Jump to content
  • Welcome to the TransPulse Forums!

    We offer a safe, inclusive community for transgender and gender non-conforming folks, as well as their loved ones, to find support and information.  Join today!

Job Dilemma


Guest Jaded1

Recommended Posts

Guest Jaded1

So the company that I have been working for, that for all intents and purposes is mine will be closing in the coming months. It is partially my decision and I am not sad about it one bit. It is time to move on and is an environment that would not be conducive to being able to transition.

Now here is the kicker.

I got offered a job that I had applied for a while back. It is EXACTLY what I was looking for. Pay is great and would afford me the ability to set aside enough each month to have all surgeries covered in about 2 1/2 to 3 years if all goes according to plan. Plus they would be giving me a full insurance (don't know if SRS would be covered yet though), 401k, dental, vision, company car and phone and even pay for additional schooling if I wish to pursue another degree. The job is with a multi billion dollar fortune 500 company.

So far amazing, right?

Well here is the problem.

Currently I have not started HRT yet so I (unfortunately) fully pass as a male. I have long hair but that is about it.

I am planning on starting HRT in the coming months as soon as my therapist gives the green light. I don't want to blow this job offer by telling them now, but on the same token, I don't want to get in and a year from now tell them, oh, by the way....

Any advice?

Link to comment
Guest Julie T

Jaded

Honey you want to be yourself, right? If you don't explain your gender dysphoria and what you plan to do, won't you have to live a lie for a long time? You will feminize if you go on HRT and be obvious in about six months to a year. The only other alternative is to not transition.

If you tell them now, you may not get hired, but again, you haven't said what work you do. Many jobs do not matter about gender.

Personally I would not want to put off transitioning any longer than necessary. I would also feel pretty bad if I waited, only to find out later, it wasn't that important to them at all, oh my!

Julie

Link to comment
Guest Jaded1

Jaded

Honey you want to be yourself, right? If you don't explain your gender dysphoria and what you plan to do, won't you have to live a lie for a long time? You will feminize if you go on HRT and be obvious in about six months to a year. The only other alternative is to not transition.

If you tell them now, you may not get hired, but again, you haven't said what work you do. Many jobs do not matter about gender.

Personally I would not want to put off transitioning any longer than necessary. I would also feel pretty bad if I waited, only to find out later, it wasn't that important to them at all, oh my!

Julie

I definately hear you.

The issue is right now it looks as though it is going to be feast or famine. My skillset is somewhat specialized in the automotive field (no offense to anyone here but I don't feel comfortable revealing much more than that right now).

Long story short, becuase of this, once my current employment ends, I am on the street and there will be no unemployment benefits due to a pretty ridiculous accounting screwup with the current company.

This opportunity will pay me triple bascially what I make now with benefits, one of which may very well cover HRT and dare I say, SRS. So in light of that my thinking is:

Get my foot in the door, work my butt off and prove to them that I am an invaluable employee. I am not going to put off transitioning as I don't see much point in continuing the charade, but I can sacrifice hiding some femininity for a while if necessary to land this job.

I don't mean to sound like someone asking for advice when I made up my mind already. I haven't. I just want to get advice from others like us in the oommunity as I am sure I am not the first to face this and there might be angles of this that I am just not seeing right now.

Link to comment
Guest Jaded1

Well I passed all of my tests and today had my phone interview which I also passed. Last step is the in person interview.

Please, anyone and everyone with something to put in, please do so. I can use all the insight/angles/advice here.

Link to comment
Guest MonikaC

Honestly, I would wait until you are hired and then talk to HR about it. Let them know that this is something that will be happening gradually and then impress them with your skills. Have you looked on the Corporate Equality Index for clues on what sort of policies they might have?

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean

.

Jaded......

Honey, I transitioned in my job over a period of a year and a half....

It was a very macho, electrical construction oriented job...

No one ever suspected anything ("Hey, is that a new shirt?") until I came out about a year ago....

It was a non issue...I made myself a valuable employee and not a thing changed when I came out to them....

Just letting you know...

Good Luck, Hon

Dee Jay

Link to comment
Guest Julie T

I definately hear you.

The issue is right now it looks as though it is going to be feast or famine. My skillset is somewhat specialized in the automotive field (no offense to anyone here but I don't feel comfortable revealing much more than that right now).

