Need Advice

[Guest jamieg]

i was always wondering about why i have a big long scar and then i finally connected that and the fact that one of my doctors was using the word hypospadias and so i looked up what hypospadias is and that is how i discovered that the scar is explained partially by this

and in reading further in intersex i found that you can be mistaken for one gender and so assigned accordingly and am now wondering if the hypospadias theory is wrong and the fact that i am transitioning from assigned m to f if there is actually a different kind of intersex that i actually have and i could really have the kind that i have enlarged things that appear to be male genetals and so that is why they assigned me as m

right now everything is only a theory and want to know what others think

[Guest Michele H]

I must confess that I know little on this subject but it just seems so very wrong for a doctor to make that kind of judgment call at birth. I wonder if there is any bases for a mal practice suit since you have fix the doctors mistake?

[Guest TAguiar]

One can not entirely certain without knowing exactly what scarring you have, and other variables, but it may be possible you had more than hypospadias... Depending on the length and position of the scar(s), one can determine what surgeries were done, and from that, why. Continue to ask questions, you will find your answers.

[Guest Evan_J]

You definately need to ask lots of questions. You could even ask to see the medical records of your birth; they are your records, you have a right. Have a doctor explain them to you if possible. There was a time where it was "impressed" upon doctors to assign sexes in cases where they thought it "best" and not notify even the parents. They thought it was "less tramatic".

[Guest My_Genesis]

There was a time where it was "impressed" upon doctors to assign sexes in cases where they thought it "best" and not notify even the parents. They thought it was "less tramatic".

How long ago was this, exactly...?

[Guest Evan_J]

I know its been sited and criticized lately as having been "common" in the 60's in these instances but dunno if it also occured in other time frames. I'll try to find any of what I previously read about it but you'll do well to check it out for yourself. What I recall though was that they were "advised" by the AMA to do so as standard procedure since it was thought that the average parent would not be able to handle it psychologically and socially unless the child could fit neatly into being able to be tagged clearly female or clearly male. The thought then was that the child -not knowing it had occured- could be raised to be whichever sex they made it and would "live happily" as that It was a much more "ignorant" time frame. And they've had to learn differently by seeing what happens to a lot of those people....

[Guest My_Genesis]

Just wishfully thinking it was more recent than that

Oh well. Even though this wait for testing and all is getting pretty short it's still kinda killing me

[Guest Little Sara]

I know its been sited and criticized lately as having been "common" in the 60's in these instances but dunno if it also occured in other time frames.

Actually this went on unabashed until the mid-90s, and still continues to this day in the majority of hospitals. Recommendation as to wait for the child to tell you his or her identification and require consent from the child for hormonal or surgical intervention is relatively recent...and pretty theoretical. There is no law against a doctor deciding he's John Money, or God, and doing it all over again.

[Guest Paula :)]

this is an old thread but does hold a great deal of interest for me, being 47xxy. i read a book not so long ago about intersex conditions. one of the chapters spoke of the perceived difficulties people would face introducing an 'it' to the world. what's the first question people ask you when you have a baby – boy or girl? and what do you say? um, well kinda both, we don't know. oh my god, what have these people given birth to?

so doctors and surgeons often made the choice for us. remember, these were more often than not OLD MEN the majority of which, in my not so considered opinion, would have been very UNWORLDLY, conservative types. how they felt the child might best fit in to the world is how they made their decision.

more recently, and this story really made me feel quite ill, i saw an australian television show called RPA, a reality hospital show set in the royal prince alfred hospital in sydney, australia. an xxy child was born with most everything male and female, and the parents were consulted as to whether they WANTED a boy or a girl. they wanted a boy, so the doctors surgically modified the baby to be male and remove any female 'components'.

while i know this is an incredibly complicated and difficult situation for everyone involved, would it not have been prudent for the rights of this little baby to be taken in to consideration? yes, i understand that it impossible for the baby to goo or gaa their male or female preference, but how about leaaving the child alone in the surgical modification stakes until they can make the decision for themselves, at say puberty, when we all seem to realise once and for all who we are.

sure, make the decision to tell people which gender you have assigned in the interim, as parents, but don't butcher them so they have fewer options available to them in the future.

my apologies for being so opinionated on this topic!

paula (Y)

[Monica_Jennifer]

Paula :

I know what you mean .. as in 1965 I was one such case who had a full set of outer genitalia and internal organs of both sexes when born. A week later my dad sent mom off on vacation saying he would care for me while she would be away. As soon as she left he took me bck to the hospital and had me assigned male .. removing my 3/4 formed Uterus .. Fallopean Tubes .. Cervix and Ovaries and having the misshappen Vagina between my outer male parts sealed. There was a second urethral opening that was closed after them snipping the second urethral segment and sealing that opening off on the main urethral tube to penis. For me that choice my father made left a life of heck for me in my younger years .. as I identified as female from as early as age 4 and my father could not accept this. I'm now 43 and a Pre-Op Intersex MTF and have to reverse his choice that should have been mine to make in the first place.

Monica_Jennifer