What Do You Want?

[Guest CharlieRose]

I was talking with my dad yesterday, and he said two things that upset me: 1) That he didn't see the male in me, even though he couldn't say what the difference between being male and female was, exactly, besides physical differences and stereotypes, and 2) that he didn't know how to treat me as a boy; he didn't think he treated boys and girls any differently. I'm not out to the rest of my family yet, so the obvious things like calling me my guy's name and using male pronouns are out. I tried to explain to him, "Just think of me as your son and I'll be satisfied with that." and he refused, basically, on the basis of, "I don't know how to do that."

So, anyways, that got me thinking. What is it that you want to do, or that you do already, that makes you feel male? How are you looking forward to being treated or seen as, for pre-transition guys. What are some ways you've been treated differently after your transition for you guys that have that you really like? Basically, what is it that you want to accomplish in this transition?

I want to be my parent's son and my sister's brother.

I want to be lumped with the guys when someone says, "Boys over here, girls over there."

I want to have a beard.

I want to wear suits, ties, blazers and sweatervests. And in bright colors, like green, red, and purple.

I want my breasts GONE.

I want to swim wearing only my trunks.

I never want to be referred to as "cute" again! (Unless I'm called, "A cute little guy")

I want a deep, naturally male sounding voice.

I don't want to be the weird shy girl.

I want to be the funny little pithy guy. (One of my friends said that I don't say much, but when I do, I say a lot in few words, which made me feel special)

I want to check out girls. (My instincts actually have started of their own accord! Every once in a while I'll find I'm staring at someone, and then I realize it's because they're a really beautiful girl, like one of my friends, who I never noticed in that way before)

I DON'T want to be a lesbian.

I want to at one point have a girlfriend who's a head taller than I am. And I'll make her wear heels all the time.

I want to have a wife.

I want to be a dad.

That's all I can think of now. Anyone else?

[Guest Cody_T]

you said most of them... my additions are pretty lame

I want guys to take me seriously when I want to go paintballing or airsofting.

I want people to hit me. As hard as they can (no, but seriously, that whole "i can't hit a girl" thing pisses me off)

I want to not get picked last for sports that I can actually play well just because i'm "the only girl"

I want a boyfriend who sees me as a guy.

I want the hair on my legs to actually be visible (not sure how realistic that is because my brother's isn't either)

I want to play bloody knuckles (on the same subject of hitting, no one will play with me)

I want my friends to laugh when I do a faceplant and knock my teeth out

I want my parents to ask me to help out when they need heavy lifting and not when the dishes are dirty

I want to fix things rather than do the laundry

Even though i'm not attracted to them, I want girls to flirt with me.

I want to not be able to wear boxers in public

I want guys to ask me about things I don't even care about like cars and sports (okay, well baseball i could live with)

I want to never have to wear anything tight ever again in my life

I want to be the gay friend you tell everything rather than the girl friend you tell everything (somehow, people always tell me everything)

that's all i have right now... i like this idea though, so if I come up with more i'll add them

[Flint]

What do i want hmmmm.....

1. To be seen as male at all times

2. To wear suits, ties

3. To have a girlfriend who sees me as a man

4. To be refered to by the correct pronouns. No more she or her i want "His" "he"

5. I want breasts gone.

6. When i can stand up again (I'm working on it with physio and refuse to give up till i'm walking again) i wanna pee stood up! lol

7. Finally be happy.

[Guest Nelly]

Hi,

interesting list. Actually I am a guy but want to be a girl. So all points of your list should be inverted for me. Actually they are instead of

"I want to fix things rather than do the laundry"

I like fixing things and I think that this is a point you can also do now and not waiting until you are a guy.

I am wondering that farting is not on the list

By the way, peeing without sitting is not that big thing. I learned to do it in a sitting way because if you share the toilet, it is more clean after. I know some girl who can pee in a standing way. It need some training but it work.

Greetings

Nelly

[Guest raydub]

a couple of them have been said, but these are really important to me.

