Strap-on question?

[Guest Talon]

Hey everyone,

I have a question for you that I hope is ok to ask.

How do you feel about strap-ons/having sex using a strap-on? My girlfriend really likes the thought and to a certain extent I do as well but still I am just not sure how I feel about it and we are talking back and forth.

I know transguys feel very differently about packers a well. Personally, I don't mind packing but I rarely do it because I don't really feel like it adds to my confidence or well-being. Anyways. The thought of using a strap-on is in a way a good thought because you'd be able to do stuff with it. On the other hand, I feel intimidated and dysphoric at the very thought because I'd actually have to step into a harness and strap on something plasticcy with no sensation and thus be reminded that my own body is not capable of doing what I wanna do.

I'm thinking a prosthetic that can be attached to your body with adhesive may be more comfortable like that.

How do you feel about using a strap-on? And are there any in particular that works real well or real bad for you?

Just curious.

Talon.

[JJ]

Haven't used one Talon but I have thought about it. There is something very erotic for many people about being able to please a partner. And I would want the relationship to be satisfactory for her. That would add to it for me.

So I'd use one under the appropriate circumstances. In fact there are some that don't require a harness but are sort of double ended I think I'd experiment with if the circumstances were right. There are so many options out there. And what felt awkward at first may be just the opposite later.

You are young enough that you may see the time that we have better options but for now it's kind of a matter of psyching yourself I think.

But basically we are all highly individual when it comes to this I suspect. And each relationship varies as well

Johnny

[Guest Masculinity]

If I were you, I'd go ahead and put the strap on. Sure, it would feel weird at first but you'll get used to it. There's nothing to be dysphoric about... because at least you are playing the guy part in sex. So don't say that you feel intimidated or dysphoric to do this.

Don't feel dysphoric about using a strap on and all that... feel great that you are finally going to do something a biological male does. Remember that you are doing this because you are in reality a guy. I say it because I have went through something similar... once I tried to pee standing but felt dysphoric because I was forcing my body into doing something that it is not capable of doing, since I don't have a penis. But then I convinced myself that I am doing it because I'm just being MYSELF... a guy. Hope this helped!

[Guest Jaques]

Titanium, this for a transguy can be a very difficult one because i know from others and myself, the need to be male in this respect, to have sex in a way which enables you to feel "right". Yes, using a strapon can be awkward, you cant feel it but your partner can and the minds a powerful tool, pun intended and those stick on prosthesis are expensive,can be uncomfortablewhen you lie on them in bed and problematic, you dont need a strap but you still have no sensation either. We are all different but i found that, though its not perfect and not always easy, accepting "this is how it is" is the best way to deal with the problem. Being in a LTR makes that easier of course as your partner knows who/what/how you are - its not an easy subject to write about without being explicit. There are soft, slim, leather straps and very realistic dildos out there, cyberskin etc, and i find wearing boxers and pulling it through helps me cope as then i dont have to see the straps. My partner doesnt mind either way, but i do. I totally understand the mind problems associated with all this and theres no easy answer except having patience with yourself and living the best way you can with what you have available to you.

[Guest Jaques]

sorry Talon, i wrote "titanium" which is your membership status - lol!

[Guest seanjamie]

Hey Talon I'm sorry I can't offer any advice on this front other than to - do what you feel is best... which I'm sure you will.

I really just wanted to say I get where your coming from on this and it's not easy but I'm sure you'll discover the best option for you,

your a pretty determined guy from what I've seen you write in the past.

Goodluck man

~Sean

[Guest Clair Dufour]

The answer is whatever makes both of you satisfied in your relationship. That can vary from the FTM's known as Stone Butch to the very equal Saphic lovers. One thing to remember is that affection is pretty much gender free.

[Guest leo]

Hey talcon! I use one it's the only way ill have sex with th mrs. On mine because of where te straps are its rubs against my little man during sex so I can be pleasured to in a way that isn't uncomftable. Hope this helps

[Guest Maria_B]

My friend Jack told me about his experience in this regard, and I've just asked and got his permission to relay it here, so I hope you guys don't mind me popping in.

He said the first time his girlfriend and he did it was awkward. He felt cheated, and fake. His girlfriend urged him to try again. He said the second time around was actually enjoyable. I'm not sure if the next part is TMI but he found dirty talk helped... If you know what I mean by that. Otherwise PM me and I'll give specific examples.

What he said helped was to wear his underwear over the top and pull the phallus through.

*bows and steps out*

[RoxannaBell]

The title of this thread caught my eye (imagine that!) but really, the only thing I have to offer to the conversatin is that Helen Boyd (whom I'm sure most of you have heard of) says that every woman should at least try one on just to feel the power it gives... I would assume that for a FTM this would be even more true?

[Guest Talon]

Thanks for the posts, everyone! I guess the only way is to try it out. And Maria, judging from your story I should get back on the horse (no pun!) even if it's not great the first time. I just wanna find a solution that works well for both of us.

Thanks for sharing everyone, I really appreciate it!

Cheers,

Talon.