Long story short, becuase of this, once my current employment ends, I am on the street and there will be no unemployment benefits due to a pretty ridiculous accounting screwup with the current company.

This opportunity will pay me triple bascially what I make now with benefits, one of which may very well cover HRT and dare I say, SRS. So in light of that my thinking is:

Get my foot in the door, work my butt off and prove to them that I am an invaluable employee. I am not going to put off transitioning as I don't see much point in continuing the charade, but I can sacrifice hiding some femininity for a while if necessary to land this job.

I don't mean to sound like someone asking for advice when I made up my mind already. I haven't. I just want to get advice from others like us in the oommunity as I am sure I am not the first to face this and there might be angles of this that I am just not seeing right now.

Jaded

I think that is a good plan. It was good you got everyone's opinion, but in the end you know what is probably best for you, and the best course to take, This way looks very good, and thank you for the updates.

You will stay with us?

Julie

Link to comment
Guest Jaded1

Honestly, I would wait until you are hired and then talk to HR about it. Let them know that this is something that will be happening gradually and then impress them with your skills. Have you looked on the Corporate Equality Index for clues on what sort of policies they might have?

I have not yet, but I definately will. Thank you for that Monika!

Link to comment
Guest Jaded1

.

Jaded......

Honey, I transitioned in my job over a period of a year and a half....

It was a very macho, electrical construction oriented job...

No one ever suspected anything ("Hey, is that a new shirt?") until I came out about a year ago....

It was a non issue...I made myself a valuable employee and not a thing changed when I came out to them....

Just letting you know...

Good Luck, Hon

Dee Jay

Sounds good to me Donna. Now let me ask you, were you going through HRT at the time? Was there any smaller roadblocks or bumps in the road you ran into? Sorry for all the questions, just trying to gather as much info as possible.

Thanks

Link to comment
Guest Jaded1

Jaded

I think that is a good plan. It was good you got everyone's opinion, but in the end you know what is probably best for you, and the best course to take, This way looks very good, and thank you for the updates.

You will stay with us?

Julie

Honey, you couldn't get rid of me if you tried. LOL :wink:

Couldn't be happier that I found LP and the great people here.

Link to comment
Guest Julie T

Honey, you couldn't get rid of me if you tried. LOL :wink:

Couldn't be happier that I found LP and the great people here.

Jaded

And we are glad to know you (laughing).

Julie

Link to comment
Guest Donna Jean

Sounds good to me Donna. Now let me ask you, were you going through HRT at the time? Was there any smaller roadblocks or bumps in the road you ran into? Sorry for all the questions, just trying to gather as much info as possible.

Thanks

Yup!

I was on HRT the whole time!

Started to get called "Ma'am by some customers and some of the guys would look at me and wonder what that was all about...

Had to start wearing looser shirts....

People that see you everyday rarely see it happening..(especially the guys!)

But those contractors that see you every several months?...LOL It plays hell with their heads!

Huggs

Dee Jay

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Who's Online   8 Members, 0 Anonymous, 197 Guests (See full list)

    • Adrianna Danielle
    • Mmindy
    • Birdie
    • Petra Jane
    • Ivy
    • April Marie
    • Abigail Genevieve
    • Justine76
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Forum Statistics

    • Total Topics
      80.8k
    • Total Posts
      769.9k
  • Member Statistics

    • Total Members
      12,083
    • Most Online
      8,356

    Amberoni
    Newest Member
    Amberoni
    Joined
  • Today's Birthdays

    1. Alex2022
      Alex2022
      (20 years old)
    2. cvincent
      cvincent
      (69 years old)
    3. Demorriana
      Demorriana
      (25 years old)
    4. forbiddenforest
      forbiddenforest
      (26 years old)
    5. LoganXB
      LoganXB
  • Posts