I want to fight again in the ring against another guy who wont think twice about how hard he's hitting me.

I want to wear a gi with no shirt underneath.

I want to be called sir on the phone instead of ma'am.

I want to open my own doors to places and hold doors for ladies without that weird sideways glance from them.

I want to hear all the dirty jokes in the office.

I want to be the man of the house - breadwinner - working to take care of my family.

I want to be recognized as someone's son, grandson, uncle, brother, father.

I want to sound to everyone else the way I sound to myself in my head.

I want everyone to see me the way I see me in my head.

thats enough for me to put myself, my family, my spouse, and the world through all this crap with me.

its not easy, but if it were then everyone would do it. transition may not be for everyone because there is certainly a lot to deal with (reactions, changes, etc).. but its for me. i know it is for me. and i will have it.

Raymond W. III

[Guest Cal]

I feel like I could do all these things except

I'll never have a penis.

Ever

:/

[Guest harvester52]

The things I want... (and they're a lot the same as other folks' here.)

I want a flat chest.

I want facial hair.

I want to pee standing up.

I want my step dad to invite me to go do jobs with him and my brother.

I want a job doing hard labor where the boss knows me as a man.

I want a wife.

I want to be a father.

I want to wear men's formal clothing.

I want to pick up a girlfriend in a big truck and take her on a date where I pay for everything.

I want my family to recognize me as their nephew/son/grandson/etc.

Most of all... I want to be happy and comfortable. I'm starting to be neither.

-BC

[Guest Jackson]

Great list. Even though I'm only in the early part of the hormone stage, I'm not treated differently by anyone. But some people already see me as male and others don't. So I expect for some people, the way they treat me will change.

My list:

I want other people to see me how I see myself in my head.

I want a wife.

I want to be a father.

I want a flat chest.

Most of the other things listed, I've already got.

My two cents, yet again.

Jackson

[Guest CharlieRose]

I got "sir"ed TWICE today, and I must say, I very much enjoyed that. I want to be a "sir."

[Guest Quinn]

Well, much like many people have said - these have been said before, but are nevertheless important.

- I want to wake up and just pull a shirt on, not having to worry about binding anything down or worrying if I did a convincing enough job binding. I want these things gone.

- On that similar note, I want to be able to take my shirts off. Go swimming, or if it's really hot and I'm outside, whatever.

- I want to be the son, I want to be the uncle, and I want to be the brother.

- I don't want these "curves". Hips/thighs being the place where the weight gathers? Gah. No.

- I want to be "the guy/boy/man", never the "girl/woman who BECAME a..."

- I want to at least have the choice of facial hair.

- I want to have to hold doors open for people, not have them opened for me.

- I want to be the man who cares for and takes care of and protects his family; not oppressively, but sincerely. The way it should be.

- I want a lower voice.

- I want to be able to use the men's room/changing rooms/locker rooms.

- I want my name to really be mine, not the "official" one.

- I don't want it to be "weird" when I go to formal events in male formal wear.

I could probably go on and on, heh...

[Guest StrandedOutThere]

After reading what everyone else has said, I guess my list isn't too unique.

I want to be a brother and a son instead of a sister and a daughter.

I want to make pretty girls nervous because I'm cute and funny.

I want to be sir, not ma'am.

I want some muscles! ...big ones.

I want a flat chest... at least I know I am definitely getting this one.

I don't want to be hyperactive because it is embarassing at my age when you can't sit still.

I want a decent paycheck.

I want to be able to work on my car, in my front yard, without having people ask me if I need help. I don't. If I did, I'd be asking for it.

I want people to not be surprised at my hobbies and about the things I enjoy. I just want them to be normal things.

I want it to be okay for me to be good at things and be competitive.

I want people to not give me business for speaking my mind and not putting up with their BS.

I want a pretty girlfriend that I can spoil.

Eventually I'd like a wife.

Oh...and Ray, if you ever need dirty jokes, I am your man. Apparently I am known for this around my office. I had no idea until today.

