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Guest TheFearfulOne

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Guest Felicia Anne

first of all, welcome to the site. please accept this virtual welcome basket of fresh baked cookies!

i am very glad you have found your way here. it is a tremendous place of support and love. it is a place to meet new friends, to gather strength, to learn from some amazing sources of wisdom.

in reading your past posts, i think that reaching out to a gt is a very wise decision for you right now. i took a long time debating that, and having finally done so, i can tell you that meeting a therapist who works well with you and who understands what you are going through, and more to the point, has the training for specific questions and answers for your situation is a blessing! i went through 8 standard therapists in my lifetime, each one making me think that i'm stuck as i am and need to make the most of it. then i found my current gt, and together, we have worked wonders (and for the record, you both have to put in the work - therapy is not about someone waving a magic wand and making you all better - it's about the two of you establishing a safe and constructive common ground to build wonders). in the past year, i have found my true soul and the means to let her shine. i hope that you can find a similar experience, and that it is a start of a wonderful journey for you.

as far as the names go, when i was deciding my name, i wrote down a list of every name that i thought would fit me well. it started with jamie, and ended with april, and there were 15 in between. take your time and try some out.

plus, it's a lot of fun! :)

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  • 2 weeks later...
Guest TheFearfulOne

Ah.

A year older.

A year closer to pushing up daisies.

Another year of genetics messing up my life.

A mile closer to the abyss known as Oblivion.

Today's my birthday, and that's making me incredibly depressed. Add on the fact that we STILL don't have money for the therapist.

Sanity is in short supply. I try to hold onto it. As I do, more slips through my fingers.

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Guest cynthash

Ah.

A year older.

A year closer to pushing up daisies.

Another year of genetics messing up my life.

A mile closer to the abyss known as Oblivion.

Today's my birthday, and that's making me incredibly depressed. Add on the fact that we STILL don't have money for the therapist.

Sanity is in short supply. I try to hold onto it. As I do, more slips through my fingers.

Don't give up! We all want you to succeed, and you've only everything to gain by pressing forward!

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Greetings,

First of all, I'm sorry for not noticing this thread earlier.

Next, I want to congratulate you: finding the courage to come out to your mother isn't a small feat. In fact, acknowledging the issue and finding the courage to speak about it is a huge step. You have just started a wonderful journey of introspection and self-discovery that will eventually lead to you meeting your true self.

I won't lie to you: it ain't an easy journey. There will be moments when you feel like giving up. But what are the options? Going back? Getting stuck? The only real option is to go forward, and you have already proven that you have the courage to push yourself forward.

You may think that you are stuck because you can't get a therapist yet. I know how bad that feels, I was at a similar point some time ago. But you are already aware of what you need (a job) to go forward. Now that you know what you need, and why you need it, the only one who can stop you is yourself. Just don't let that happen: you are a human being and you deserve to be happy, never forget that.

This comes a few days late, but happy birthday. And I really mean it: I'd wish you had been happier on that day; although I can understand what made you depressed. The road ahead is long and rough, and can be quite daunting. But it may help to look behind: first, think about where you are right now, and where you were one year ago. And then, think about the direction towards which you are moving: if it's right, then just keep pushing forward; and if it ain't, it's a good moment to steer a bit and adjust your course. From what you have posted, it looks like you have acknowledged your gender identity, embraced your true self, and set things in motion to make things right: ain't that better than where you were standing one year earlier?

Let me share a little secret with you: sanity is overrated ;) A couple of years ago, I lost a job opportunity just because a personality test labelled me as "psychotic"; and I am thankful for that, because if I had got that job I wouldn't have my current one, which is far better :P As long as you stay in touch with reality, your sanity is doing well enough.

Try to focus your priorities. If a job is what you need to afford a therapist, then go out there and prove the world you are ready to work for what you want and need. This may be a tough time for job seekers (still enduring a worldwide recession), but persistence and commitment can be very strong allies. Keep in mind that each CV you deliver, and each interview you get, means one little step closer to your next objective.

And, by all means, don't forget this: you are not alone: you have the support from your parents, and from this whole community. These may be trying times, but I'm sure you have what it takes to overcome your trials.

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