You can call me Jim

[Guest RocketJim]

So I've been reading stories about people finding out about being trans and all online and its like "ARGH!! Where was all this when I was growing up?!" I realize I'm only 25 but it makes me feel old.

Anyway. I never went through the confusion of thinking I was going to grow up to be a guy only to be duped with different parts. No, I always knew what was in store for me. And hated it. I remember trying so hard to fit in with my brother and my cousin, which should have been easy. I was always a tomboy. Prefered short hair, jeans and t-shirts, was usually stronger than most boys my age and just never understood about girly things. When it the inevitable time came that I started to develop I was crushed. On some level I still hoped it wouldn't happen. The fact that I had to get my first bra at 11 didn't help.

My mom was always trying to get me to wear dresses or just feminine clothes. It was a constant struggle between us for years. I was always so frustrated and I didn't know why. But her response to everything was "You're a girl!"

It wasn't until I was 16 and got my first computer that I really learned about any of this. And it wasn't some "OMG this explains so much!!" type reaction. More like "Well, alright". I even tried explaining it to my mom once. All she took from it was that I was a lesbian. Which, while there is nothing wrong with that, I'm not. She also took it upon herself to tell this to my brother. To which I promptly explained that I hadn't said that. Probably explains a lot of my reluctance to tell anyone else.

I'm not quite sure how no one knows, though. And if they do than its just that no one's ever mentioned it. I haven't worn women's clothing in like 10 years, I act more masculine than my male cousin and I go by the name Jim. Unfortunately I'm all alone in this. I literally don't have any friends I'm not related to and I get freaked out just thinking about going to the nearest Pride Center. Just a lonely guy in need of some commraderie.

[Guest Lacey Lynne]

Hey, welcome, man!

You've really come to the right place. You'll find acceptance and commraderie here, most certainly. Post away. We'd be happy to hear from you!

Rock On Lacey Lynne

[Guest Chase]

Hey Jim,

Welcome to the forum, I am in the same boat as you, my family thus far has been a complicated story. so I feel for you bro. I could use a friend to talk with and share and help one another, so hit me up if youd like. I hope things get better with your family, I had to recently have a blow out with my mom which I did post about, so you can read that if youd like, or even my intro post.

Much love,

and like I said if you need someone hit me up

Chase

[Carolyn Marie]

Welcome to the Playground, Jim. Like Lacey said, you've come to the right place. We can offer you friendship, information, advice, and support, and sometimes that is enough to keep you going.

If you don't know already, one of the first things you need to do is find a gender therapist, who will help you determine if in fact you are transsexual (which it appears you are) and will help you find the right path forward for you. Hopefully you have a source of income, so that you don't have to rely on the approval of your parents. The G.T. will also help you figure out the best approach to telling (or re-telling) your parents.

Please post in any of the forums, and ask any questions you like. We'll do our best to give accurate information and good advice. I do ask all our new members to please read the site Terms and Conditions.

HUGS

Carolyn Marie

[Guest Krisina]

Welcome Jim to Laura's. Thanks for telling us a bit about yourself and what you have had to deal with too. It's not easy when ones we love are either not supportive or just don't understand. It's hard enough for someone dealing with GID to figure themselves out, let alone explain it to others. I hope you will find it easier as you take steps to tackle all of this. In the meantime you might want to check out the possibility of seeing a "gender therapist" They can make a world of difference in having you better understand yourself.

Grab some of our famous chocolate chip cookies and milk or glass or apple juice and make yourself at home.

Krisina

[Guest RocketJim]

Thanks for the welcome. Unfortunately right now I'm pretty financially dependant on my family. And I'm not quite sure how I'd go about finding a therapist without any money or insurance. Seems like at the moment my life's just kind of on hold until I can figure something out.

[gennee]

Welcome to Laura's, Jim. Perhaps you can find like minded folks at the pride center that you mentioned. That's how I found out about what I was struggling with. I was 56 when I discovered that I was transgender.

[Guest miss kindheart]

Hi Jim,

<<< hug >>>

Welcome to Laura's Playground.

Please feel free to come over and chat sometime.

The Chat room does require another registration that is separate from from your forums one.

Please read the chat room rules before coming in, and expect a short interview with one of the chat room moderators.

One of the things that they will ask you is if you read the rules.

We all look forward to seeing you.

vanna