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"is Your Husband Well?"


Guest -Jamie-

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Guest MonikaC

My wife and I bought our house a couple months ago. I met some of the neighbors early on, but haven't talked to anyone since going full time. My wife on the other hand seems to be the one they talk to.

It's not exactly that I avoid them. I'm sure they have all seen me at least. They all just seem to approach her rather than me. She has heard some things like neighbors asking other neighbors about us. Then today we were both outside for a while. So were some of our neighbors.

I had to go in for a minute when a couple of guys walked by. We had met their wives but not them. They stopped to talk to my wife and introduce themselves. Well, one of the questions they asked my wife is if her husband was well.

After talking with them for a few minutes it dawned on her what was going on.

The neighbors haven't seen her "husband" in a while. There is just this new woman living with her! They don't realize that I have transitioned.

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Guest Julie T

Monika

This is so funny. You are your wife's sister or girlfriend, or something? because, hey, they haven't seen you, for sure.

I hope your wife as a sense of humor.

Julie

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  • Forum Moderator

Well you can't doubt that you look like a natal woman with that kind of affirmation!

On the other hard it's both awkward and funny. What did your wife say?

I have not told the neighbors - if there are rumors around town they will hear but I haven't heard of any. Wish I had someone like your wonderful Hilary Kat!

Hugs

Johnny

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Guest Donna Jean

Well, one of the questions they asked my wife is if her husband was well.

After talking with them for a few minutes it dawned on her what was going on.

So.....the husband isn't doing so well???

lol

Dee Jay

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Guest John Chiv

Monika,

Now I want an update the next time this comes up and what your wife will say. She could say, "My husband is well and he is a great guy but please say hello to my wife who is the love of my life."

John

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Guest MonikaC

Monika

You are your wife's sister or girlfriend, or something?

Julie

I think everyone is dying to know what exactly I am.

Now what happens?

That is a good question. I don't really want to correct them... but at the same time I feel like I'm lying if I don't.

Things can get complicated can't they :)

I'd say!

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Guest MonikaC

What did your wife say?

Just that I was well. She wanted to tell them about me, but chickened out.

So.....the husband isn't doing so well???

Unfortunately the husband is not longer with us.... :)

Monika,

Now I want an update the next time this comes up and what your wife will say. She could say, "My husband is well and he is a great guy but please say hello to my wife who is the love of my life."

That is just awesome John! I'm going to share that with her.

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Guest Miss_Construe

That is really a fun day. I think your wife should wink at you and say something like "dead men tell no tales." "I am not dead!" "I know my love."

Even though she didn't do it this time it sounds like reception will be favourable (after some acceptance time).

april

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Guest Lizzie McTrucker

Well you could say he had to "go away for awhile" but then they'll think he's in prison so that's not a good idea after all.

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Guest Julie T

Monika

I keep coming back to this topic and laughing at the situation. It is so what we want, but it can get awkward sometimes. Sally told her family she was moving in with (my male name) in New Orleans. She is out to her mom and sister but they are in a friendly denial that is just strange. So I went with Sally back to her hometown, as myself of course, that (male name) doesn't exist anymore. But she had to let them know that I live in the same apartment complex, so in their mind I became the girlfriend. Later when Dee Jay came to live with us, Sally explained Dee Jay and I room together, in the same apartment with Sally! I am not sure how that works in their minds, maybe like that old comedy, Three's Company, on television. You younger people may need to Google that.

But they asked about (male name), so Sally said I moved out of state.

Julie

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Guest Lizzie McTrucker

This one you may have to eventually bite the bullet on.

If you say he passed away, then you'll have to answer questions about what, when, where, why there was nothing in the paper.

If you say he and the wife are divorcing, then you'll have to answer the questions about why, what happened, etc..etc..

If you say your wife confessed she really likes women so since you love your wife very much you became a woman for her, then you'll get a lot of weird stares and people backing away slowly.

So yeah, you may eventually have to bite the bullet and explain. Or well, I guess she'll have to explain since they pretty much only talk to your wife.

..or don't explain and just let them keep on trying to figure it out. :)

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