[Guest mystiktiger]

i want to be able to go shirtless in the summer and feel the sun on my back

i want a girlfriend who will treat me like the man that i am

i want to be one of the guys instead of the butch female

i want girls to look at me the way they look at my male friends

i just wanna be able to be me without the weird looks and whispers behind my back

i want to be able to where shorts and a tank top outdoors without my mom and friends

refusing to be seen with me unless i shave my legs and underarms

i want to be able to use the men's room instead of the woman's room

i want the world to except us for who we are

[Guest Evan_J]

I want to be able the phone and have a woman who's calling me for the first time catch her breath at how deep my voice is.

I want to take my shirt off outside because its hot and I'm annoyed. (chest reconstruction)

I want someone to intentionally direct me to the mens room.

I want to pull at the collar on a mens dress shirt and frown a little because its tight.

I want to go into a jewelry store and automatically be shown the mens items.

I want never ever again in this lifetime to have any ________ male clerk in a gas station give me change and decide to add "sweetie", "hon", or anything freaking else to it. (Actually that one's been stopping)

I want my shoulders to be broad.

I want to be a good son, a strong man, and an example of what a sincere male could be

I want to be able to "get up again" when I fail at any of those things

I want to remember to be thankful for the things I've been lucky enough to experience already

I want to be able to have my face shaved in the barber shop.

I want to be able to remember and know how to be "caring" or "loving" even once I'm a male

[Guest skyy]

hmmm........yep, you all are definitly dudes. good luck with all of that. i think i should come up with a list too, that sounds like a cool idea.

[Guest Jack Solomon]

I want to open my own doors to places and hold doors for ladies without that weird sideways glance from them.

I hate that look! I always automatically opened doors for people since I was a child. I think I got laughed at once by this girl with her guy and it stuck with me for a while.

Some of mine:

-I want to be perceived as a male in social situations.

-I want not to feel like I've failed all the time.

-I want to be seen as the intelligent, funny guy friend who gives valuable advice, not the female friend who gives valuable advice.

-I want women to look at me like they look at other guys, and I want guys to look at me and see another guy.

-I want to be referred to as 'he', 'sir', 'him' by strangers and not 'her', 'she', 'that girl'.

-I want to succeed and be proud of doing the things I've always wanted to accomplish but stopped myself from attempting.

-I want eventually to be seen by someone as a good example of a man.

-I want never again to worry that a guy won't be my friend because I look female on the outside.

-I want to put on mens tailored clothing and have it fit the way it fits on a male.

Solomon

[Guest raydub]

mmm tailored clothing. ive gotta piggyback on that one.

-Ray

[Guest jantonio]

Adding to the list:

- I want to be called "sir" all the time and "he"

- I want my brother and sister to call me and see me as their brother

- I want a gotee, a mustache and some nice side burns

- I want to stand to pee

- I want my parents to see me for who I "really" am.

There are some more but these will do for now.

Jose Antonio...

[Guest GoldenKirbichu]

My list is going to be... different, I guess, but similar in most ways.

- I want to be seen as a man, unconditionally and everywhere at any time in any place.

- I want a flatter chest, a chest I'm not pushing down all the time with my arms, a chest that I don't feel paranoid over because it makes a shadow on my shirt. I want to not have to worry about binding or being shirtless and slim.

- I want to be the kind of uncle that the kids like when/if there are any for me to be an uncle for.

- I don't want to be "that girl who became a man".

- I want to be a successful MALE scientist, recognized not because I am different but because I am skilled.

- I don't know about sports... but I would like to be a little stronger. It'd be nice.

- I want to be valued because I'm a person, not because I happen to be a transman.

- I want to be seen as sexy, attractive and masculine to someone, preferably another man, even if I don't have and never will have a flesh penis. (This one seems almost impossible )

- I want all the little masculine things in life to be something I should just naturally do instead of obsessing over whether I'm presenting enough to pull it off.

- I want to be able to put on makeup, dress in the most extravagantly feminine clothes, not bind and not pack, and still be called "sir". And this would be me being serious about it... even if I'd never really do it.