a revelation in my struggle to live.....

[Guest eliza.d]

my wife brought it to my attention, and it immediately made sense to me.

i had always been a childish, irresponsible, and unhappy person. i had made ridiculously immature impulsive decisions in my life before coming out.

heres the revelation,

my mind was trapped as that of a little girl trying to pretend to be a boy and then a man. i was never able to handle the responsibility of and adult life, my mind in some way had not matured past that of a child. since i was supposed to be a girl, my mind couldnt handle being a man and i was never able to see the responsibility of an adult life from an adult perspective.

it seems, since coming out, and beginning hrt, my mind has finally caught up with my age and now i take on everything in my life as the adult woman i have become. it literally happened almost overnight.

i now see everything clearly and from an adult perspective. i am making rational, mature decisions a

now. no more childish thoughts and behaviors. its sort of like my mind was trapped in never never land and it could not grow up.

now, that has changed. there will always be the child in all of us, but my gd was prohibiting me from mentally maturing.

what an amazing change self realization makes. and these magical hormones.

i am sooo happy and more well adjusted.

i feel normal now, for the first time in a life of misery and uncertainty, i am no longer miserable or uncertain.

a fact, i am sooo excited to be alive, and i am certain of many, many things that were previously hidden and invisible to me.

what a joy it is to be alive, to be who i am. to have become who i am.

truly miraculous.

love,

Eliza

[Guest Teri G]

truly wonderful. i wish i had the strength to face this fully with MY spouse. I feel like i am being held back.

teri

[Guest Audrey Elizabeth]

Eliza....EXACTLY!!! Well said. For me it was like I stopped right before puberty or something and since coming out there is this tremendous growth that happens from the inside. My wife started telling me a year ago that I acted like a 12 year old girl. I took it as a compliment and I can see know that it was, even if at the time she might have not had the best intentions when she said it. But after a year on hormones we both can look back and see that it was at that point when my wife started seeing that I was indeed a girl. Now a year later she lovingly says I am around 25 and a woman. HAHA. I wish I really was somewhere around that old.

For the first time I can really start just being me and that just allows so much good to happen and allows me to start catching up to all my peers.

Keep it up girl!

Audrey

[Guest Donna Jean]

.

All I can say about this is.....when I started HRT......

I became much more focused in my job and worried much less about the dysphoria and transitioning....

It had a calming effect.....

Maybe physical, maybe psychological. I don't know....

But, I felt much better emotionally...

Huggs

Dee Jay

[Guest eliza.d]

thanks audrey, i knew i wasnt the only one with the immaturity-dysphoria correlation.

donna jean, i know what you mean about focus and emotional stability after starting hrt. even though i have the occasional cry now and then, but tears of joy and love are a blessing.

amen,

Eliza

[~Nova~]

I don't know about my attention, but I have gotten stupid. I swear.

My writing is terrible at best and my spelling is god awful. It's like someone switched the smart switch.

Glad it's having a good affect on you

A

[Guest eliza.d]

autumn, maybe theres another cause for those symptoms.

i dunno, just a thought,

Eliza

[~Nova~]

autumn, maybe theres another cause for those symptoms.

i dunno, just a thought,

Eliza

Of course their is. It's called life. As in: I'm way to busy being happy and living to really care about writing.