered prayer. Finally after 8 years since she "found out", she came to accept that I can NOT hide anymore, I loved her too much. She assumed of course that way back when I honestly said "i'm done" thinking I WAS, that it had ended back then. We know and I now do to, that we cannot live half a life. She didn't have a lot to say, and I was very patient in letting her know I didn't want anything FROM her, only that I couldn't hide anymore, who I was, my TRUE self, all of me. Although she doesn't really like the 2nd self being named Kate, I explained that it will be our code-word for my other half. If either one of us mention it, we understand what we're talking about. Well, later the next day, after I was at work (I'm a garage mechanic (lovely huh?)) She stopped by and we talked some more and I was just forcing my plain words out. Saying "my bras" and "these nylons" to my wife that I could never do that before, but NOW, yes, NOW, I could! It was a bit hard to DO and say the things I prayed and wished for all these years. She started to tear up and said "come outside". I was very supportive of her as she too had something very sad to share. She said that it would hurt me very deeply (I thought she may want to leave me). In the parking lot, she shared with me how she had had a one time "event" with a co-worker and that it would never happen again. I was not hurt at all in fact. She said it was 2.5 years ago actually, and I assured her that this release for her to get this guilt off her shoulders made me sad for HER. I was the one supporting HER and telling her that I will never be angry, she's my best friend, the only one on the whole planet that knows WHO I AM REALLY! I said that from these ashes, we can grow as the best friends two spouses could ever be. We accept eachother as WHO WE ARE, not labeled, not judged, but two people (yes married), but two human people who are just that, human. I told her it's now time to play and enjoy each other, both sexually and as FRIENDS, not spouses (yes, sometimes these are two different things!) So after some tears, and hugs, she left and I went back into work. A few hours later she had went to the store and picked out 4 pretty bras. She said to pick which two I liked best, and we'd try them on at home. The heavens opened! Later after work we met at a "special store" that has what seems to be an acre of toys, "tools", and lingerie. I'd been in the store before and was very comfortable, she wasn't but the friendly staff had made it as easy as possible for her to enjoy browsing. $250 later, we had some new toys, tools, and wonderful new pieces for me! An adorable corset with purple frilly trim and garter straps that hooked to my new white opaque stockings with cute little white bows at the tops. After I made a wonderful (healthy and organic) dinner for the three of us, we put our son to bed, and went upstairs. She had showered and shaved during dinner prep, so now it was my turn. I've been shaved from waist to my cute sparkly blue toenails for sometime now, but when I told her I left my chest hair for her, she said "actually I prefer bare chest". YES!! And off it came, now smooth from eyebrows to tippy toes, I showered, shaved, and "prepared" for a wonderful night of role reversal! She had more suprises! She had a small pile of cosmetics on the counter, and not only explained how to apply them, but she did so on me! (she normally is a tom boy w/ few cosmetics, rarely wears make up, and DOES NOT own a dress) Do you see how "opposites" attract. Me being deeply feminine and her the opposite. Well after she applied my make up, she helped me dress. She attached all the clasps of my new lingerie behind my back, and my garter straps to my cute bowed stockings. Was I in for a treat! The next two hours were a lifetime of fantasy fullfilled! She agreed that it was fun and very enjoyable. The next morning as I dressed for work, I could just stand there and put on my bra and thigh-highs and talk like we were girl friends, and discuss how pretty Miss Catherine Middletons wedding dress was. No judgements, no hate, no hiding or anger. All gone, all out in the open. I texted her this morning while she was at fire fighter training, that maybe after work we could meet and go shopping for a little "outer wear" as I have only "under" wear. I know that it will be a GREAT shopping trip where I can actually browse w/ my wife and it NOT look suspicious! .... Today I've started a new life as my WHOLE SELF. Kate, now a bigger part of that, no longer oppressed at home. *sigh* yes, still by society, but where it counts, I found love. I love you Candy. You're the best wife ever!

~~Kate

[Guest ChloëC]

Hi Kate,

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

That certainly is a very informative introduction post. And a lot to read. Please understand that we are a moderated site and it takes a few minutes for your posts to be seen, read, and approved. Also, if you haven't already done so (which you may have, so good for you!), please take a moment and look over the Terms and Conditions so you'll have an understanding of how we are here.

A very nice note to your spouse, it's great to have an understanding one. I hope you two will continue having a shared relationship.

Hugz

Chloë

[Guest Katie_in_AK]

Sweet! Thanks.

