I Came Out Through My Mother !omg!

[Guest ozge kara]

Today I went to the room of my mother where my sister temporarily sleeps (because of trouble with marriage). She has her stuff there for now and I was looking at a shoe of my sister and then out of now where.. my mother came in to the room.

I dropped the shoe and she asked me what are you doing? I said nothing (lol). She said ok (with question markts) and did her bed.

After a little while she came into my room and said: “I want to talk to you about something and I want you to tell me the truth because I know you where looking at the shoe of your sister”.

And then she asked if I feel like a woman. She wanted to ask me this question few months ago but was scared that I would react absurd. I replied with yes and I cried and told her everything.

She was so accepting and told me that she will always be there with me. She also told me that she now could connect all the things together, if only I brought you to therapy when you where 5 years old she said.

I am amazed of all the people I was for sure to believe that she would reject me but darn… she accepts it!!! I am so happy!!

Today before I came out to my mother, I made an appointment with my docter to tell her the whole thing. Because I can’t cope it anymore and I hope that she knows a little bit about transsexuality so she can help me. I am going to therapy after 1 month (on vacation) but I won’t tell my docter that. Just to see what kind of ideas she will have.

I will update this topic after my visit with the docter.

x

[Guest jennifer-at-home]

Very Cool , congratulations

good luck with the Doctor, I look forward to hearing your update, and I hope stories like yours can help me get the courage to come out to my mum, or I will leave this story open on her computer and let, your story explain what she needs to do

jen

[Guest ozge kara]

Thanks for your reply Jen.

You know i really thought that she never could accept it but she came very supportive. She even said whatever is needed i will help you with it even if it means that we need to move to another house.

Even though I told her everything she is now a little bit confused. Prepare yourself with questions like are you also attracted to boys? I told her that the inner sex and attraction sex is different. BUT that when I will be with HRT that I could change because the brain will then be rewired properly.

Jen what kind of connection do you have with your mother?

Because i think the way you interact is very important. I epilated my eyebrow a little bit. so through the time i gave a little bit of signs to her (and everybody around me).

For in stands i interact like a girl friend should to my GF and help her with clothes (even when we shop).

in 30 min. i will be speaking to my docter

I hope that you will come out too one day soon and maybe it will be like mine

[Guest jennifer-at-home]

yay time to feel awkward, when answering questions i'm not sure I know the answer to hopefully I will be somewhat used to it after telling my girlfriend and counsellor and doctor. Actually thinking about how difficult it was to tell my girlfriend, its going to be painful to get out... but on the plus side I am so open about it with my GF now, I had forgotten that.

I guess we are pretty close, sometimes its been a little us against the world through a whole mess of stuff, but it is difficult I have always been pretty closed off, hmmm it's difficult, so I am not sure, sometimes when you have been through hardtime's it is to relate to someone but maybe that just me being weird.

epilated your eyebrows scary. I have plucked my'n majorly far nicer and no longer bushy, have worn eyeliner around the house a couple of times so I guess little signs.

I will have to have ago at being my girlfriends, girlfriend helping her with shopping sounds fun

[Guest ozge kara]

hi everyone i just came from the docter. She said that she will refer me to genderpoli and that she will search things out first. she will call me before 5 o clock. i am now waiting for her call.

it was not my original docter but from this point i dont care which docter. i came out to her and she was nice and listened to me. she told me that she knows a little about this. so i also told about hrt etc.

she understood me also about the age issue (i am now 24 ) and that i need/want to stop testertrone in my body and we discuessed few things.

i asked if she could give me anti depression pills. she then said that it is better to start with the roots becaue those pills are not a sollution rather a temporary one.

i hope she will precribe me something because i know that genderpoli (at vumc) takes like a month or so hihi (i have not told her that).

more about after her call.

(ps. typed through my phone spelling falts excludite lol)

[Guest ozge kara]

hi,

so the docter called.. She tolded me that she has sent a mail to the genderpoli and that i will hear more on monday..oOk patience is know the key to success.

How can you walk with eyeliner at home? Isnt is noticable Jen?

[Guest jennifer-at-home]

to be honest it was more accidental, I thought I had removed it, all my mum said is 'are you wearing eyeliner' and I said 'yes' that was about the some total of it. she said to my girlfriend that it's good that I am expressing myself, hopefully an indication of a positive response to come .

sounds like you are progressing, bring on monday I guess

[Guest ozge kara]

ok so my doctor called monday and told me to call to the genderpoli at vumc. after she hang up i called them and i have an appointment next week on friday.

the last few days i feel very very depressed. its like i came out to my mother and sister but i am not progressing. i know its hard for them but can they realise how hard it was for me? all these years?

my mom said today that i could not handle it, that her world has fallen apart and that i justed need to STAY as a boy.

sorry but the point i told her was to get closer to her and now i feel all alone again. as i am writing i am lying on my bed and having suicidel thoughts. i just can t do the boy act any more i feel sick...

i pray to god to help me to release of this pain.

tommorow morning my sister is coming here to chat with me. i just know that she will tell me the same thing as my mother.

soo in the end.. all alone again :-(

i know that i have everyones support on the forums but i really need someone here next to me which supports me to the end...

[Guest Megan F]

All I can say is don't give up. You have already got the ball rolling so don't stop now, hopefully they will come around when they see how happy you are being YOU.

[Guest ozge kara]

thank you and i try to not be influenced by others..

today i finally came out to my gf.. i just could nt hold it anymore.. i became all emotional and cried and cried. she took it well and said that now everything made sense to her.

i told her that i might not be 100% sure because it is an long and hard road.. and that its not something that will happen at ones.

i tried to tell her everything but that just wasnt right because in my little experience its to much information.

i felt awfull and said to her that i am sorry for hurting her and sorry for the past three years (still crying) plus that i love her sooo dang much. and then she told me that i do not need to feel sorry and that she enjoyed the past three years. that made me happy and relieved. she also liked that i told her the truth but right now.. she is a little bit confused.

i love her to the bone. she is sooo special to me and i hope that she will stay in my life.

we haven't broke up and so i told her that i want her to let it sink and eventually decide what she wants (to break or not to break up).

she also loves me a lot but i dont know what will happen.

on my way home it rained very hard.. it felt like it was ment for us like the lovers we where now changed forever......

i feel relieved and emotional at the same time. i am now (almost) crying in the bed.

Edited August 7, 2011 by Donna Jean
Language......