The Number One Reply, I'm Not Sure

[Ashley0616]

It doesn't need to be rushed. Just take it day by day and think about what you want to do. It could take six months or whatever but you will make a sound decision on what you want to do.

[Ashley0616]

I secretly dressed in my sister's clothes while growing up. When I was 18 I had my own place and bought an outfit that I would wear when I wasn't at work. I got other outfits and boots and then felt disgusted with myself so I threw them away. I now have been fully transitioned with almost everything showing as Ashley instead of Scott. I don't wished I transitioned earlier because I wouldn't have my two sons.

[Ivy]

4 minutes ago, Ashley0616 said:

I don't wished I transitioned earlier because I wouldn't have my two sons.

It's a bit like that for me too.  Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if I had done it sooner.  My therapist actually suggested writing about it as a story.  But I do love my adult children, and some of them are my biggest supporters.

[Ashley0616]

2 minutes ago, Ivy said:

It's a bit like that for me too.  Sometimes I wonder what it would have been like if I had done it sooner.  My therapist actually suggested writing about it as a story.  But I do love my adult children, and some of them are my biggest supporters.

That's awesome that they support you. I'm hopping since they are young while I'm transitioning, they will be big supporters. 

[mattie22]

I am new to this site and kinda scared  to even come to a site like this. 1 i donot know really if I am even trans or not  I know I amqusting my gender fore sure.  I  grew up thinking m one thing and if you  would have explained the baics of gender  when I was in my teens I would have probly said I was a cis male and ment it.  But I geuse thats  becuse  well I am  ok  with seeing myself as one even  thogh  I  I probly fitin the gendr nonconforing . but I also a part of me likes to be seen and treated Like a fmale somtimes.  When I was ynger I crosdress in secret and I started up again.  I also tuck .  tHE THING IS i CROSS DRESS FOR MANY RRSIONS   AT FIRST OUT OF CURISTY AND THEN JUST BECUSE i LIKE TO WEE TH CLOSES.  aLSO SOMTIMES  ITS PARTLY SEXAL AS WELL SOMTIMES BEUSE IT HELS ME TO SEE WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO BE FEMALE AND i LIKE IT.  somtimes I wish I were female as well that comes and goes  uslly  it does not last long.   This has happened more recently.  But it s not like i knew as much about gender untell the last cople of yerses .also turns out I am bisexal it took me while did not know this I thogh i was strait for most of my life. I. ok  I better ened this post. for now.

 

[VickySGV]

@mattie22 Welcome to the Forums Mattie.  Our basic view here is that if you have any questions about your gender then you are not Cis Gender and belong here for that reason alone, because if you are not Cis, then you are someplace in the Trans and/or Non Binary part of the world, and on this site, that is simply who is here, Trans and NB folks!  Be comfortable and do not be afraid to ask questions here, or even give answers to others from your own experience.

[Charlize]

Welcome Mattie.  When i got here i was at a point bin my journey when i was discovering my path.  Writing about it and reading about others helped me greatly as did gender therapy.  Perhaps the hardest thing was finding self acceptance without feeling guilt at simply being me.

Enjoy your time here. 

You are not alone.

 

Hugs,

 

Charlize

[Ivy]

Yes, welcome Mattie.

[Ashley0616]

Welcome Mattie! I would recommend the first step is finding a gender therapist and see if you are or aren't. Then one of the biggest steps if you are do you want to start hormone replacement therapy. The decision should be thought long and hard. There are irreversible effects. Looking forward to your next post! Take care!

[mattie22]

I thought Hey, I can't be experiencing Gender destroyer because it doesn't fit the narrative, but Hey I can. I am experiencing mild discomfort in relation to my gender. Because and that can be a form of mild form of it this forum because their elements of my gender that are out of alignment with my sign gender at birth.

There are elements of my gender I have been holding back on some I did not even know for fear it did not fit was told was not very manly or in some other way not correct for someone who is an amab. I tried embracing and expressing some of these parts of me even for just a little bit every once in a while and it feels like a relief to me like a weight has been lifted.