[Guest miss kindheart]

Hi Kate,

<<<< hug >>>>

The snow is melting fast now

I loved your story

I know how hard it is to come out to family

It sounds like you have a loving relationship with your wife

Honesty will pull you closer than you ever dreamed possible

be good

vanna

[Guest Katie_in_AK]

Sure is warming up Vanna! Hey I see you PM'd me I think, but I don't have enough posts to recieve them yet. So after a few posts I'll see it.

As far as the shopping went, town has not that great a selection, but we came home with a few bags full to play with! Finally! Outer wear that's my OWN!

[Guest Missy1900]

Loved your post

[Guest Katie_in_AK]

Missy, one day it will be your turn. DON'T rush it. It will come about on it's own time. My wife and I in the last 4 days, are closer than we've ever been in 13+ years. She took some photos for me, we looked at make-up "how-to's" on Youtube, and even a few funny other videos on the net about CD's. I think she learned she has MORE husband than she ever thought, and in this case, MORE is better. I should say I'm WHOLE, and she has grown. Together now we moved forward hand in hand. No more hiding.

[Guest DanielleD]

Missy, one day it will be your turn. DON'T rush it. It will come about on it's own time. My wife and I in the last 4 days, are closer than we've ever been in 13+ years. She took some photos for me, we looked at make-up "how-to's" on Youtube, and even a few funny other videos on the net about CD's. I think she learned she has MORE husband than she ever thought, and in this case, MORE is better. I should say I'm WHOLE, and she has grown. Together now we moved forward hand in hand. No more hiding.

Katie, your story made me start to tear up. I am so happy for you. I hope you guys continue to grow closer

Have a Fabulous Day!

Danielle

[Guest kimberly c]

Hi Katie, Its great that your wife now supports you and lets you be your true self.I have been crossdressing many years with the support of

my wife, its part of me and always will be.

Love Kim

[Sally]

Hey Katie,

That is just fantastic - acceptance from your wife is such a great thing and is somewhat rare, you have a very special woman and you should always remember that and treat her that way.

Love ya,

Sally

[Guest Elizabeth K]

Sure is warming up Vanna! Hey I see you PM'd me I think, but I don't have enough posts to recieve them yet. So after a few posts I'll see it.

As far as the shopping went, town has not that great a selection, but we came home with a few bags full to play with! Finally! Outer wear that's my OWN!

Grin

All you need is 5 or more posts to start PMing.

Lizzy

[Guest melissacd65]

Hey my wife also accepts melissa,but with guideline which i can accept,but also requests her man time with me.

I luv her more each day,and really enjoy the help and training she has taught me.

[Guest Katie_in_AK]

Sally I treat my wife REALLY good now. We talk about EVERYTHING. We love each other very much. I can dress however and show off the new low-rise jeans I got on clearance and she's thinks that's pretty cool. She tells me when she wants a "man" in the house, and I respect that.

[Guest melansia]

I loved your post!! It took so much courage for you to tell your wife this.. I can only imagine how hard. I wish you and your wife the best of luck with your newly expressed side!

[Guest Katie_in_AK]

Thanks! We sure are having a great time!

[Guest Marie Sue]

your all very lucky to have a wife and girlfriend in 1

H & K

Marie Sue

[Guest Missy1900]

Hi Katie-That is a great story, but it will never happen to me.I will just have to enjoy the posts wishing for the impossible.

[Guest JaniceW]

... but it will never happen to me.I will just have to enjoy the posts wishing for the impossible.

Missy,

It may or may not happen for you, depends on whether or not you WANT it to happen for you and how hard you are willing to work for it.

The quote in my signature should be interesting to you.

BTW, I have a cousin who is named Missy, well her name is actually Maureen but we all call her Missy.

[Guest Katie_in_AK]

Well it's been 8 years since first revealing Katie to my wife and that didn't go well. After a purge (or two in secret) we both thought Katie was gone for good. No such thing. Well like I said, 8 years later, I'm sitting here en femme with my wife watching Star Wars and we love each other very much. Did I change, no, it was her that I had to be patient to allow a re-revealing, and the long letter I said in post #1. Only by my wife having worked with sexually unique people, did I know she was ready for Katie again. As far as our 8 year old, he doesn't seem to notice my "size B's", or light makeup. Nothing trashy, just evening comfort. No skirts in the closet yet, (gotta watch the budget you know!) Fred Meyer is having huge clearance sales! I WANT TO FILL A SHOPPING CART! But have to wait. I told my wife she and I are the envy of MANY girls on here who pray daily for a wife like mine. Trust me...I prayed for the last 25 years! But now she buys me clothes and helps with make-up. Yeah, I'm living my dreams for sure. (at least at home)

Kisses,

~~Katie