    • Mmindy
      Congratulations on getting the go ahead with HRT. I'm so ready for my wife to drop her opposition. As for the mood swings... I would look forward to them myself.   Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • Birdie
      Three reprimands and they suspend attendance for a couple weeks. 
    • Mmindy
      Good for the other participant. What's involved in a reprimand? At our age, what are they going to do? Withhold snacks...   @BirdieI'm sorry you have to put up with such discrimination's. I'm proud that you're standing up for yourself.    Hugs,   Mindy🌈🐛🏳️‍⚧️🦋
    • MaeBe
      You’re so nice! Thank you. ☺️
    • Ashley0616
      I love that picture!
    • Vidanjali
      Associating LGBTQIA+ with pedophilia or "grooming" is a conspiracy theory as old as the study of psychiatry (mid-19th century) when early "scientists" theorized that homosexuality was caused by childhood trauma of having been molested by older men. Some of us have moved on and become educated since those days, but conspiracy theories have an uncanny staying power...the "power" of ignorance, including the titillation of scandal. There is some psychology about people being attracted to outrage and fear. Life is naturally dynamic and uncertain. Unless you have developed a transcendent mastermind, most people have some level of discomfort with that. Therefore, it is weirdly comforting to target a particular thing as a threat and to make a big fuss about it, whether or not it has any credence. And it is comforting to be one among a mass who are equally outraged about a thing, whether or not the thing is real. It is also boosts the ego to speak with vehement "authority" about a thing that is a known trigger for the masses. Like Vicky said, Dunning-Kruger Effect.   However prominent a movement there is or not of pedophiles claiming that their perversion is a sexuality (I have heard of that, but never as it being a major influence), it is the case that much of the viral spread of disinformation associating LBGTQIA+ with pedophilia is due to online trolls. Surely, there are loads of 'em. But here's just one reported story. https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/tech-news/posing-gay-men-twitter-troll-goes-viral-attempts-falsely-tie-n954721  
    • Birdie
      Another interesting day at the day-centre....   Another participant called me "sweet cheeks" and we both got reprimanded for inappropriate behavior. 🙄
    • Amberoni
      She stood at the world's edge, awaiting judgment Isolation judged to be an insufficient burden The skies above required a hand, precisely two To keep the heavens high and keep the vaulted sky from crushing you She bent her knee and gritted teeth, awaiting weight Mentally preparing mind and body for the grimmest fate. Her head was bent, the firmament so hard to hold, Her back against the wall and braced against a fall And all that matters is she never ever drop it There she stands.  If they weren't full, her head would be in her hands. Heroes they came, from far and from wide to gawk at the girl who held up the sky.
    • Jet McCartney
      This is a lovely look for you!
    • VickySGV
      Lets get this topic back on track folks.  Please spell out your acronyms for your specific meaning of the letter combinations and then re-read your own typing before hitting the send button.  We are here to be supporting each other and not stomping on someone's last nerve.  In the past we have used our DWF (Dirty Word Filter) to interpret certain acronyms and then the members were begging us to delete the posts for them one or two leaving with injured feelings.  Community Rules 7 (about posts being in clear English and Rule 8 (being suitable for people under 18) can come into play here. Thank you.
    • Abigail Genevieve
      I could be described, I suppose, as a RWNJ.   A little stereotyping seems to be going on.  Don't complain about Trans stereotypes if you turn around and stereotype others.  A lot of RWNJs are actually decent people and get called that by people who pick up on one or two alleged beliefs.  I would rather single out influential individuals of whatever camp and call them to correction.   Trans folk are a small minority, even as small minorities go.  There are probably a lot more RWNJs running around than there are trans folk.
    • Ivy
    • Ivy
      They cut a lot of trees here as well.  A lot of them toward the coast end up chipped up and sent to Europe to burn in power plants.  That bothers me, seems like a dumb idea.
    • Ivy
      Most likely.   Unfortunately this was expected.  I expect it will be the norm in any GOP controlled state that hasn't already done it.  So much effort expended against so few.  I certainly haven't seen my area being overrun by trans kids.   And yeah, I fully expect them to go after my HRT next. I think those that are railing against us are much more dangerous than some non-binary high school sophomore.
    • April Marie
      Her name is Sunny and she is so much fun. But, as you said @KymmieL, it is a challenge with a new puppy. Thankfully our 13 year old Lab is taking the addition in stride and being supremely tolerant.  
  • Upcoming Events

Contact TransPulse

TransPulse can be contacted in the following ways:

Email: Click Here.

To report an error on this page.

Legal

Your use of this site is subject to the following rules and policies, whether you have read them or not.

Terms of Use
Privacy Policy
DMCA Policy
Community Rules

Hosting

Upstream hosting for TransPulse provided by QnEZ.

Sponsorship

Special consideration for TransPulse is kindly provided by The Breast Form Store.
×
×
  • Create New...